Feeling tired, lazy and uninterested in much yesterday I sat flicking through the computer, glancing at smut, making myself trump so that the trapped air made my sack vibrate and twitch I opted to treat myself to a sly one off the wrist. Not a particularly eventful polish, but climax was reached all over my desk. Being bone idle I couldn't be bothered to go the twenty or thirty paces to the trumping pot to get some bog roll, so I leant over and used a T shirt that was sat on the side as a spu_nk mop, there was a fair bit and the absorbency of the t shirt wasn't as good as kleenex so it took a while longer. The t shirt was lobbed on the side to be disposed of later, and I had a quick nod off in the chair. The gate buzzed, waking me up with a stream of slavver and some dried crust from the aftermath of my thrap having seeped through the front of my shorts. I didn't want to go to the gate without a top on so I thoughtlessly grabbed my t shirt and pulled it on, realising my mistake when I pulled 50 minute old harry monk all down the front of my face when I put the shirt on. It stank, went all over my nose, chops and lips.......... It grossed me out but as I walked towards the gate I giggled thinking 'I wonder if the citylink driver knows I'm caked in c u m' Has anyone else inadvertently smeared their own heads in semen, then had a crafty taste while signing for a parcel.