Stop me if you've heard this one, but Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says,
"Where in the hell have you been?"
Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo"
"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head
in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred
dollar bill tattooed on his dick?"
"Well, for one, I like to watch my money grow. Two, once in a
while I like to play with my money. Three, I like how money
feels in my hand. And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping,
you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."