Leaving Home at 8

Discussion in 'Current Affairs, News and Analysis' started by flibbertigibbet, Feb 12, 2010.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Far better for a child to be educated in a stable environment following the same syllabus rather than being dragged from pillar to post changing schools using different syllabi.
     
  2. I'm not sure there is a 'Right' or a 'Wrong' one here. I went off to school at 8 (years old not o'clock for you wags out there!) and spent the next nearly 11 years at the same school whilst my Mrs, also a Pad Brat, followed her folks around the world including spells in USA, London, Surrey, Cyprus and Wales. She got much better grades than I did, has a different type of group of friends but some happy memories of living in some interesting places - except Wales ofcourse: she had to learn Welsh there but they stopped it after a while as she was better at it than the natives.

    Over all, I regret being despatched at the age of 8 - far too young in my eyes. Now a parent of three, I would be reluctant to send any of them off until they were/are at least 13.

    In my day Boarding School allowance didn't apply to the first child so my folks, father an impoverished Captain at Staff Collage at the time, had to rely on the Direct Grant system from the County. When younger Brother and Sister followed on 2 and 4 years later, they got the allowance.

    Sadly I missed the programme - and am now going to try and find it on-line.

    My Prep school was barbaric by comparison with today and the Main School wasn't much better.
     
  3. Does anyone know if this is to be shown again?

    Me and 0A are considering sending the commz juniors to boarding school and this may be worth a watch!
     
  4. I went to 4 primary schools and 4 secondary schools, didn't do me any harm! Its personal choice, my parents didn't want someone else bringing us up, simple as that!
     
  5. BiscuitsAB

    BiscuitsAB LE Moderator

    bollox it din dun mee no arm dun it. Oi luved it. an i gotten a job in tecso n all.


    In truth I moved around a reasonable amount. I had seven schools in total in various parts of BFG and UK and don't really feel that i missed out on anything, other than grammar but I'm not sure that they were actually teaching grammar in the 70's just how to macramae a cnd badge.
     
  6. You can watch it online here:

    http://www.channel4.com/programmes/leaving-home-at-8/4od

    I went away at 8 and loved every minute of it. Would never have got half the grades or friends otherwise, and the same with my brothers. But we knew exactly why we went away - not because our parents didn't love us, but because it was the only option. It helped that they were overseas when we started, so we couldn't see them every weekend.

    I did laugh at the little boys running around playing 'terrorists.'
     
  7. Maybe this worth having an "experience" Poll, as its a common (and potentially stressful) dilemma for many parents in your position.

    I was an expat brat, packed off to a fairly austere prep school in the Derbyshire hills. The act of separation can be a distressing wrench for parents and kids (especially if you are the unlucky ones who are so far apart you don't even get to meet up in the shorter holidays - I only saw my parents twice each year) but, IMHO, once the kids get over the inevitable few days of miserable homesickness, they quickly "join the tribe" with the other kids and settle down. Boarding schools also tend to have high quality staff - such is the school's added burden of 24/7 care for its kids. My own school seemed harsh and strict at the time, but looking back with adult eyes I realise just how good was the quality of each individual staff member, and the overall nurturing of the kids.

    I believe the boarding school experience makes kids a heck of a lot more independent and resourceful at an early age, and sets them up well to adapt to a modern mobile life - e.g. going away to Uni, the Forces, a job in another town/country, etc. It also forces kids to interact with each other and, by removing the option of running off home, teaches them deal with social problems.
     
  8. I don't agree that you can't get the same confidence and independance living at home. I believe you also learn to be independant and resourseful moving every few years. You learn to make friends and fit into new environments extremely quickly and easily. It depends on each individual child.
     
  9. As someone who spent his first 6 years of education in 6 different schools spread from Europe to the Far East I wasn't prepared to let my children go through the same. At 10 I couldn't even read and was bullied intensely for being thick, my RM father's initial response was to take me to Karate and boxing lessons - the bullying stopped pretty smartish but my school record went down hill rapidly until I discovered education. I know I was incredibly lucky in the end, private tutors and hard work got me a scholarship in an independent school where I finally settled down leading to a half decent degree level education.

    Both my kids went to boarding school at 8, my son went first after asking us if he could go - his school in Gosport was a nothing more than a holding centre for the illiterate and his best friend was phoning him to say how good the sports facilities were at his boarding school and all the extra-curricula activities were fantastic, once he went his little sister always assumed she would go. They both loved it and are now very well qualified, independent and confident kids with strong friendships they expect to last all their lives. At 22 my son is about to be a father and has his own successful business, my 20 year old daughter goes to University in September after completing an HND in Sport, she currently works as an outdoor activity instructor in a year out of education. During their educational period I had moved home 5 times including areas where their schooling would have been an educational drought, I seriously doubt they would be where they are now.

    To top it all off I now have a great relationship with both my kids, far better than I ever had with my parents. Their schooling and all round upbringing have been a success as far as we are concerned and at the end of the day the only thing you can give your children is a firm foundation on which to build the rest of their life (and maybe a bit of cash to help them out). For some that may be dragging them around the world, for others it is continuity, each to his own, but statements like "wouldn't have someone else bringing up my kids" are nothing more than emotional crap which have little relevance to the overall success of parenthood.
     
  10. We took my granddaughters then aged 8 and 6 on a recce to the prep school my sons went to. The 8 year old said "this is for me" and boarded there whilst the 6 year olds exact words were "It's very nice but stuff this for a game of soldiers!" [Cant think where she got that expression from] and went through the garrison /state school system. Both turned out stable fine adults. My sons always had the hang-dog expression on their faces when going back after exeat or holidays but once there we had to find them to say goodbye as they were engaged in joyful animation with their classmates. As a generalisation, anyone who thinks the state school system compares favourably with public schools are delusional.
     
  11. BK!

    BK! Old-Salt

    Sent off at 8 and apart from my first term when I was bullied, I loved every minute of it. I had 14 homes in my first 18 years and I'm sure I wouldn't have had a decent education without boarding school.

    Could I do it to my kids - no! There again, I'm no longer in the army. If I was the answer might be different.
     
  12. You didn't have to cope with my youngest when she was three!

    Finding out now that there was an option - now that's sad.