LEFT FOOT OR RIGHT FOOT FIRST?

#1
Hello chaps, I´m thinking of taking up running. I´ve been doing some research into this, and I´ve come up with a plan whereby I put on some running shoes (remembering to tie the laces properly before setting out), check it´s not raining and that I´m not in Haiti, say goodbye to mummy and set off down the road. The idea is that I put one foot in front of the other, then spring forward off the leading foot and repeat this process as quickly as possible until I am out of breath/feel ill/die (whichever occurs first). My question is, which foot should I start with, left or right?
 
#2
Jorrocks said:
Hello chaps, I´m thinking of taking up running. I´ve been doing some research into this, and I´ve come up with a plan whereby I put on some running shoes (remembering to tie the laces properly before setting out), check it´s not raining and that I´m not in Haiti, say goodbye to mummy and set off down the road. The idea is that I put one foot in front of the other, then spring forward off the leading foot and repeat this process as quickly as possible until I am out of breath/feel ill/die (whichever occurs first). My question is, which foot should I start with, left or right?
I larfed :p
You just know someone is going to hit it though
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#4
I tried this but I kept getting problems at the beginning. I mean, no one has ever explained to me what colour trainers are best for running. I though black and silver, but my mate said white and red.

Which are best?
 

RiflemanTom

Old-Salt
Book Reviewer
#5
Personally I'd alternate it each day so as not to wear one trainer out before the other as this can cause blisters and knee strain. Oh and red trainers ars scientifically proven to make you go faster up hill.
 
#6
I usually set off with my right foot, as that's where the accelerator is :)
 
#9
It never ceases to amaze me the amount of damn right stupid questions that appear on this website! :x

Everone knows that if you hang to the left, you start with your right foot, and visa versa. This is due to the oscillations set up by you bellend smacking against your thigh, causing a ripple effect to run down your leg and damage your trainers!

What is more important than colour is the waffle on your sole! You have to leave the correct imprints in mud when running, much like the old Clarks Commandos as worn at school! :)
 

The_Duke

LE
Moderator
#10
Chocolate milkshake is the answer. Get yourself to one of those specialist sports shops and pay well over the odds for some chocolate milkshake. If you don't like chocolate, I understand that they do it in other flavours too.

The consumption of this milkshake after ostentatious shaking in a brightly coloured, logo encrusted bottle will give you the speed of a Jamaican sprinter coupled with the endurance of a Kenyan long distance runner.

Honestly.
 

RiflemanTom

Old-Salt
Book Reviewer
#11
In theory yes and perfectly good advice for Infantry soldiers, but if you're in a support role, such as AGC or the Navy for instance, then your penis will of course be correspondingly small and will not generate enough oscilations to play an active role in your running style. In this instance I'd advise getting a bike.
 

Legs

ADC
Book Reviewer
#13
2/51 said:
It never ceases to amaze me the amount of damn right stupid questions that appear on this website! :x

Everone knows that if you hang to the left, you start with your right foot, and visa versa. This is due to the oscillations set up by you bellend smacking against your thigh, causing a ripple effect to run down your leg and damage your trainers!

What is more important than colour is the waffle on your sole! You have to leave the correct imprints in mud when running, much like the old Clarks Commandos as worn at school! :)
Do I have to bounce forward with both feet then?
 
#14
The_Duke said:
Chocolate milkshake is the answer. Get yourself to one of those specialist sports shops and pay well over the odds for some chocolate milkshake. If you don't like chocolate, I understand that they do it in other flavours too.

The consumption of this milkshake after ostentatious shaking in a brightly coloured, logo encrusted bottle will give you the speed of a Jamaican sprinter coupled with the endurance of a Kenyan long distance runner.

Honestly.
You´ve answered the wrong stupid question I think.
 

The_Duke

LE
Moderator
#15
Jorrocks said:
The_Duke said:
Chocolate milkshake is the answer. Get yourself to one of those specialist sports shops and pay well over the odds for some chocolate milkshake. If you don't like chocolate, I understand that they do it in other flavours too.

The consumption of this milkshake after ostentatious shaking in a brightly coloured, logo encrusted bottle will give you the speed of a Jamaican sprinter coupled with the endurance of a Kenyan long distance runner.

Honestly.
You´ve answered the wrong stupid question I think.
No you fool, the answer to any question about how to improve sporting performance is always "special milkshakes" :D
 
#18
The_Duke said:
Jorrocks said:
The_Duke said:
Chocolate milkshake is the answer. Get yourself to one of those specialist sports shops and pay well over the odds for some chocolate milkshake. If you don't like chocolate, I understand that they do it in other flavours too.

The consumption of this milkshake after ostentatious shaking in a brightly coloured, logo encrusted bottle will give you the speed of a Jamaican sprinter coupled with the endurance of a Kenyan long distance runner.

Honestly.
You´ve answered the wrong stupid question I think.
No you fool, the answer to any question about how to improve sporting performance is always "special milkshakes" :D
F*ck, how embarassing, I´ve been wah´d on my own wah!
 
A

armadillo

Guest
#19
You could improve your running, put on a I love gary glitter tshirt on and a pair of binos, hang around the school gates with all the school mums waiting. Lick your lips and rub your hands, they will soon get you running. Also a nice man with a big shiny car with a blue disco light will come and help you.

Got to go theres a large crowd in the street with burning torches, they come round and set up a BBQ for me how nice...
 
#20
WEll, that's me told. Tomorrow I will go and buy myself a) red (go fast) trainers, b) a huge stash of chocolate milkshake and then start running on alternate feet. I'm clearly well on the way to becoming an Olympic champion.

HOWEVER

the road outside my house goes both left and right. Can someone please tell me which way will get me fittest, fastest. I'm also not sure what colour T shirt would assist. All advice gratefully received.
 

Similar threads

New Posts

Latest Threads