Lonely Hearts

Discussion in 'Lonely Hearts' started by Forces_Sweetheart, Feb 14, 2007.

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  1. Classic Irish Lonely Hearts ads...just received by email from an Irish friend...

    Heavy drinker, 35, Cork area. Seeks gorgeous sex addict interested in a man who loves his pints, cigarettes, Glasgow Celtic Football Club and has been known to start fights on Patrick Street at three o'clock in the morning.
    -------------------------------
    Bitter, disillusioned Dublin man, lately rejected by longtime fiance, seeks
    decent, honest, reliable woman, if such a thing still exists in this cruel
    world of hatchet-faced bitches.
    ------------------------
    Ginger haired Galway man, a troublemaker, gets slit-eyed and shitty after a few scoops, seeks attractive, wealthy lady for bail purposes, maybe more.
    -------- ------------------
    Bad tempered, foul-mouthed old bastard, living in a damp cottage in the arse end of Roscommon, seeks attractive 21 year old blonde lady, with a lovely chest.
    --------------------------
    Limerick man, 27, medium build, brown hair, blue eyes, seeks alibi for the night of February 27 between 8 PM and 11:30 PM.
    --------------------------
    Optimistic Mayo man, 35, seeks a blonde 20 year old double-jointed super model, who owns her own brewery, and has an open-minded twin sister.
     
  2. :frustrated: are you nuts :shakefist:
     
  3. Gremlin

    Gremlin LE Good Egg (charities)

    So which ione did it for you then F_S?? :)
     
  4. And your choice FS..........?
     
  5. With my hatchet-face? Number two Cilla.
     
  6. Made me chuckle! Thanks!

    Litotes
     
  7. Ergo you are honest and reliable?
     
  8. Noooo - am a hatchet-faced moose who will confirm his worst fears and cynicism about the opposite sex.
     
  9. Could be worse at least you not cruel!
     
  10. Haha loving those lonely hearts adds xxx
     
  11. Er....did I marry you some years ago?