Manchester United FC

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer walks into a Bank to cash a cheque. As he approaches the cashier he says, "Good morning, Ms could you please cash this cheque for me?"
Cashier:"It would be my pleasure. Could you please show me your ID?"
Solskjaer:"Truthfully, I did not bring my ID with me as I didn't think there was any need to. I am Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, Manager of Manchester United”.
Cashier: "Yes, I know who you are, but with all the regulations and monitoring of the banks because of impostors and forgers and requirements of the legislation, etc., I must insist on seeing ID."
Solskjaer: Just ask anyone here at the bank who I am and they will tell you. Everybody knows who I am."
Cashier: "I am sorry, Mr Solskjaer but these are the bank rules and I must follow them."
Solskjaer,"Come on please, I am urging you, please cash this cheque."
Cashier: "Look sir, here is an example of what we can do. One day, Tiger Woods came into the bank without ID. To prove he was Tiger Woods he pulled out his putter and made a beautiful shot across the bank into a cup. With that shot we knew him to be Tiger Woods and cashed his cheque."
"Another time, Andre Agassi came in without ID. He pulled out his tennis racket and made a fabulous shot where the tennis ball landed in my cup. With that shot we cashed his cheque. So, sir, what can you do to prove that it is you and only you?"
Solskjaer stands there thinking and thinking and finally says, "Honestly, my mind is a total blank...there is nothing that comes to my mind. I can't think of a single thing. I have absolutely no idea what to do. I don't have a clue."
Cashier: "Will that be large or small notes , Mr Solskjaer?”
 
Love Jurgen's response to alleged approach for manager's job year's ago.....'Old Trafford, like Disneyland for adults.' Don't think it was a compliment.
 
Love Jurgen's response to alleged approach for manager's job year's ago.....'Old Trafford, like Disneyland for adults.' Don't think it was a compliment.

Klopp didn't say that...that was the line used by Woodward to try and entice him to Old Trafford, Klopp didn't feel it was sexy enough, apparently? Whilst I understand you're all very giddy about your result on Sunday, you cnuts really need to stop trying to rewrite history or push false narratives. Rather like the shit referring to Fergie being gone if he didn't get a win over the tricky trees, it simply isn't true.

The maestro was safe due to the obscene amount of work he did in the background to rebuild the club from root to branch. Of course the famous photo put up a few posts back, appeared to signify fan discontent, but even that was a paltry few malcontents who soon disappeared into embarrassed obscurity when it became apparent to them what was actually going on behind the scenes.
 
Klopp didn't say that...that was the line used by Woodward to try and entice him to Old Trafford, Klopp didn't feel it was sexy enough, apparently? Whilst I understand you're all very giddy about your result on Sunday, you cnuts really need to stop trying to rewrite history or push false narratives. Rather like the shit referring to Fergie being gone if he didn't get a win over the tricky trees, it simply isn't true.

The maestro was safe due to the obscene amount of work he did in the background to rebuild the club from root to branch. Of course the famous photo put up a few posts back, appeared to signify fan discontent, but even that was a paltry few malcontents who soon disappeared into embarrassed obscurity when it became apparent to them what was actually going on behind the scenes.
Even funnier if it came from Woodward. When you are in a hole, stop digging.
 
Even funnier if it came from Woodward. When you are in a hole, stop digging.

Just reminding you of who made the actual quote, rather than the one you made up...no digging tools needed.
 
I’m more interested in the damage he is now doing to the club and players than his past days as a player.

Commentary from the likes of Gary Neville says OGS has done a lot for the club.
 
Haha Foden just missed his penalty in the shoot out. Chuffed to fcuk, can't stand the arrogant simple looking twat...

ETA To add: Citeh are out. Foden ha..
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
Commentary from the likes of Gary Neville says OGS has done a lot for the club.
He doesn’t want to upset his mate.

