Knitghtrider V A-team

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Mighty_doh_nut, Mar 8, 2006.

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  1. I was watching the Gold channels in a fit of boredowm last night..

    My mind started wandering and I tried to picture a scenario where some bad guys, disguised as good guys hired Hannible, Face, BA and Murdoch only to find themselves pitched agaisnt, Michael Knight and his throbbing 6ltr V8 talking Pontiac-Penosaurus-car.

    Who would win? How much ammo would they go through?

    Hannibel in my mind was a bit wet, past his prime and he wore driving gloves (hardly a hero) Faceman although deserving credit for being nails in Battlestargalactica was also on the homo-ish side. BA was just a fat scary looking doorman that couldn't run without severe leg chaffing.

    Murdoch however was a different kettle of cuttle fish... mad as a wasp, could fly more stuff than Lt Finn in Wild geese.. Totally unflappable and easily led up the garden path.


    A fcuking nails motor and a hairy chested swimming instructor heavily into Germans and cheap leather jackets. Very tall so if using Kitt as a means of delivering villains, could only drop one off at a time at the polizie emrium as he'd have to have the seat all the way back to cater for his long legs.

    Britain wanted to make a remake in 1983 but the only people available were that spam cnut from Dempsey and Makepeace and our talking car was a 1.1 ltr Maetsro club

    Arrsers, this is the most serious debate yet.. your thoughts please, help me put this matter to rest.
  2. Doesn't matter how much ammo the A-Team would get through. Micheal Knight and Kitt would still come through unscathed, not only 'cos Kitt was bullet proof, but the marksmanship of the A-Team was pants.

    I think a stalemate would be on the cards.
  3. My money's on KITT and his side-kick beating the A-Team hands down. It's very simple:

    A-Team - thousands of rounds (from 1 magazine!) - no one killed or even seriously injured.

    Knight Rider - One Mega Pulse from KITTs microwave jammer and any vehicle (land or air) comes to a halt. Cars/choppers that crash blow up and no-one ever climbs out of the wreckage.


    A-Team - A fcuking van.

    Knight Rider - A cool Black T-Top which can go at 230mph (it did last night anyway!) and jump over trucks with the push of a button (no ramps needed).


    A-Team - BA and his welding torch.

    Knight Rider - Bonnie.

    Nuff said!!
  4. Well MDN I thought you were on a promise last night or did the Rohypnol not kick in?

    Anyway back on thread.

    A-Team were apparently a "Crack Commando Unit" who broke out of a maximum security stockade in 1972 to join the Los Angelis underground. However as has been pointed out they couldn't shoot for sh!t where as Mick Knight was a double hard porn star looking barsteward. The A-Team and Knight Rider seemed to get into the same sort of situations and Mick knight sorted the sh!t out with just himself and the car. The A-Team required 4 men a large van and some metal working skills.

    So in summary Mick Knight and Kit would kick seven shades of sh!t out of the A-Team.
  5. Michael Knight and KITT would win hands down (lor possibly throttles down) due to the simple fact that the A Team appeared to be utterly incapable of killing or even hurting anyone.

    That said, Mikey and his wheels would have to be very careful not to end up fighting near an abandoned shed full of power tools, as the A Team would simply go inside, turn on the 'wocka-chocka' music, and build a .50 cal out of drill bits and rubber bands.
  6. Sorry gents it isn't that cut and dried. There are various subtle points that are being missed.
    What if BA were to cobble together a huge battering ram out of a biscuit tin and weld it to a combine harvester whilst they were holed up in a barn? That could give Kitt a run for his money.
    And if Michael ever got out of his wheels, he would be done for. OK so he could probably jaw Hannibal one on one, and absorb a few blows in his conky afro, but that's about it.

    However, what if the Hoff's undeniable subliminal homo-erotic appeal gets the better of the blatantly bi-curious face and he switches sides?
    It's a tough one to call, fellas with way too many variables. We need to put them in a specific scenario to narrow things down and get an answer.
    But as BA once said.
    "That Michael Night? I pity the fool that thinks he can grow a bigger af-muthafcukin-ro than me. I'll brake my foot off in his honky ass and show that punk car of his what time it muthafcuking is, ya dig?"
  7. I'm for the A Team on this one, yes Kitt and that Hasselltoss idiot would of captured them but the Knight Foundation's makeshift prison/workshop with welding equipment and various tools which would transform mundane bits of tubing and random bits of armour plating plus a very large truck that would enable BA and company to construct a Mong Panzer 4000 and destroy Kitt as well as forcing Devon, Hasselltoss and Bonnie to go flying through the air in a very eighties stuntman way.

