Legionary Titus Pullo of the XIIIth

#1
During "Rome" last night, Legionary Pullo cuts his way into a tent and kicks f*ck out of a couple of guards in front of 2 Egyptian wenches, thereby rescuing them from imminent death. As he finishes filleting an unfortunate Nubian with his pugio he looks up, covered in sweat, blood and stubble, clocks the 2 birds and says "Hello ladies". In a Geordie accent.

At this point Mrs P, with whom (grammar) I am sharing the sofa, squeals like a spit-roasted starlet and has to wring fluid out of her socks. There is not even the slightest pretence that the idea of a big sweaty bloke covered in another man's blood kicking her back doors in might be a bit much.

Fair enough, she readily admits to being as shallow as a foreign student's shell scrape where men are concerned. Personally, however, I suspect all women secretly harbour similar views. Am I wrong? And would it be wrong to disembowel some geezer in my kitchen in the hope of getting my brown wings?
 
#3
Paoli said:
During "Rome" last night, Legionary Pullo cuts his way into a tent and kicks f*ck out of a couple of guards in front of 2 Egyptian wenches, thereby rescuing them from imminent death. As he finishes filleting an unfortunate Nubian with his pugio he looks up, covered in sweat, blood and stubble, clocks the 2 birds and says "Hello ladies". In a Geordie accent.

At this point Mrs P, with whom (grammar) I am sharing the sofa, squeals like a spit-roasted starlet and has to wring fluid out of her socks. There is not even the slightest pretence that the idea of a big sweaty bloke covered in another man's blood kicking her back doors in might be a bit much.
I should confess that somewhere in SW London I was squealing for the same reason!!! :lol: We can't help it, it is in our biology!

"hello ladies" was a classic though!
 
#7
shrew said:
Hell yeah. Hence having a 'thing' about RMPs....


I can't help it! They're sooooooooooooooooo brutal.
As I said last time you are a pervert.

RMPs are not brutal. They are gay. All of them.
 
#8
Lairdx said:
shrew said:
Hell yeah. Hence having a 'thing' about RMPs....


I can't help it! They're sooooooooooooooooo brutal.
As I said last time you are a pervert.

RMPs are not brutal. They are gay. All of them.
... Oi. Do not ruin my fantasies. oooooooo to be dragged out a mess by my hair and then forced over a bonnet of a car.....
 
#10
You all say that now, but that bird was screaming rape when er...my mate tried it.
 
#11
shrew said:
Lairdx said:
shrew said:
Hell yeah. Hence having a 'thing' about RMPs....


I can't help it! They're sooooooooooooooooo brutal.
As I said last time you are a pervert.

RMPs are not brutal. They are gay. All of them.
... Oi. Do not ruin my fantasies. oooooooo to be dragged out a mess by my hair and then forced over a bonnet of a car.....
That really is a fantasy, if the average monkey tried to take you over the bonnet of a car, he'd put his back out.

If its brutal you want, I'm sure there are plenty of Arrsers with more distinguished pedigrees and a full complement of chromosomes, who would be more than happy to oblige.
 

Cutaway

LE
Kit Reviewer
#12
Paoli said:
Rowums said:
You havn't earned them already? Shame on you....
Yes, but you have to do a certain number of jumps a year to stay current :wink: .
Yeah, you've got to stay in date.
 
#13
It is a well known fact that a chap in a scrap leads the average lady to foam at the gusset like a well-shaken, slightly too warm to drink bottle of Veuve Cliquot. Even the ones who say they don't. Fisticuffs, they love it!
 
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