Letting a girl down gently

Discussion in 'Lonely Hearts' started by viceroy, May 2, 2013.

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  1. Is there such a thing? Rip away, it's a while I have not posted and there is a reason for that...

    Before you tell me to smash her back doors in and wipe my cock on her curtains, that has already happened...

  2. hotel_california

    hotel_california LE Book Reviewer

    Does she have a younger, prettier sister?
  3. Congratulations
  4. Kill her and ensure the body will never be found. You also get the benefit of subsequent sympathy lays.
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  5. Depends if she's a bunny boiling psychopath. Although to be fair, most are anyway.

    Why gently?

    Invite her for a drink and when she comes in make sure you're tonguing the latest squeeze at the bar. The emotional outburst and eventual bitchfight will be the talk of the town for years which may (or may not) lead to her eventual sucicide from sustained ridicule

    Or alternatively she may break into your gaff and cut your cock off. It's your choice!
  6. There's no need for unpleasantness. Simply sit her down and explain that you're unable to continue a relationship with a woman whose curtains are minging.
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  7. Tell her she needs to go down to the STD clinic because you believe you may have caught something off her mother.
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  8. TheresaMay

    TheresaMay LE Moderator DirtyBAT

    Trust me - the gently approach does NOT work. Allow me to indulge you in a short tale...

    Her name was Nicki from somewhere between Birmingham & Worcester. We’d previously met at a party in the mainland during my last posting to NI. We’d kept in touch as my posting was soon coming to an end, and once I was posted back to the mainland I figured I’d need some entertainment during those long weekends ahead. What better way to have a ready-made sex-buddy on tap, who lives miles away from anywhere or anyone I knew? Guilt-free rattling lay in wait…

    On my final day I’d arranged to swing by her place on my way daaan Sarf for a little parallel parking. I’d not long separated from my wife at the time so was looking forward to some rebound activities whilst under the confident assurance that the divorce was in the post, courtesy of her legal aid. Life was good.

    On arrival I was greeted by a very dressed-up, over-excited MILF who, after weeks of building up flirting stories, ideas and naughty convos on the dog and bone, had seemingly been looking forward to this encounter even more than I had.

    After spending a good few hours at her place, I can honestly say I left feeling totally exhausted and quite smug with myself – especially because I knew that she’d had some of my best moves which had previously been lying dormant in a loveless marriage until now. We parted on the understanding we’d keep in touch – neither one of us looking to jump straight into another relationship for the time being (she was in a similar boat to me on that front); looking ahead to the weekends to come.

    No sooner was I on the M5 when boom! The texts started flooding in. Initially they were the flirty ones, “cant wait til next weekend” etc. And before I’d even started un-boxing my belongings and sorting out my new room in the mess, “Are you thinking about me?” and “I’ve never felt like this before”. Oh dear.

    Within 24 hours, I had an amber “Relationship” caption flashing, so it was time to act. I kept reminding her of our ‘just for fun’ arrangement – and even asked her things like “so – you going hunting for a decent guy this weekend then?” …to which she would not take the hint and respond by saying stuff like “I’ve already found him”. This was Day Two.


    By Day 4 she was finally starting to come round to the idea that I was a little scared off at this point. Her comments about me meeting her folks and telling her kids all about me, hadn’t gone down too well. Day 4 ended by her telling me she’s pregnant and will have to get an abortion so I hope I’m proud of myself.

    By Day 6 came the insults that I’d ‘used her’. Funny, I thought we’d ‘used each other’.

    By Day 7 I threw my phone in the lake. It was a ******* PAYG anyway. I went to town that following weekend, bought a new phone, a jazz-mag, 3 DVDs and locked myself away until Monday morning.


    There is no easy way to let a woman down. And I imagine it’s the same for a woman letting a guy down too. Either be firm from the start, or just keep it in your pants. Anything in between will simply give the other person that little glimmer of hope and blind them from the obviousness of the truth!

    She was cracking in the pit mind – almost worth the hassle!
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  9. Most people on here would kill for a relationship like that!!
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  10. You dont let them down gently! Tell them to fcuk off if you dont like them because they do the same to men so it is a war between male and female that began when eve ate the apple.
  11. TheresaMay

    TheresaMay LE Moderator DirtyBAT

    As I was reading that back to myself, I was trying to remember her last name so I could 'Facebook her' and see if she's still about!

    If I was single I mean.

  12. Agreed. Last time I dumped a Dorris I tried to do everything correctly - face-to-face, etc.

    She still ended up having a panic attack and spending the next few months trying to **** my life up. Snakes with tits, the lot of 'em.
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  13. "somewhere between Birmingham & Worcester." That would be Kidderminster then? And her name is Nicki? Narrows it down a bit. Anything else PM me, there's a good chap....
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  14. Anyone struggling to get rid of bunny boilers deserves everything that comes their way. Well, assuming they've given the bird in question their real name of course...
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  15. Thanks chaps, some sensible advise and artsy photography. Never easy after the dreaded 'L' word was uttered but I guess I have to bite the bullet, may be on last dip...
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