Least heard sentences..

Had this asked me the other day - What are the least heard sentences that you've come across, or have made?

For example:

1) Peter Mandelson is an awfully nice chap, and really doesn't deserve to be called the Prince of Darkness.

2) "Yes, love, that outfit does make you look fat."

3) Squiggers is able to come up with a thread that won't involve him being called as a twunt for nearly all of it. :D

Any ones anyone can come up with?

Incoming.. 3.. 2.. 1...
I have to say I feel totally safe with those chaps in Govt, Safe hands on the helm everyone of them.


I'm sure the aviation types will be able to debunk this almost certainly apocryphal story, but:

Last words on the cockpit voice recorder of a 'plane flying through some mountain range at an altitude of 12,000 ft.

"Hey! It says here this mountain is 13 ..."
Captain on the bridge of the Titanic, "Where the fcuk is all this water coming from"

Mayor of Hiroshima as a lone American bomber flies high overhead, "Is it me or was that a bright flash"
I can categorically guarantee here and now that Boarding School Allowance will never be cut......CDS.


It made men of William and Harry, doing selfless service for their country, so all my children are going to do the same and join the armed forces........a Politician.


Book Reviewer
I thought the book repositories were closed today, but that window is o . . . . .
The old favourites...

Of course I wont cum in your mouth.

You are on the pill aren't you?

Of course I love you, now get on top.
"OK, I promise to pay back all the dodgy expenses claimed during my time in parliment."

Never going to happen.
Arrse sprog "I know, I'll use the search function before asking a question that has been done to death a million times already"
Put your money back in your pocket, this is definately my round............
PM at question time

I am a chip

I am blind

I do swamp my self

Peter does swallow and push back

I did stich the MOD up like kippers

The UK is skint and its my fault
"Don't worry, of course I'll make sure the Part Twos are completed for the SSgts before the cut off date".

Definately not heard at 170!

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