Made up words.

Discussion in 'Staff College and Staff Officers' started by BedIn, Jan 15, 2002.

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  1. My favourite thing on JDSC was having my written work marked by a non-grad Welbexian.

    They would merrily pour criticism on being too "wordy" (like Shakespeare - that rambling fool) whilst happily chucking round words like "attrit," "jointery" and "simultineity."

    Mind you, they did have A levels in wiring from a very special school which had equipped them with a wealth of life skills.
  2. My favourite made up word has to be ampibiosity - presumably meaning the extent to which something is amphibious. I would argue that perhaps the word should be amphibiousness however it does lead to a whole host of other possibilities such as attackability and defensiveness. Anyone got any other suggestions for budding staff officers?
    Oh my other favourite piece of jargon has to be the littoral battlespace when what they mean is a beach!!
  3. An occasional source of amusement has been OR's using verbs incorrectly eg "Gentlemen, the flag donates the headquarters....." or bastardisation of words such as "...irregardless of that Sir..."
  4. Ah!  Malapropisms, my favourite.  You must be psychotic or something because I was just thinking about these.  Best exponents are C/Sgt Instructors at Sandhurst e.g. "Sir, you have got access threads on your uniform."
  5. Take them out!
  6. Without parallel in the field of military tongue twisters are the problems caused by the word collimator.  Respect to the chap who named it.  It could so easily have been called a "device, bore-sighting, hand-held" or some such thing.  Thanks to him we are entertained by hearing it called a "culminator" or "colliminator" etc ad nauseam.
  7. With regards to terrible jargon - lets discuss "fighting the Warrior."  I would suggest you'd get further fighting WITH the Warrior.  Or maybe I'm missing the point....

    With regards to OR stuff, "Sir, lets be pacific."
  8. When patrolling in NI keep an eye open for the "muriels" painted on the walls.
  9. Watch out for 'performas' too.  Just when you think you're about to meet the Corrs, you have to get your bloody pen out.
  10. Yup, life's a littoral battlefield
  11. I was dozing through a mil tech lecture many moons ago and caught the term "Hoop Stress" - anyone enlighen me or should it be left well alone?
  12. A great word which caused much merryment was "knobology" the ergonomics of nobs!
  13. I would have to include the word 'wibble' as a particular favourite, most certainly made up and much used by the lads.
  14. I was at an O' Gp when the COS talked about battlefield elephants (meaning elements) causing much amusement and endless references to Hannibal, etc
  15. Slightly off thread, but sort of in the same vein; was at a parade once, lots of OTC types trying to look smart for a GOC Southern District who wanders along the line asking them what thy're studying.  One merrily pipes up "Cartography, Sir."  To which the exalted one replies "Ah, so, you want to become a heart surgeon, eh ?"   At least the OCdt had the presence of mind to answer "Er, yes, Sir".