LETTER TO THE GOVERNMENT

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by BanjoBill, Apr 20, 2008.

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  1. Dear Labour Gov

    I have just been watching Countryfile and have found it necessary to cut my viewing short in order to announce this most alarming information - which must be both a shock to you and an oversight.

    One of the presenters was visiting Cumbria to 'Bag A Few Tarns'. I was shocked to discover that there are NO rules for the bagging of Tarns. I therefore suggest that a committee is urgently set up with the function of deciding the membership for the rules of creating a new governing board (a new think tank), their job will be to come up with a set of rules for the 'bagging of tarns'. Ultimately I think in will be important that a new ministerial position is implemented to oversee the governing board - followed by once monthly sessions with the PM.

    My suggested budget for the new committee & governing board & MP should be kept a close guarded secret, as should also all the expenses incurred by the new MP.

    What kind of country is this where people can just make up their own rules about bagging a tarn.

    Thank you in advance - I am sure you will be able to convince everyone that Britain needs more laws like this.

    Your sincerely
    Bill
     
  2. WTF is baggin a tarn??
     
  3. My point proven... there are no rules and therefore the whole situation is ambiguous to say the least.
     
  4. right let's march on it! sod the letter lets turn over cars and burn stuff!
     
  5. You are very bored arn't you Bill
     
  6. It's alright you taking the p1ss mate... Britain would not be where it is today without a new 'Labour' law every few minutes. :D
     
  7. Good Lord Banjo....I was just watching that......thought, Twat, you can't go lobbing stones about like some aquatic freedom fighter, 'bagging tarns' more like anarchy if you ask me!!

    I think he needs stoning....although to be truthful it was the whiskey distillery just up the road from me I was more interested in!! first batch this Christmas! woho!
     
  8. Thank you for your support. It can only be an oversight... I'm certain once the gibberment find out there are no laws or rules about this... they'll be on to it.

    In the meantime - your avatar: Is that your Arrse?
     
  9. PERSEC.....can't say!
     
  10. brilliant bill.
     
  11. I'm with you Bill. Let's set up a couple of Anti-Bagger patrols and start the cull.

    I bet they're bloody "townies" with their flasks and their "Carbon-Fibre Walking Poles" and their Gaiters and their ugly wives.

    Shoot them all, shoot them I say and we'll......Pardon?........Yes Matron I'll turn it off right now..................
     
  12. Will this law apply to Monroe's north of the border or will separate legislation have to be enforced?
     
  13. I (and probably every other poster on this thread) have just Googled it, and find myself slightly underwhelmed. I was hoping it involved hunting, or at least some form of bondage. Ah well.

    Even so, laws are needed for everything. If people don't have rules to abide by, they get confused and aggressive and start burning things.

    I would suggest, to get us started, that a Tarn Bagging tax be brought into effect, paid for annually and tattooed onto the arrsecheeks of the Bagger. When this 'sport' becomes more popular, we can set up a congestion charge around the lakes which receive the most human traffic, with the rates calculated by the weight of the walker (including poles and rucksack)

    For those opposed to this hobby (the Anti-Baggers) a special fund could be set up to provide accommodation, rifles, traps and poisons. Possibly funded by the National Lottery.
     
  14. I missed the programme and I'm gutted. Just how big was the bag they used to hold this mountain lake? Must have been a monster, with all sorts of Health and Safety issues.

    I can see the need for legislation.
     
  15. BiscuitsAB

    BiscuitsAB LE Moderator

    and what about lochens!