Let's all talk about our feelings

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Dashing_Chap, May 7, 2011.

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  1. Hello,

    My girlfriend says I hold in all my emotions and I never tell her how I feel, what does she mean by this? My ex said the same thing but I've no idea what the daft cows are rabbiting on about, personally I think they’re both hysterical.

    Does your Missus ask you about your feelings? What do you say? What should I say?


  2. Oh FFS!!! Who gives a shit!
  3. Funny, that's what I said too.
  4. This will end in tears.
  5. Do you want to talk about that?


  6. I feel your pain.

    Now fuck off, you knobthroat.
    • Like Like x 1
  7. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Can we have a forum about growing cabbages? It is not as easy as it seems. Brassicas are susceptible to a number of leaf diseases but I hear you can help prevent attack by following a three-year crop rotation, and by avoiding overfeeding. I'm not sure if that is true or if it is just some bollocks off of the internet.

    Can we have a forum about growing cabbages? Eh?
  8. What you need is a chick flick and some menthol nasal spray. Or some thinly veiled references to PTSD.

    But that approach is so boring. Rather than obsess about this, why not build on your obviously promising start as a sociopath and just murder her? There's a huge sale on in B&Q this weekend (again), are you sure your garden couldn't benefit from a pretty little patio?


    FYI - I never ask my husband about his emotions. I just play on them unmercifully.
    • Like Like x 1
  9. Isn't this for the shed thread? I hear alotments are quite theraputic too. Wouldn't catch me on one though, it would ruin my manicure and cause my skin to over exfoliate.

  10. ancienturion

    ancienturion LE Book Reviewer

    It also depends on what other crops/herbs you mingle with the brassica but I have also heard that baby shit is very good for runner beans. This is easily obtained when paunching/gralloching the recently born product of their loins prior to cooking of said item.
  11. They are also very rich in indole-3-carbinol, a chemical which boosts DNA repair in cells and appears to block the growth of cancer cells. Which may, or may not, be another example of bollocks off the internet.

    Can we then? Eh?

  12. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Hmmm. Easily obtained but hard to mulch down one would imagine? Unless one slung them under the rotivator? Putting babies in the compostor would only attract foxes so that is not an option.

    But the crop rotation thing interests me. So far as I understand it, it's brassica, legumes and grain? What the fuck does a gentleman grow in his garden that is grain? One is not a fucking farmer when all is said and done. Does grass count as grain?
  13. Yes, my dearest.

    But would it not be far more interesting to plant rice? You could make quite the little conversation piece by merely diverting a small river into your back garden. It has the added benefits of severely annoying one's neighbours in the event of a hosepipe ban, and bringing in reward money when the odd dead prostitute drifts in.

    Or you could go with maize? Teff is also good - it tastes like cocopops.

    LB x
  14. ancienturion

    ancienturion LE Book Reviewer

    Did you know that beans and grain together form a complete protein? Combined, they contain all the amino acids necessary for human health, just like meat or dairy products. The huge Fabaceae, formerly Leguminosae, family (legumes) contains over 16,000 varieties. Common edible legumes include peas, beans, peanuts, lentils, chickpeas, and soybeans.

    And babies' heads are delicious. The Army fed them to me so they must be good for us.
  15. I feel the need for a shit.