    Yes Knightrider did have Bonnie but the A-Team had Amy. Thoughts of Amy made my then even smaller winky get hard and me as a youngster ever so confused!!!!!
  8. So are you saying that the A Team would be able to capture the Knight Foundation's big white callsign intact? How would they do that if they were incarcerated themselves?

    Or does your scenario involve some sort of duplicitous behaviour from Devon, possibly narked that Michael had been slipping Bonnie the occasional crippler in the back of the truck?
  9. No-ones' remembered that his royal campness, Boy George, was also a member of A Team!

    3-4 episodes yes?

    (Enough reason to vote Knight Industries me thinks...)
  10. Yes, The A-Team were completely shite at actually killing anyone, but they made some pretty cracking elastic-band-propelled-vegetable-launchers: enough rotten-potato mush on the floor would cause even KITT some traction issues...
  11. DD I've made the assumption on the plotline being that, Knight Industries current infrastructure was not capable of securing the A-Team and thus have to be incarcerated in a Workshop come prison. After of course one of Hannibals various disguises has failed the A-Team
  12. Hasselhoff wins hands down and heres why:-

    1. David Hasselhoff once walked down the street with a massive erection.
    There were no survivors.

    2. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures David Hasselhoff allows to live. There is no "I" in team. There is an "I" in David Hasselhoff. **** you, team.

    3. When David Hasselhoff drinks pee, his asparagus smells funny.

    4. When David Hasselhoff was born, the nurse said, "Holy *rap! That's David Hasselhoff!" Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with.

    5. When David Hasselhoff goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

    6. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects David Hasselhoff Could use to kill you, including the room itself.

    7. The popular videogame "Doom" is based loosely around the time Satan borrowed two bucks from David Hasselhoff and forgot to pay him back.

    8. David Hasselhoff can count backwards from infinity.

    9. Crop circles are David's way of telling the world that sometimes Corn needs to lie the fu*k down.

    10. When David Hasselhoff jumps into a body of water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets David instead. David Hasselhoff is the only man to Ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

    11. David Hasselhoff can divide by zero.

    12. In fine print at on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by David Hasselhoff, and Those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever come to Matching him.

    13. David Hasselhoff is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's * hit.

    14. David Hasselhoff has two speeds: walk and kill.

    15. David Hasselhoff is the reason why Wally is hiding.

    16. David Hasselhoff can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

    17. You are what you eat. That is why David Hasselhoff diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children.

    18. David Hasselhoff once beat Super Mario Bros 3 without even touching hisNintendo controller. He just yelled at his TV in between bites of his "Fillet of Child" sandwich, and the game beat itself out of fear.

    19. David Hasselhoff played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun And won.

    20. If you were to lock David Hasselhoff in a room with a guitar, a Year later you would have the greatest album ever, it would sweep the Grammy's. When asked why he doesn't do this David replied "Because Grammy's are For queers." Then he ate a knife to show the seriousness of his response.

    21. On his birthday, David Hasselhoff randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

    22. David Hasselhoff doesn't believe in rubber condoms. Instead, he Sticks his *enis in a girl, and uses that girl as a condom while fu**ing another.

    23. When David Hasselhoff does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

    24. Whenever David Hasselhoff puts out a cigarette, he throws it in Slow motion into a long line of gasoline and calmly walks away as an Inferno erupts behind him.

    25. David Hasselhoff invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

    26. David Hasselhoff coined the phrase, "I could eat a Horse" after he ate every last unicorn in existence.

    27. David Hasselhoff haunts Freddy Krueger's nightmares.

    28. The eternal conundrum "what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object" was finally solved when David Hasselhoff punched Himself in the face.

    I rest my case!
  13. Just to throw a spanner in the works - Airwolf anyone?

    Kind of a 3 way, or maybe a two on one?

    C'mon, it had naff helmets and suits, but a cool theme tune and the 'chopper had rockets ffs!

    Altogether now, der der der de der... :D
  14. The A team didn't actually have to kill anyone, they scared the living fcuk out of everyone without actual termination. If they were arrested the most they could be charged with was irrational discharge of an automatic weapon.

    Michael Knight coul dbe charged with abondoning a vehicle and being 'bi-curious' in charge of a fast motor.

    How does Knight shape up when kitt isn't around, ie if BA snuck into the hidey hole and welded up the doors.

    Also I'm not convinvced knight can't tap inbto extra terestrial resources.


    Now then, Face man over came the cylons in Battlestar galactica, without too much of a problem, leaving Lorne green safe to return to Bonanza and die peacefully of a cerebral hemorrhage. But at that stage they didn't have the Hoffnmeister and the Powered up pontiac as assistants.

    Food for thought.

    On a slight sideline... Bennet we've already established that your a cnut, get back in the cadet forum and stay there alternativley die in a housefire you gutless walt turd