Large trouser pockets....

After being at the Corps museum a Colonel there stated military museums only survived because of theft on the field hence why engineers have larger left pockets. This was mentioned today and someone divulged into how three of them stole a well known riverside pub sign in the Medway area that is 30 foot up and hanging on hooks, stands nearly a metre tall and weighs a good 15kg!!

It leads me to ask you, whats the best thing you've ever acquired, drunk or sober?? names not welcome however some well explained elaberate stories will be great!!
We stole an 'RMP Crime Awareness' banner. :wink:

As well as 'borrowing' a large feck off banner from above the gate house of Colditz Castle.
Hyuge moosehead, from a pub; spread of antlers ( or whatever ) a good six feet.

Def Plt, 4 RGJ...
I've stolen a few virginity's in my time.

Not ready to fess up to the big stuff yet. Toooo, depressing.
A large stuffed Alligator from a pub on the Mohnesee.

We had to take that back though. We did take it back in style. We marched back in the next day, Alligator under arms whilst one of the chaps piped us in to the 'Dambusters' theme on bagpipes. :D
MacDonnalds, table chairs, the lot from one family eating area. Somewhere in Hanover, circa 81.

Still ,not as good as the Gunners not far from Cella, that used to nick cars and load into a four tonner and takeaway :)
Giant feck off lightning conductor from the top of a church in Newcastle (in the shape of a four armed pointy cross). I was pissed, and had to rock it back and forwards till it broke - nearly pulled me off the fricken tower when the weight came into my hands...

Then got chased for about 6 blocks by a yelling plod before I fell through a skylight. Lost the thing on the way down. Always regretted not having it as a souveneir at home.


we stole a big fook off muncipal pot (mong spelling i,m sure) from gt yarmouth looked quite nice outside the gaurdroom :p .
thought we couldnt be beaten until someone pulled out the road sign for gt yarmouth 8O
oh happy days
I've still got the 1 Armd Div flag from outside Div HQ stashed somewhere from back in the 80's (Verden) - can't even remember how I got it!
my god father (a dentist) when training to be a dentist with someone who eventually retired a colonel (an army dentist) and another mate were all keen climbers. They stole a claw off the liver birds toe and got it the several miles back to their student accomodation.

i managed to steal someone else girlfriend once. alas she was stolen off me though so karma kicked me in the arrse for that one.
Argentine mercedes G-Wagen stolen by 18 sqn chinooks in the falklands, chinook hovered over said g-wagon ground crew stapped it up and it was gone, and was last seen being pushed into an ISO container before being shipped back to Gutersloh.

When a new gearbox part was needed it transpired that the Jeep was unpaid for and Mercedes requested the vehicle back. As spoils of war it was not available for return. Mercedes refused to supply parts and spares had to be obtained elsewhere.

When 18 Squadron returned to England, the jeep proved impossible to register with the DVLA as it had no importation documents. It had always been the intention to donate the Jeep to the RAF Museum and so it was moved to Cosford, again by Chinook, on 14 June 2001.


As a yoof having completed Trade Training in Bordon a few mates and I were believed to have gone to a certain public house in Alton drank copious amounts of beer (probably six or seven pints as we hadn't 'done' anytime in the Field Army honing our on board offal to cope with anymore)and removed two steel axes from the pub sign. Oops! We wuz pished as the proverbial and smuggled them back into barracks....needless to say 'we wuz sussed' and were promptly marched infront of the Old Man......postings to units were delayed, had to effect repairs to said sign; the Landlord thought it quite funny - Although the ban from the pub ends when I shuffle off this mortal coil.

BTW the old man fined us an'undred and gave us 7 days Rippers - an'undred was a shed load of dosh in those days.

Found out later it was the Taxi driver 'wot grassed us up!' as he thought it strange that a group of soldiers and two axes got in his cab pished up - an everyday occurence I'm sure.

But how we laughed....
Q.C.S RAF REGIMENT stole the gateguard spitefire at RAF Uxbridge and pushed it into Uxbridge town and parked it outside Uxbridge tube station entrance. The spitefire was returned to RAF Uxbridge and the spitefire wheels were removed to prevent it from being stolen again.


two big car banners from car dealers in sonthoffen whilst on snow-queen.
A Chieftan and a 432 from the barracks next door (RH I seem to remember) and the next day a Ferret "borrowed" from the tank park along with a massive land grading machine. Oh how the RSM laughed. :eek:

Now that was a good weekend. :D

We didn't get to keep them though. :roll:
Old fashioned red 'phone box. Sadly we didn't get to keep it as when we crossed into Cornwall, various officers of the law and vicious dogs were waiting for us. However once they realised a)we were a rugby team, b)all so wankered it would have made their custody suite untenable and c)had several lawyers in the party they negotiated a very gentlemanly agreement.

We gave up one of our number, a Catholic priest btw and the phone box. They in turn let us go on our way. The silver lining was I got to step up, aged 18, into the first team the next day. The downside it was against Redruth, at Hellfire Corner...oggy fecking eye!
A large and very very old lantern that was hanging above the entrance to Jerusalem's old city...sneaked it passed an IDF patrol and had to return it the next day when the locals got a bit upset. Good job we didn't follow through with our plan to paint the Wailing wall - we had the green paint and were so sure it was going to look great!
A huge brass round crest off the First National Bank of Kuwait on Failaka Island.

Flew there on a "recce" about a week after the ground war had ended during GW1. Island was supposed to be deserted leaving us to loot, oops, I meant recce for survivors.

Imagine our surprise when walking down the road back to the Lynx with our loot, oops, I meant retrieved artifacts, we ran into two Kuwaiti soldiers who had been put there to guard the place. Unfortunatley no one had bothered to tell us what Kuwaiti uniforms looked like and there was a tense few seconds when we nearly ended up bumping off two friendlies.

B*stard OC of 654 wouldn't let me bring it back to Blighty though so it's probably still lying out in the desert somewhere.

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