Marriage Guidance Required

Discussion in 'The ARRSE Hole' started by diehard57, May 18, 2006.

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  1. I was cleaning the loft out with Mrs Diehards57 the other day - filthy dirty, smelly, covered in cobwebs - but she's good with the kids - and it made me think................

    We will celebrate our Silver Wedding anniversary next year.

    The padre that manacled us together 25 years ago got me to agree 'for better or for worse'.

    Now my question is.......................I've had lots of the bleeding worse - when does it start getting better?
  2. Erm......... he lied - it doesn't :(
  3. 25 years?

    warranty has expired... time to trade up for a newer model, unless, of course, there is that ' small print ' clause in the agreement you forgot or overlooked to read..

    maybe she's left you big bucks as her beneficiary and she might slip lugging stuff from the attic and suffer a sad accident?

    or, you could cash in those stocks, take her to the clinic and have her reworked with some upgrades and ' detailing ' if you've a mind to keep her or the kids protest the other options too much... some ' enhanced accessories ' , sanding down and refinish with a good coat of paint and she'll ride like new...last another 25, if you're lucky...
  4. It gets better when you die.
  5. That is what she is waiting for
  6. has she started buying the autotrader yet? looking for the Merc SLK and dying her hair blonde??? :D :D
  7. If she still blows instead of wonder your life is miserable.... :crying:
  8. fake death
    give your hand a wig and some lipstick
  9. remember this......

    "inside every good woman there's a b&stard trying to get out".......................

    they cant help themselves, when she does finally take you to the cleaners dont be bitter, its just the way they are.

    I'm not being flippant, its true. I know. oh yes, I know...........................
  10. 25 years!!!!! You only get 15 for murder FFS
  11. Be careful what you wish for. Look at McCartney. Married for ?? years, missus has 1 veggie pasty too many, pops her clogs. He ends up with a 1 legged g**d d*gger and possible deep sh1t money wise.
    27 years wed, and if I'd topped her when we met, I'd have been out on parole after 5 years