Mates Got Neighbour From Hell

T

Tremaine

Guest
#1
Evening, lads n lasses. Just got back from mate' Alan's place (Social Housing). He just rang to say his neighbour from hell upstairs, has come home, and "banged or kicked hard on his (my mate's) wall, twice". Rattled the living room he reckons and scared his missus half to death.

Real antisocial behaviour and chances are his safety's on the line somewhere, eventually. Only last week the chod upstairs leaned out of the upstairs window and called out to him "what you farkin looking at you little cnut?" . Witnessed, he says, and reported to his RSL. No action.

Considered going back and filling him in, can't do that. Can't really do anything, but the guy has PTSD and this will bother him and his wife for days, and they're a nice couple. He reckons calling OB would make things worse, and he has to live with this eejit anyhow. Chances are his RSL won't do shoite about it.

What to do? call Plod, or fill the tw@t in, or just stag on :?
 
#2
RSL?

Tell him to start a diary.

msr
 
#5
Gather a small assualt party, wait outside the said tw@s house, and take him away once he surfaces.

There are plenty of freshly dug fields in Kent if you need to "hide" him.
 
#6
Yes. You need to be able to produce more evidence than 'he once called me nasty names'.

msr
 
#7
Get some mates in and educate them in the ways of civilised behaviour, we had the same probs they got the hump because all i got was a talking to by the old bill. But they got asbos they have now moved. Get some mates to do the damage so your mate isnt involved.
 
#8
Sounds familiar. Two years ago I had the same problem (they were Poles). Phoned the police and the council and they did diddly squat, we put our house on the market and lost money on it, eventually flogged to a Gurkha family. Just before we moved the Poles overstepped the mark.

Their mistake!

Long story short was that they got filled in and I ended up in Crown Court charged with allsorts. Luckily the Judge was a good 'un and I got away pretty lightly.

Lesson I learnt from this was to exagerate to the police whats going on and they will turn up unlike them not bothering their arses every time I called them as I knew what was going to happen but at the end of the day you just sometimes have to do what you have to do.

Did I regret it? Yes and No especially sitting in a cell for nearly 24 hours thinking 'well that's me well and truly fcuked this time'!
Hope he sorts it out before it goes to far for his sake.
 
B

Biscuits_AB

Guest
#9
Tremaine said:
Real antisocial behaviour and chances are his safety's on the line somewhere, eventually. Only last week the chod upstairs leaned out of the upstairs window and called out to him "what you farkin looking at you little cnut?" ...........

What to do? call Plod, or fill the tw@t in, or just stag on :?
Maybe best giving option 2 a miss then eh?
 
Z

Zarathustra

Guest
#10
Get some mates round a few nights until said chod kicks off. Then, head to his flat knock on his door and politely inquire to his well being.

If he keeps being a chod, he could alwasy trip while walking down a dark alley, it's ver dangerous out at nights these days.

Or you could do what the sensible people have suggested
 
#11
Same as Jack, filled the two lads in, smashed their house up, got arrested, did think maybe this was the wrong way to go about things, found out it wasnt really.

Got a caution instead of court for abh and crim damage :) However it could have gone to court, except they made up some stuff, and i was at work when i was supposed to have done it :)

They moved shortly after.

So sometimes a kicking works.
 
#12
1)Make sure there are no witnesses.

2)Stab him; if at all possible go for the jugular/carotiod, bracchilian or femoral.

3)Cut yourself, preferrably on the wrist/forearm(so it looks like a defensive wound).

4)Call 999.

5)Tell Plod the guy attacked you with a knife and, in the struggle, he was killed.

Job done! :wink: :twisted:
 
#13
crow_bag said:
Get some mates round a few nights until said chod kicks off. Then, head to his flat knock on his door and politely inquire to his well being.

If he keeps being a chod, he could alwasy trip while walking down a dark alley, it's ver dangerous out at nights these days.

Or you could do what the sensible people have suggested
You're lucky you weren't in the Traf the day it happened or you would have stomped around to my house with the rest of us!
 
T

Tremaine

Guest
#14
:D Thanks to all, really feel for him as he's a decent bloke, like his Missus . Shame he's been lumbered with a class one cnut though.
Phoned him and said keep a Diary, as was suggested. And if only we really could fill the tw@t in eh? Thanks a lot for the replies so far. :D

Edited because I made his missus out to be a bloke , first time 8O
 
Z

Zarathustra

Guest
#15
jack-daniels said:
crow_bag said:
Get some mates round a few nights until said chod kicks off. Then, head to his flat knock on his door and politely inquire to his well being.

If he keeps being a chod, he could alwasy trip while walking down a dark alley, it's ver dangerous out at nights these days.

Or you could do what the sensible people have suggested
You're lucky you weren't in the Traf the day it happened or you would have stomped around to my house with the rest of us!
It's not night in the 'shot if there isn't a bit of the old ultra violence
 
T

Tremaine

Guest
#16
Biscuits_AB said:
Tremaine said:
Real antisocial behaviour and chances are his safety's on the line somewhere, eventually. Only last week the chod upstairs leaned out of the upstairs window and called out to him "what you farkin looking at you little cnut?" ...........

What to do? call Plod, or fill the tw@t in, or just stag on :?
Maybe best giving option 2 a miss then eh?
Not, if said Chod is introduced to a fookin great Spanner :x
 
#17
I have to go with Prince Albert... I reckon a massive bezzering will do the trick. Invite him round for an evening of unlimited cheap Stella to watch a match, then you can "bond" with him while you get the rollmats ready in the background, once he's toasted get naked and get them rollmats on, and invite him to a late evening pugilism session sans clothes. It may be erotic in the way that Ollie Reed did in that film where he wrestled by the fire.....
But if he gets funny at this point, just attack. Have a claw hammer ready just in case.

If things really go Pete Tong, take your cues from "American Psycho" and have a woodcutter's axe ready, along with a see through rain mac, and a floor covered in newspaper.

Try getting your reservations at Dorsia now, you stupid bastard.
 
#18
He should keep on at the landlord, if it's social housing then they've got a policy on anti-social housing. If they've got a policy, he's got them by the short hairs. LINK

Also, he should keep a diary, keep reporting incidents to the police -regardless of how little result he gets - and get himself down the doctor for a psychiatric referral, to start building evidence of how badly he's being effected by this.

The bad guys don't always win, it just takes time to stir the authorities into action. Of course, it helps if one of their kids deliberately sets fire to communal property.
 
#19
Mugatu2 said:
I have to go with Price Albert... I reckon a massive bezzering will do the trick. Invite him round for an evening of unlimited cheap Stella to watch a match, then you can "bond" with him while you get the rollmats ready in the background, once he's toasted get naked and get them rollmats on, and invite him to a late evening pugilism session sans clothes. It may be erotic in the way that Ollie Reed did in that film where he wrestled by the fire.....
But if he gets funny at this point, just attack. Have a claw hammer ready just in case.

If things really go Pete Tong, take your cues from "American Psycho" and have a woodcutter's axe ready, along with a see through rain mac, and a floor covered in newspaper.

Try getting your reservations at Dorsia now, you stupid bastard.
like your style :D
 
#20
I would suggest paying a couple of quid to a Polish sniper, and getting him to take the fecker out from atop the block of flats down the road. Either that or bezzer him up with some Red Bull and cyanide, cut him up then put the body parts in a freezer in the attic. Then move house, adopt a strange foreign accent and a pronounced limp.
 

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