Little Johnny - again

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by happybonzo, Sep 13, 2010.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Little Johnny is sitting in class one day when the teacher says, "I'm going to give you a letter of the alphabet and you need to give me a word that starts with that letter and use it in a sentence. OK, Let's start with A"
    Little Johnny raises his hand and shouts, "Teacher! Pick me! Pick me!" The teacher thinks to herself, "I know what he's going to say."
    So she calls on another student. Next, the teacher asks for the letters B,C, and D. and each time Little Johnny raises his hand the teacher ignores him and calls on other students. This continues until she reaches the letter U.
    By this time Little Johnny is almost jumping out of his seat. The teacher can't really think of a bad word that starts with that letter. So she calls on him.
    "U-R-I-N-A-T-E, urinate." The teacher rolls her eyes and says, "OK, now use it in a sentence."
    Little Johnny responds, "Urinate, but if you had bigger tits you would be a ten."
  2. Additions to the Little Johnny collection always appreciated. :D
  3. Little Johnny answered first. "I want to start out as an S.B.S. officer, go to the Middle East and kill loads of militant Bad Guys, return as a national hero. Then I'd become a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest nymphomaniac tart, give her a Ferrari, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while banging her like a loose screen door in a hurricane."

    The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with this unfortunate response from little Johnny, decided not to acknowledge what he had said and simply tried to continue with the lesson.
    "And how about you, Sarah, what or who would you like to be?"
    "I want to be Johnny’s tart!"
    • Like Like x 1
  4. You missed the part where the teacher asks them what they want to be when they grow up.
  5. Cold_Collation

    Cold_Collation LE Book Reviewer

    It's because he's SBS - trained to get in without people noticing.
    • Funny Funny x 1