Lard Arrses to get paid??????

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by two-four-albert, Jan 24, 2008.

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  1. I caught the bit on the news today that fatttys in the uk are to be paid to loose weight?????? A few questions;

    Does the Army qualify?? (QMs Dept could be quids in)

    Do you get more if your a fat Lezzer??

    Is this another bonus to look forward to on leaving, state sponsered nights out??

    Let the debate begin :)
  2. It's another example of Politicians' Logic: "Something must be done, this is something, therefore it must be done". :roll:

    Then again, anything which (purportedly) reduces the number of fat-arrsed birds in this country can't be all bad.
  3. Sympathetic_Reaction

    Sympathetic_Reaction LE Book Reviewer

    Anyone see the Simpsons episode where homer realises he can work from home if he gains some weight....amazing how life parodies art...or is is the other way round?

    Anyway how 'fat' do i have to BMI is on the edge of overweight...a bit more time down the gym and I might nudge over to a bit of extra cash..;)

  4. RLC are quids in. :slow:
  5. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Wait a minute, there's something wrong here, very wrong.

    Smoking is bad, we should smoke less as it's unhealthy and costs the NHS - sooo, tax it, create laws to make it more difficult.

    Drinking is bad, we should drink less as it's unhealthy and costs the NHS and society - soooo, tax it, license premises to supply it.

    Being a fat, lardy, big-arrsed waster is bad, we should be less fat becuase being fat is unhealthy and costs the NHS - soooo , PAY PEOPLE TO STOP BEING FAT?????

    Right, I know my facking rights - I want to be paid not to drink, and I want to be paid to smoke less.

    WANKERS!!! :evil: :evil: :evil:
  6. After just joining a gym, it would appear that having made the decision that I would like to trim a few extra pounds (of which there are currently many) of my worryingly wobbly frame. So now I am paying to loose weight. Does this mean there will be some sort of Government Subsidy to offset my outlay on me taking the decision that I need to get myself down to the gym, and take some interest in myself after a six month sabbatical of healthy living? Or do I need to register as someone suffering from clinical depression with an addiction to pies, leading to using lard as a nicorette type equivalent pie substitute. All this after hearing the announcement this morning on the news on the way to work, that Council Tax is looking to raise at twice the level of inflation, and leisure centres and public swimming pools are still going to have to close because they don't receive enough support from local government. FFS what else do they spend the Council Tax on, as round my way, the roads are still shit, and the binmen turnh up once every February you might imagine, we are asll quite excitied in our street as it is almost upon us again! People shopuld take a personal responsibility for themselves, or face the fcuking consequences of a painful existence suffering from heart attacks, with eventual keeling over.

    Sorry I got so carrtied away with my rant there I am not sure if it stayed relevant, buit feel better for it!!

    "O_J jumps from soap box, taking care to land feet together and flex the knees on impact"
  7. Are you starting the Artificer v Artisan debate again mate?
  8. Along similar lines to O_J, if the government is to pay people to lose weight, does that not discriminate against those of us, in fact the majority of us that use this forum, who have to maintain a certain standard of fitness as part of our employment.

    Some may argue that we are paid reasonably well. However, there are also those whose only exercise seems to be producing another little chav and do much better on benefits than we do through honest graft. Another handout will merely encourage them to eat twice as many pies as usual so as to be able to claim lardarrse benefit on top of all the others that they sponge from the state.

    Perhaps they should be encouraged to take exercise to lose weight, such as sorting out the roads or emptying the bins (particularly round O_J's way) before they receive any state benefits.

  9. Biped, well said sir. :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
  10. I hope it's better monitored than the previous 'pay kids to stay in school' and 'pay junkies to stay clean' schemes. You see, I'm a hopeless optimist.

    But, no dout, a parcel of the mandatory VECs (Very Expensive Consultants) will be wheeled out to prove that the scheme's a success by all relevant indicators (the actual weight/fitness/health of the subject being disregarded in the survey as unimportant). We can then roll out similar schemes for burglars, child molestors and serial killers thus freeing up government funds for when we close and sell-off all the prisons.
  11. About time I say!

    "Stick me another four pies in the oven love, I'll eat them when I get back from the chippy!"

    We've been throwing money at junkies and criminals for years, fat people are a move in the right direction!
  12. Cernunnos, I take it by the posting today that you are weathering the storm on the home front. Can we expect another intstalment of the Frau S sga soon, and has her hair grown back? I wait with baited breath......
  13. My bold - yes you normally get promoted and commisioned later on in life espically if you is black also.................
  14. Biped

    Biped LE Book Reviewer

    Question posted by Michael Jabez Foster MP:

  15. All in good time!