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Leaving the funny farm

T

TheSnake

Guest
#1
Guten Tag,

Brand new to this site, and want some advice (apologies if this has been written elsewhere) :

I'm curious as to why women you first meet act strangely when you tell them that you were in the forces. Things start off well, but then deteriorate once the ice is broken.

Is it our humour?
 
#2
As a woman, but a military one, who has dated civilian men, I think it is because they (civilians) instantly size you up for husband/wife potential within seconds. They run through an image of your life together in a nano second and instantly believe that you will either run off with someone else, get posted away for ages, get permanently drunk with the lads and after enough wife beater act on it or drag them around the world while you piss into bottles at mess do s. They wouldnt be far wrong but hey, lifes an adventure and its their loss. You may want to start being creative about your occupation until the post coitel cigarette, by then you will have impressed them so much, they ll realise they cant do with out you. I think military chaps have a fab sense of humour. :D

Any military ladies out there agree? We are all the same from the neck up but some of us are uglier than others.
 
#3
Its our attitude generally and of course our humour!

We tend to be more lively than most and live life for today.
Most in civvie street seem to be less so - even those who profess to be live wires get them down the pub and offer up 15 pints and they soon make their excuses.

As for our humour its black, its dark and its funny but only to us and those who understand us!

Treat a lady like a lady and you will go far, treat them like a pocession and they will go far

Cheers
 
T

TheSnake

Guest
#4
So, be a walt right?
I'd rather they take it or leave it.
Or is that just the squaddie in me talking.....
I'll give the 'hyping myself up' angle a go. Up for anything really !!
:party:
 
#5
It generally deteriorates rapidly, first time you lovingly draw a dung laden digit over her top lip, p1ss in her pocket, and feel her mate up....

women.... cant live with em, cant stick a large screwdriver in their liver and hide the body in a culvert.
 
#6
shortfuse said:
women.... cant live with em, cant stick a large screwdriver in their liver and hide the body in a culvert.
Oh contraire Herr Fuse, just make sure you wrap it securely in chicken wire and weight it down with a kerbstone.
 
#7
lol guys..
i think foxy brown is right.. squaddies are great guys.. its just civvie women automatially think youre scum because of the whole stereo typing FB mentioned..
I have the best time goin out with the guys here.. last time i went out with civilians i ended up ditchin 'em for a group of strangers who i had just met.. well, it was more fun than standing at a bar listening to "how did she even consider wearing that!"
 
#8
illyrichards said:
lol guys..
i think foxy brown is right.. squaddies are great guys.. its just civvie women automatially think youre scum because of the whole stereo typing FB mentioned..
I have the best time goin out with the guys here.. last time i went out with civilians i ended up ditchin 'em for a group of strangers who i had just met.. well, it was more fun than standing at a bar listening to "how did she even consider wearing that!"
Why did you go out in dungarees and a squadron sweat shirt then?.. make a bit of effort FFS

I never met a civvy woman who automatically thought I was scum.....

It took 7 or 8 seconds to convince most of them i was.
 
#9
illyrichards said:
lol guys..
i think foxy brown is right.. squaddies are great guys.. its just civvie women automatially think youre scum because of the whole stereo typing FB mentioned..
I have the best time goin out with the guys here.. last time i went out with civilians i ended up ditchin 'em for a group of strangers who i had just met.. well, it was more fun than standing at a bar listening to "how did she even consider wearing that!"

What she means is she doesn't have any real friends, so the blokes allow her to accompany them to town on the proviso that they can give her arse to mouth on the way back to camp.
 
#10
or maybe its just because when sgt demands that the plt bonds we decide to go out to the local town.. and with it being a 28-6 ratio with one tee total female (making going out ratio 28-5 (if you cant figure that out)) you tend to end up being with guys.. yes, but like that matters because the other four females are great too and dont stand around bitching about other females in place
 
#11
illyrichards said:
or maybe its just because when sgt demands that the plt bonds we decide to go out to the local town.. and with it being a 28-6 ratio with one tee total female (making going out ratio 28-5 (if you cant figure that out)) you tend to end up being with guys.. yes, but like that matters because the other four females are great too and dont stand around bitching about other females in place

What a longwinded post, and all to simply confirm what I said about your lack of friends.....you forgot the bit about arse to mouth btw.
 
#12
yes because that post clearly states that i only go out with my plt.. when in fact it would be.. once a month? if that.. and arse to mouth? well, that would be you dear
 
#17
In my vast experience of making women think I am scum, being a squaddie rarely came into it.....

Its one of those gifts you either have, or haven't got (i.e. your gay)

Now as a slightly more mature chap, I still find making a lady think I am scum more satisfying than anything else I can think of....

Apart from opening them up, and wearing their intestines like a scarf while i play their distended uterus like a set of bagpipes.

Illy.....whats this I hear about you being a fucking billy no mates with a penchance for licking a schwanz covered in your own fresh dung?
 
#18
There certainly is a bit of abuse between Moody and Illy. Apart from giving me a good thrapping image, it's obviously jealousy;

Moody is Jealous of Illy because she's young, free, single, has a promising career ahead of her (did I say that with a straight face?).

Illy is Jealous of Moody because she's had more squaddies roar up her than Illy can ever hope to achieve :D
 
#19
I like men soldiers because I never need to check my breasts for lumps, always a willingly volunteer to suckle, and in the interests of medical care. Girls be honest we like a mans man. I personally have a penchant for being reminded that despite the fact I m a soldier( I look like a bag of shit in uniform), the sound of a rough hand being spanked across my curved arse reminds me that in fact I m a no good down dirty red blooded woman! Right now stuck in a place where I can only pleasure myself and the filthy talk on here is making me glisten. home in time for christmas and santa is going to get it! Dont squabble ladies it s uncivilised.

p.s Looking for a master when I get home, mil or civ, not fussed as long as you know what to do!

Did I say that out loud? I meant tell me my hair looks nice and buy me flowers, blah, blah, blah.....
 

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