Letter home

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by OKCHU, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Dear Mum & Dad,

    Our Scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and are worried. We are okay. Only one of our tents and 2 sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up on the moors looking for Adrian when it happened.

    Oh yes, please call Adrians mum and tell her he is okay. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and rescue Land Rovers. It was great. We never would have found Adrian in the dark if it hadn't been for the lightning.

    Scoutmaster Ted got mad at Adrian for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Adrian said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that if you put petrol on a fire, the petrol will blow up? The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did and also some of our clothes. Matthew is going to look weird until his hair and eyebrows grow back.

    We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Ted gets the bus fixed. It wasn't his fault about the crash. The brakes worked okay when we left. Scoutmaster Ted said that with a bus that old, you have to expect something to break down; that's probably why he can't get MOT or insurance.

    We think it's a cool bus. He doesn't care if we get it dirty, and if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the bumpers. It gets pretty hot with 45 scouts in a bus made for 24. He even let us take turns riding in the trailer until the traffic policeman stopped and talked to us.

    Scoutmaster Ted is a cool guy. Don't worry, he is a good driver. In fact, he is teaching Gary how to drive on the winding Peak District moorland roads where there aren't any cops. All we ever see up there are huge quarry trucks.

    This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and swimming out to the rapids. Scoutmaster Ted wouldn't let me because I can't swim, and Adrian was afraid he would sink because of his cast (it's concrete because we didn't have any plaster), so he let us take the canoe out.. It was great. You can still see some of the trees under the water from the flood.

    Scoutmaster Ted isn't pants like some scoutmasters. He didn't even get mad about the life jackets. He has to spend a lot of time working on the bus so we are trying not to cause him any trouble.

    Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges. When Andrew used the chain saw and cut his arm, we got to see how a tourniquet works.

    Steven and I threw up, but Scoutmaster Ted said it probably was just food poisoning from the left-over chicken. He said they got sick that way with food they ate in prison. I'm so glad he got out and became our scoutmaster. He said he figured out how to get things done better while he was doing his time. By the way mum, what is a pedal-file?

    I have to go now. We are going to town to mail our letters & buy some more beer and ammo. Don't worry about anything. We are fine and tonight it's my turn to sleep in the Scoutmaster's tent.

    Love, Jimmie xxxx