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Latest Army weapon in Iraq

#1
From the Telegraph:

• The Ministry of Defence has unveiled its latest weapon - Lucozade. The ministry has signed a £1.5 million contract for isotonic drinks to try to keep soldiers hydrated in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Powdered Lucozade Sport in 24-hour ration packs, with the slogan "Combat your thirst", replaces the traditional dried lemon drink known unaffectionately as "screech".
 
#2
Lucozade....... Goffing drink, got to be the greatest ever total waste of a good empty bottle!!! reckon this entrant to the ratpack may end up knocking off 'cheese processed' from the top of the chuck it away list.....
 
#3
Well I suppose its about time the MoD provided some sort of isotonic drink considering the amount of water folk have to drink out there and the importance that is placed on correct rehydration.

It always amazed me that on visiting US bases out their in the cookhouse there was a large bowl of Gatoraid sachets sat by the servery yet go to back to a British unit and its watered down to f*ck screech in the cookhouse or a visit to the 'lets make as much money out of our troops as possible' EFI for a bottle of well over-priced Robinsons.
 
#4
What's wrong with cheese possessed then Snapper - Bloody brilliant, especially when its a bit old and salt crystals have formed !!
 

cpunk

LE
Moderator
#5
TheHelpfulStacker said:
It always amazed me that on visiting US bases out their in the cookhouse there was a large bowl of Gatoraid sachets sat by the servery...
It amazes you that the Brits hitherto couldn't be arsed to provide isotonic drinks? Doesn't amaze me at all.

Providing lucozade is a nice idea but it'll go the same way as screech: into the bin at endex. The only time I've ever used a packet of screech was in 1989, in an OP on a farm near Kilkeel, when I accidentally poured a sachet into my nice flask of hot tea under the mistaken impression it was sugar. Yuck.
 
#6
LARD said:
What's wrong with cheese possessed then Snapper - Bloody brilliant, especially when its a bit old and salt crystals have formed !!

And whatever happened to that green margarine you got in the old 4 man compo? And compo sausages in a tin??? what company made those? I want to visit one day

And im sure there are still some in here who still remember the ultimate, angel dust in a tube, never been beaten, condensed milk, one squirt in gob, wonderful on biscuits AB ('ard bastards) or a combination said milk and the jam you got too...*memories flooding in*
 
#7
emptyeye said:
LARD said:
What's wrong with cheese possessed then Snapper - Bloody brilliant, especially when its a bit old and salt crystals have formed !!

And whatever happened to that green margarine you got in the old 4 man compo? And compo sausages in a tin??? what company made those? I want to visit one day

And im sure there are still some in here who still remember the ultimate, angel dust in a tube, never been beaten, condensed milk, one squirt in gob, wonderful on biscuits AB ('ard bastards) or a combination said milk and the jam you got too...*memories flooding in*
Damn right Empteye. Those were the days - cheery but violent
 
#9
TheHelpfulStacker said:
Bacon Grill, hmmmmmm.

Sliced thin and fried in a pan.

I'm hungry now.....
You can get bacon grill in Tescos, got some last night, Mrs emptyeye just shakes head when she watches me drooling over the tin, try it on a butty, branston pickle (small chunk)

OMFG its just sex on a sandwich
 
#10
So funny yesterday morning when loggy Brigadier on Radio 5 to talk about Isotonic drink and Campbell tried to get his take on Basra situation. Loggy stuck to guns and delivered hydration, health etc spiel in response to 'what do you think about situation in Basra etc?'
 
#11
Something in me just knows that the one place on planet earth any sane individual would not want to go would be the compo sausage factory. Is the mod just for Iraq, or will it be introduced everywhere? They might be handy to keep as a stash for hangovers.

I do admit having a strange bacon grill fetish that extends all the way back to my cadet days. Luncheon meat too, although after about an 8 year break, I tried some original SPAM (national dish of Hawai'i BTW). Tasted like a cat's arrse. Won't be doing that again in a hurry.

CPUNK: I'm having a hell of a time focusing on anything you write with that GIF of Charlotte Church bouncing about. I'm not suggesting for a second you get rid of it, but please keep in it mind if you ever need us to concentrate carefully. :D
 
#12
crabtastic said:
Something in me just knows that the one place on planet earth any sane individual would not want to go would be the compo sausage factory. I'd keep the lucozade around to counter the effects of the overuse of the 'ahem' mouthwash.

