Just heard it too. My sentiments exactly, the_guru. I don't see that I could carry on, though there seem to be some folks who demonstrate incredible strength following seemingly insurmountable tragedies.
Rightly or wrongly, having spent Christmas so close to the location, I'm saddened by the news.
EDIT: Damn! Having posted the above, am I turning into a grief whore? Out of curiosity I looked up Facebook groups, to find some rapidly expanding groups:
Hey, BigBird. Bearing in mind your above post and a post of yours on the "boy hanged in woods" thread, about kids being subjected to "counselling", I would be grateful of your opinion on the school's handling of this sad incident. I had decided that I would not post something so personal on Arrse, but perhaps I will:
My 5 year old granddaughter lives not far from where this incident took place and attends the infant school where this little girl was in the reception year. Until she returned to school she was unaware of this tragedy. Because this is such an unreconcilable and extraordinary tragedy and, thinking that 5 year olds seem to only register certain experiences, and that "gossip" in an infant school might not be an issue, our policy, as a family, was not to tell my granddaughter. FFS, how and why do you tell a 5 year old a little girl was shot dead by her father?!?!?!
Anyway, the first day back at school after Xmas (and only day, because the school was closed because of snow and ice), my daughter picked her up from school. My granddaughter came out of school, with a cocky attitude, saying, "A girl in year R, called Maisie, is dead and her mummy is dead, because her daddy shot them with a gun and killed himself. I'm not going to play the gun game anymore." When asked, she told my daughter that her teacher had given her the information. We were not pleased at the way this seems to have been handled.
My granddaughter does not seem to have mentioned the tragedy and seems to be working through it through play?
Her little friend, who idolises her dad, was reluctant to look him in the eye the other day. She told him, "If you get cross with me, are you going to kill me?"
EDIT: I don't know if it would be unreasonable, but I had thought the school may have consulted parents before telling the kids? After all, (unless it's changed) there used to be consultation before embarking on sex education with kids; which, after all, is something basic to life and, in primary school, very elementary.
I don't know much about child psychology, but read somewhere it's best to be open with kids. But, surely that's about the deaths they need to know about. I really don't think 5 year olds would be talking to each other about this horror (if not told by the teacher). They don't really seem to eaves-drop either? Unless it concerns Santa or the sweet shop? And they tend to get the wrong end of the stick?
My granddaughter talks about the death of her great granddad and says she misses him, but is aware that this was a "normal" death, because, to her, being in his 60s is very old.
And it was important for her to learn that the pet rabbit died, because it was very poorly, and is now at peace.
I guess my granddaughter is not traumatised by the news of this horrific incident, but I really do wish she hadn't been told ....... or the "telling" was handled differently.