Lovers Lanes

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by HarryPalmer, Apr 16, 2008.

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  1. Ever had a problem with civvies happening on a secluded military training area at night and deciding that its a good spot for a shag, usually in full view of a crowd of perverts with NVE?

    Once there was a rifle range in the middle of the Irish midlands that was like a magnet for courting couples.

    It was occasionally patrolled by an infantry section in two landrovers, who would usually pull up on a hill above the area, switch off engine and headlights, then roll silently downhill while the dismounted infantry jogged alongside. They`d roll into the range area, locate a civvy car with steamed up windows and nearly crash into it before switching on headlights and gunning the engines. The lads would then surround the car`pounding on the roof and bellowing:
    "What are you up to in there? Nothing eh? Shove over then and give us a go!"

    Decision then on whether to run away or not, depending on which was funnier......
  2. 3 mile bottom (or words to those effect!) Near Stanta. Dogging spot or erm, cough cough, so i'm told.....
  3. I once shagged a bird on a Lovers Lane next to the M1. Banging her over the bonnet while gawking traffic whizzed by - awesome.

    ..Well, it was for the 30 seconds I lasted.
  4. Best one I did in my braver days was right next to the Berlin wall at Gatow.
  5. A certain parking spot on the south shore of Lough Neagh was always very good.

    Tandragee had a good few spots over the weekend nights also.
  6. haha! I actually cant stop laughing at the top response! Classic!
  7. You did it twice eh? I'm impressed! :wink:
  8. Got a load of cadets to ambush a "rocking" car on (B)Leek training area once. Most amusing!
  9. This couple once parked up right in front of us on Stanta, it didn't last long and it was amusing us, but when the guy got out to have a post-coital slash and wandered over to us, I just said " I wouldn't do that if I were you mate!" this was combined with the sight of several armed 'bushes' standing up, he falls over backwards, scrambling for the car with his GF screaming hysterically! Wonder if the poor bloke can ever get a hard-on again after that trauma!
  10. Switched on newly installed infra -red kit while parked up in Cent on banks of River Weser in '65.We noticed a car pulling up no other side of river and zeroed in on it-interesting.
  11. Car park at Belfast castle, nuff said :) :)
  12. Abandoned Paramali Village near Episkopi Garrison, Cyprus. That was me with my now wife stripped naked and shagging all around the ruins. Minutes after we got dressed, post our afternoon session in the sun, an officer came along walking his dog. :D
  13. My section frightened the life out of an amorous pair in a steamed up car on Catterick TA in the late 70's.

    Also saw a car hanging over the edge of one of the old gun battery positions overlooking Lathbury barracks in Gibraltar. Apparently the bloke had been banging away and accidentally knocked the handbrake off. The slope on the concrete glacis was just enough to cause the car to roll down and drop the rear wheels over the edge....with a 50' drop below.

    Also in Gib the local romeos would park their cars down by our MQs, often under the balconies of our block of flats. The Cpl in the flat above mine had a bag of gravel, and he'd sit on his balcony dropping bits of gravel on the car roof at random intervals. They'd usually p*ss off after a few minutes of stones pinging off their car roof...

    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

  14. Similar experience to first post, in the wee car park behind Thiepval Barracks in Lisburn. A small lake with car park which was a bonking magnet... Some even used to "come" there from as far afield as Newry!

    Same stuff, Land Rover in neutral etc etc...

    Back in the days of the Cold War, I was driving a Range Rover deep in a Polish forest, looking for a suitable place to bivvy up overnight... It was gloomy, but just enough light to see, so we had all our lights off (including the brake lights - another good ruse for messing around with "followers") and were creeping along in low gear. Coming out into a clearing, ahead of us on the track was one of these things:

    It was rocking away like a cross-Channel ferry in a Force 10, with legs and other bits seemingly poking out of every window/door!

    We decided to give up on the stealth, gunned the 3.5l engine and flicked on our very impressive front light clusters! Much screaming, flying clothes and loud cursing... Must have been on the vinegar strokes... :twisted:
  15. 0700 one summer morning in the early 80's on SPTA. Two 4 tonners negotiated the track along a strip wood the extended some half mile from the road. Upon coming to a halt and debussing the 40 odd troops notice an estate car parked about 50 yards away and a Border Collie sat dutifully nearby. It becomes apparent that nuptials are taking place when a pair of female legs shot up from below the rear windows and a cacophony of female screams and male grunts emanated from said vehicle.

    When the noise quietened down the lads started a very appreciative round of applause which reached a crescendo when the blond lady's head peeked through the window and the screaming began. The applause continued through the frenzied activity of the two getting dressed and trying to crawl back into the front seat without being seen. Having spectacularly failed to do so she attempted to hide in the footwell of the passenger side as he tried to negotiate the rutted track at Formula one speeds.

    We watched as the vehicle turned onto the road and acceleratedaway triumphantly. Suddenly the brake lights came on... most probably at about the same time another light bulb came on... Fido!!!! Oh Sh1t!!! The car came to a halt and turned around to come back for the pooch.

    Now... Border Collies are pretty smart dogs and this one was no exception. He knew damn well that he had just been thrown from the train and, when given the choice of being fed by those nice soldiers or running 300 yards to the chap who was now calling him to save embarrassment he was smart enough to stay with the troops. He continued to do so from 200 yards, 100 and fifty and, I must say, was one of the most obedient dogs I ever came across because he "heeled" and "stayed" right up until the car came alongside and the door was opened for him... Right through the "gauntlet" of 40 troops clapping, cat-calling and rating the performance...

    Now that's a walk of shame... :lol: