Lembit Opik - otherwise known as "donkey dick"

Auld-Yin

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#2
He just flashes his latest expenses chit.
 
#4
I want to 'Do a Lembit' - maybe he'll start a lucrative 'pulling fitties' speaking tour? I'd rather listen to that than his politik.
 
#5
He's a tosser!
 
#6
MP date dorris who's very livelyhood revolves around 'exposure'.

I really cannot see what she finds so attractive about a relationship him. :roll:

Fair play though,he has consistantly punched well above his weight and as such is an inspiration to all men who look like a melted Rodney Trotter.
 
#7
From this:



to this:



and now this:



If he could sell his secret he'd be a billionaire!

Must be charming! :)
 
#8
Donkey-Spanker said:
I think his secret is to target birds in a certain IQ range. After all, a TV weathergirl, a pop singer and an underwear model wouldn't make a great quiz team, would they?


Yes, I am jealous :D
Hmm, except the Weather girl is a Metrologist, one of the few weather people that actually has a degree in it, you muppet? :roll:
 
#9
FFS sake guys have you not worked it out yet what all the ladies have known for years? - It's a Northern Irish thing!

Even if he has a face like a bag of smashed crabs, yer average bloke from God's Country can't fail to trap on the mainland. It's all about caring, sensitivity and superior sexual stamina. Must be something in the water.

It's a blessing....and a curse. :wink:

CW

Quis Separabit

Vestigia Nulla Retrorsum
 
#10
Squiggers said:
Donkey-Spanker said:
I think his secret is to target birds in a certain IQ range. After all, a TV weathergirl, a pop singer and an underwear model wouldn't make a great quiz team, would they?


Yes, I am jealous :D
Hmm, except the Weather girl is a Metrologist, one of the few weather people that actually has a degree in it, you muppet? :roll:
So she knows her way around town?. She turned from something 'not ugly' to 'a tired looking old slapper' in very short order.

Basically they're all using him for their own publicity.
 
#11
Squiggers said:
Donkey-Spanker said:
I think his secret is to target birds in a certain IQ range. After all, a TV weathergirl, a pop singer and an underwear model wouldn't make a great quiz team, would they?


Yes, I am jealous :D
Hmm, except the Weather girl is a Metrologist, one of the few weather people that actually has a degree in it, you muppet? :roll:
I think you mean meteorologist, which she does not have a degree in. Her degree from UCW Cardiff is in Welsh literature but she has done her cert. from the Met Office and gained, if her blog is to be believed a distinction.
 
#12
He must have a frak condition like his d1ck tasting of Vodka or something. My missus just described him as looking like "Jimmy Hills spastic lovechild", and apprently wouldnt shag him "ever" .. Lying cow. We all know they would sign up for a dry bumming from a frustrated Silverback if it had a Gold Card.
 
#13
Cuddles said:
Squiggers said:
Donkey-Spanker said:
I think his secret is to target birds in a certain IQ range. After all, a TV weathergirl, a pop singer and an underwear model wouldn't make a great quiz team, would they?


Yes, I am jealous :D
Hmm, except the Weather girl is a Metrologist, one of the few weather people that actually has a degree in it, you muppet? :roll:
I think you mean meteorologist, which she does not have a degree in. Her degree from UCW Cardiff is in Welsh literature but she has done her cert. from the Met Office and gained, if her blog is to be believed a distinction.

Brains are not high on my list of requirements so I would boff her without any qualifications :D
 
#14
Squiggers said:
Donkey-Spanker said:
I think his secret is to target birds in a certain IQ range. After all, a TV weathergirl, a pop singer and an underwear model wouldn't make a great quiz team, would they?


Yes, I am jealous :D
Hmm, except the Weather girl is a Metrologist, one of the few weather people that actually has a degree in it, you muppet? :roll:
Nope. She's a weather "girl" (now 51). IIRC she has a degree in English and Welsh before doing the quick Met Office course for tv presenters.

(Edit- beaten to it.)
 
#15
CaptainWillard said:
FFS sake guys have you not worked it out yet what all the ladies have known for years? - It's a Northern Irish thing!

Even if he has a face like a bag of smashed crabs, yer average bloke from God's Country can't fail to trap on the mainland. It's all about caring, sensitivity and superior sexual stamina. Must be something in the water.

It's a blessing....and a curse. :wink:

CW

Quis Separabit

Vestigia Nulla Retrorsum
His accent gets distinctly more Norn Iron when he's had a couple and is talking to a pretty girl. Oh yes it does Lembit.

He smiles a lot, has a very good line in self-deprecating humour , and makes them laugh inside 2 minutes.

So if there's a secret to his pulling power, there's something to be getting on with.



.. Nye.
 
#16
PartTimePongo said:
His accent gets distinctly more Norn Iron when he's had a couple and is talking to a pretty girl. Oh yes it does Lembit.

He smiles a lot, has a very good line in self-deprecating humour , and makes them laugh inside 2 minutes.

So if there's a secret to his pulling power, there's something to be getting on with.



.. Nye.
I'm wondering how you know this...
 
#20
Cuddles said:
Squiggers said:
Donkey-Spanker said:
I think his secret is to target birds in a certain IQ range. After all, a TV weathergirl, a pop singer and an underwear model wouldn't make a great quiz team, would they?


Yes, I am jealous :D
Hmm, except the Weather girl is a Metrologist, one of the few weather people that actually has a degree in it, you muppet? :roll:
I think you mean meteorologist, which she does not have a degree in. Her degree from UCW Cardiff is in Welsh literature but she has done her cert. from the Met Office and gained, if her blog is to be believed a distinction.
It appears that I can't spell this morning... And my mistake, cheers for clearing that up.
 
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