He‘s not my mate so I tell it from the eyes of a fan and supporter whose supported the club since the 60’s. To sum up as you said the other day, GN has gone all soft in the head and wbible.
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
Love Jurgen's response to alleged approach for manager's job year's ago.....'Old Trafford, like Disneyland for adults.' Don't think it was a compliment.
And look at the one you let go. I think we had the last laugh there. God bless him.

 
He doesn’t want to upset his mate.

He‘s not my mate so I tell it from the eyes of a fan and supporter whose supported the club since the 60’s. To sum up as you said the other day, GN has gone all soft in the head and wbible.

It’s not just him. Others have said it. OK, he may not have the ability to compete with the likes of Kloppy and pep, but that shouldn’t detract what he may have done positively.
 
Commentary from the likes of Gary Neville says OGS has done a lot for the club.

I wish these people would stop talking of "done a lot for the club" without going on to explain exactly what has been done. We need a more Paxman like host who would never let such an aimless comment go unchecked. Same for "we need to find out spark", "we need to look at that" and so on. Nothing ever gets challenged and with the current state of play that has never been needed more.

I can't imagine a job end of year performance review being like that; "Let's have a look at how well you met your objectives, can you give me some examples?", "I've done a lot for the company", "Wow, that's really impressive, here's a big rise and top bonus to go with it for doing so much". "Thanks, same again next year boss?", "Sure, why not".
 
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Yes, a big mistake there, for sure.
 
I wish these people would stop talking of "done a lot for the club" without going on to explain exactly what has been done. We need a more Paxman like host who would never let such an aimless comment go unchecked. Same for "we need to find out spark", "we need to look at that" and so on. Nothing ever gets challenged and with the current state of play that has never been needed more.

I can't imagine a job end of year performance review being like that; "Let's have a look at how well you met your objectives, can you give me some examples?", "I've done a lot for the company", "Wow, that's really impressive, here's a big rise and top bonus to go with it for doing so much". "Thanks, same again next year boss?", "Sure, why not".

If you can’t see how much OGS has done for other clubs in the PL then you are blind. ;-)
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
It’s not just him. Others have said it. OK, he may not have the ability to compete with the likes of Kloppy and pep, but that shouldn’t detract what he may have done positively.
From your point of view maybe;-)
 
It’s all Ronaldo’s fault.


Poor Ole, being the scapegoat.
 

Gout Man

LE
Book Reviewer
It’s all Ronaldo’s fault.


Poor Ole, being the scapegoat.
Poor Olle my arse, a great bunch of players who are sent out to play schoolboy football by some one who shouldn't be in charge.
The players just do enough to keep him in a job because he‘s everyone’s mate, doesn’t want to upset anyone, thus “the happy atmosphere“ in the club, wouldn’t surprise me if we have a convincing win against Spurs then it will be another heavy defeat against City but that’s City and Pep so it doesn’t matter and the Liverpool result will be conveniently forgotten by then, and the death by a thousand cuts continues.
With this all going on people can be forgiven for forgetting that Woodward is leaving at the end of the year, from what I have read I don’t see much of a change happening.

Will Solskjaer be kept till Woodward goes? If I was a betting man and knowing how this club is ran I would say maybe. Will Solskjaer be here for the rest of the season? Probably and then the powers can sit down and look at who has done what in the world of football.
An almighty push for Ten Hag perhaps? Maybe. People say Conte isn’t the man for Man Utd, why? Look how he got Lukaku firing on all cylinders something our wonderful Solskjaer couldn’t do.
Whatever the future holds I just hope the club learns from this fiasco, we need a head coach who has complete control of all ins and outs. By that I mean it’s him who decides who comes, if that player is too expensive then he decides who the back up is not some fecking shiny arse and if any player takes the piss he’s out just like Stam, Ince and Keane, no player is to big and the manager should be allowed to get rid, the players will respect that as proved in the past.
Personally I’d go for Conte with the above caveats even if he stays for just three years he will in that time get a team on that pitch that will win trophies and be in a far better place for another chap to take over.
 
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