I do admit having a strange bacon grill fetish that extends all the way back to my cadet days. Luncheon meat too, although after about an 8 year break, I tried some original SPAM (national dish of Hawai'i BTW). Tasted like a cat's arrse. Won't be doing that again in a hurry.

CPUNK: I'm having a hell of a time focusing on anything you write with that GIF of Charlotte Church bouncing about. I'm not suggesting for a second you get rid of it, but please keep in it mind if you ever need us to concentrate carefully. :D
Oh thats just cruel, I mean, those square compo sausages were just the biz, does anybody know who actually made them and are they still about? and as far as spam is concerned, now yer talking, cheese spread (dairylea) couple of slabs of spam (full fat version not the unleaded s**t) and sliced to minimum 3mm in thickness, bloomer loaf cut to regulation door stop size, no butter, use cheese spread as a base, the only sandwich you would ever want on this earth ever!!

*jumps up and down shouting 'SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM' in a monty python stylee, and wonders how hes knows what a cats arrse tastes like*
 
#13
emptyeye said:
crabtastic said:
Something in me just knows that the one place on planet earth any sane individual would not want to go would be the compo sausage factory. I'd keep the lucozade around to counter the effects of the overuse of the 'ahem' mouthwash.

I do admit having a strange bacon grill fetish that extends all the way back to my cadet days. Luncheon meat too, although after about an 8 year break, I tried some original SPAM (national dish of Hawai'i BTW). Tasted like a cat's arrse. Won't be doing that again in a hurry.

CPUNK: I'm having a hell of a time focusing on anything you write with that GIF of Charlotte Church bouncing about. I'm not suggesting for a second you get rid of it, but please keep in it mind if you ever need us to concentrate carefully. :D
Oh thats just cruel, I mean, those square compo sausages were just the biz, does anybody know who actually made them and are they still about? and as far as spam is concerned, now yer talking, cheese spread (dairylea) couple of slabs of spam (full fat version not the unleaded s**t) and sliced to minimum 3mm in thickness, bloomer loaf cut to regulation door stop size, no butter, use cheese spread as a base, the only sandwich you would ever want on this earth ever!!

*jumps up and down shouting 'SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM' in a monthy python stylee, and wonders how hes knows what a cats arrse tastes like*
Ask your mum's cat. :wink:
 
#15
Could a moderator combine the two threads that are now running on this subject. Other thread is titled "Ultimate Weapon".

Now onto my point...

Top ten tips for hydration. This bird might have a PhD in Human Sciences but I think she failed CSE maths. My 3-year old can count better than her. Follow the link to see why.

http://defenceintranet.diiweb.r.mil...0B917F98BE/0/Qin10TopTipshydration14Sep05.pdf

If this is an indicator of QinetiQ's mathematical abilities, it will go some way to explaining why a project that is budgeted at £x million always ends up costing £2x million.
 
#16
Damn and blast it! Do you mean that my troop sergeant was lying when he told me to drink plenty of screech in hoit weather because it was isotonic. They shall smart for this.

TM
 
#17
Good link Fuchs66. Love the statements on their http://www.militaryrations.co.uk/ page:

Have a long shelf life (3 years) and require no refrigeration.
State-of-the-art aluminium foil pouch technology ensures full sterilisation.
Meals designed by chefs and food technologists.
Top quality ingredients used.
Do not contain chemicals or artificial additives.
Made with non-genetically modified ingredients.


Wait till Mrs Abs finds out combining bacon and beans is the work of chefs and food technologists.

Anyone remember the wee tins of curry?
 
#19
It was considered very sophisticated in my day to slice the Compo sausages sideways before frying. This produced artistic flower-like slices. We all complimented the loader on his artistic bent.....while standing waist deep in Saltau mud.
 
#20
Ultimate throw away for me was 1970's vintage "Mock Turtle Soup" I mean, WTF? I never mocked a turtle in my life and had no intention of starting.

Ultimate feast was puncture lids and wedge tin of compo sausage and tin of "chinese wedding cake" between gaps on exhaust manifold of Bedford RL. Arrive at new Loc and hey presto! ready to eat with some RAOC bread marked "Friday" though which Friday no-one could be sure. Adding a squirt of margarine from a green toothpaste type tube was pure heaven.

Only downside was trundling along for hours at convoy speed with the sweet smell of cooking compo wafting up from the engine cover.

I seem to remember some "drink" which came in the form of a block with the look and consistency of a mossaic tile. Pounding it into millions of bits, adding water and waiting several hours resulted in a drink that was GOPPING. By the way, Tiffin bars, WTF was that about?
 

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