Lenin's Return to Russia

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by walrus, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Germany 1917, and the Germans were putting into effect their plan to knock Russia out of the Great War.

    Lenin and the Bolsheviks were being sealed in their train to be transported across Germany and home to Russia. As the War was still raging, they were forbidden from trying to speak to anyone outside of the train until they arrived

    Eventually the train set off, held up at almost every junction as war material and troop trains had priority.

    Naturally, after a day or two, the inhabitants of the train were getting a little impatient and wanting to know where they were.

    When the train next stopped, Lenin opened a small hatch, pushed his hand out, waited a few minutes, pulled it back and announced "We're still in West Prussia"

    The journey went on, many hours later, the same enquiry and the same procedure, the train stopped at signals, the hatch was opened and Lenin pushed his hand out, he pulled it back
    "We're in East Prussia, the bit that saw fighting"

    Hours passed and again the cry went up "Are we there yet?"

    Again when the train stopped, Lenin thrust his hand out and withdrew it quite quickly, rubbing it on his trousers "We're in Poland!, I don't know if it's the German or Russian bit"

    The train rumbled on and on and inevitably the question was asked again, once more, at signals Lenin thrusts his hand out, pulled back, looked at it and announced "Comrades - We are in Mother Russia!",

    There was much cheering as the word passed down the train, all except for Trotsky who sat thet looking puzzled, eventually he leaned over.

    "OK Vlad, you've got me beat, how did you know where we were by just putting your hand out?"

    "That's easy" replied Lenin, "The train is marked as a sealed train from Berlin to St Petersburg, to the Germans, that means it is important to the war.

    "When I put my hand out in West Prussia, the locals shook it."

    "When I put my hand out in East Prussia, the war weary people kissed it, when we were in Poland, I put my hand out and the locals spat on it"

    "And how did you know we were back in Russia?" asked Trotsky.

    "That's easy " said Lenin "I put my hand out......and some bastard stole my watch!"