Lines To Propose To Someone


He He just thought what are some of the best lines to say to someone you like after alcohol binge ?
More cheap the better !
Does your mum take it up the gritter?


Book Reviewer
mastram said:
He He just thought what are some of the best lines to say to someone you like after alcohol binge ?
More cheap the better !

Try this one : "If I was to propose to you, what would you say?".

When she answers tell her, "In that case I won't fucking bother".

Works every time.


I like your balls
I mean your basketballs


Book Reviewer
I know it,s a Company Smoker and your the CSm,s wife, but do you fancy a shag marm
I was in the middle of a field somewhere writing a letter to my girlfriend, it went like this.
I know I have been here a while and this is the first letter. I am being sent abroad next year so seeing as I am crap at writing we better get married.
I blame the Carlsberg.
Shhhh, let's not turn this rape into a murder?

Be quiet or I'll kill your kids.
Look love, all the nice ones have left and I've been buying you drinks all night. Come back to mine tonight, we'll have a couple of hours of horrible sordid activity and we'll both feel slightly guilty that we know it'll never lead to a long and bountiful relationship like the one we've craved since our first loves jilted us. In the morning we'll have an awkward chat over cornflakes, I'll ring you a taxi, peck you on the cheek and say goodbye. We won't trade numbers, but that's alright, we wouldn't have called each other if we did. During the next day I'll feel a bit sh*t because I can't remember your last name, and you'll send a text complaining about "Men" to one of your best mates. In a couple of weeks we'll both go out again, we may bump into each other, we may not. Inevitabilty I'll go back to my house with another girl, just like you, and you'll be taken back to someone else's house, and he'll be similar to me. The cycle will continue until we realise that really this life is not going to get us anywhere, but by then it'll be too late. So in reality, it's insignificant whether we sleep together tonight or not, it won't change anything, we won't get married and we won't live happily ever after. However I've got Cheerios at home so that's got to sway it.

Bright, cheery, makes 'em laugh. Winner line, guaranteed.
You're ugly, but I'm randy. It's the best offer you're going to get tonight so give me a shout when you've got your coat.


"Whats your bedroom ceiling like?"
When they reply "Why?"
Reply with "Just wanted to know, as I'll be staring at it later tonight."
Say it with a smile & a cheeky grin, & it does work.


can i buy you a drink? or would you just like the money?


You- "Will you marry me?"

Your Bitch- "You must be joking!"

You- "I think you must have misheard me, what i actually said was, you look f ucking fat in that dress" :p
My classic was with the first Mrs Reni,
after it took me six weeks to get her into bed I inexplicably felt the need to comment on her 'abnormally large vaginal lips' whilst going down on her in the morning, I didnt actually mean it to come out how it did, it was merely an observation that I murmured up at her over her pubis, this resulted in 'lights off, curtains closed' antics for a couple of years and when I saw her in Leeds last month she said that at the time I had utterly devestated her confidence !
Bit sensitive if you ask me, my c*ck looks like it was put together by a crazy scientist in a Transylvanian lab but you dont see me weeping !

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