: Kids Pocket Money - cheap Victorian Child Slave Labour :

#1
My wee 6yr old daughter asked me if she could sponsor a Dolphin as she loves animals. I explained that it would be in lieu of pocket money, she said that Dolphins are more important then sweets. Rabbi 58_Pattern did £4stg a month. For the last 2 weeks the child has waited on me hand & foot. Washed the car, helped her mom. Cleaned my house, washes dishes, hoovers and can't do enough. I have told her that for every task & bit of help she does around the house then I give more money to 'Rainbow' her wee Dolphin. Today she did 3hrs housework for me and I told her that her Dolphin will be getting special food delivered by a diver. Is that wrong ?
 
#2
Not wrong at all. Very good in fact.


What is wrong is you continually using the spelling 'mom' instead of 'mum' despite the fact you are British.
 
#3
Flash I am V British but somehow I managed to start using mom rather than mum. Anyway dear knows what you would do if you had a wee Dolphin for £4Stg a month. The mind boggles !!!
 
#5
58_Pattern said:
Flash I am V British but somehow I managed to start using mom rather than mum. Anyway dear knows what you would do if you had a wee Dolphin for £4Stg a month. The mind boggles !!!

It's yet another crappy americanism that is being allowed to drift into the English language. You'll be missing the s of maths next.


If I had a Dolphin?












I'd fuck it's blow hole.
 
#6
Your very encouragable Flash. I remember a story & it was either over here in Dingle or I think Newcastle (Geordieland) not Co Down and there was Dolphin called Freddy and some bloke gave it a wafty krank and got arrested for an obsecene act with an animal. Must have been years ago. were you that man Flash ?
 
#7
58_Pattern said:
Your very encouragable Flash. I remember a story & it was either over here in Dingle or I think Newcastle (Geordieland) not Co Down and there was Dolphin called Freddy and some bloke gave it a wafty krank and got arrested for an obsecene act with an animal. Must have been years ago. were you that man Flash ?
I wouldn't have done such a despicable thing.

I would at least have taken it out for a meal first.
 
#8
58_Pattern said:
Your very encouragable Flash. I remember a story & it was either over here in Dingle or I think Newcastle (Geordieland) not Co Down and there was Dolphin called Freddy and some bloke gave it a wafty krank and got arrested for an obsecene act with an animal. Must have been years ago. were you that man Flash ?
Freddy the dolphin from Amble, Northumbria. Local bloke was arrested for lewd behaviour after being spotted cadging a ride by grabbing on to Freddie's erection.

You couldn't make it up!!
 
#9
In a Newcastle-upon-Tyne crown court, Mr. Alan Cooper was accused of ``outraging public decency.'' As the Times of London reported it, the prosecution accused Mr. Cooper of ``committing a lewd, obscene, and disgusting act on the 12-foot dolphin called Freddie as they frolicked for 20 minutes off the harbor mouth at Amble, Northumberland.'' Freddie has become somewhat of a tourist attraction and according to the prosecution, ``a boatload of onlookers watched `disgusted' as Mr. Cooper, wearing a blue and yellow wet suit, masturbated the half-ton mammal as it floated on its back.'' Mr. Cooper, the Times helpfully adds, is unmarried.
http://www.praxagora.com/sierra/flum/9203.htm
 
#10
"Masturbated the half-ton mammal"...now that is a phrase you just don't get to use often enough! Mind you, it could describe some of my sexual exploits in the immediate post-divorce period when my catchment area was Farnborough/Aldershot...

As for 58 Pattern's conduct on this occasion...admonished you little tinker! March out...oh and don't forget your tuna!
 
#11
Cuddles said:
"Masturbated the half-ton mammal"...now that is a phrase you just don't get to use often enough! Mind you, it could describe some of my sexual exploits in the immediate post-divorce period when my catchment area was Farnborough/Aldershot...
I think that's a different thread cuddles :p
 
#12
The_Berkshire_Browns said:
Cuddles said:
"Masturbated the half-ton mammal"...now that is a phrase you just don't get to use often enough! Mind you, it could describe some of my sexual exploits in the immediate post-divorce period when my catchment area was Farnborough/Aldershot...
I think that's a different thread cuddles :p
great idea, i'm gonna start one, just to see if he'll give us all the sordid details 8O :lol:
 
#13
I went to school with him. Ian Littlefear is his name and he is a fusilier. He was charged with sexually assaulting it. ( Wanking it off)
Signed RAF Cpl From Widdrington Stn near Amble :headbang:
 
#14
I went to school with him. Ian Littlefear is his name and he is a fusilier. He was charged with sexually assaulting it. ( Wanking it off)
Signed RAF Cpl From Widdrington Stn near Amble :headbang:
 
#15
partyboy202 said:
I went to school with him. Ian Littlefear is his name and he is a fusilier. He was charged with sexually assaulting it. ( Wanking it off)
Signed RAF Cpl From Widdrington Stn near Amble :headbang:
oh your a hard lad you r.e.m.f. prick.im glad you know me but wont leave ya name.oh its so tough making up daft stuff about me behind the protection of the internet.why not say it to my face next time u see me in the pub and we can go toe to toe.ill look forward to it n show u a good infantry style shoeing u f**k pig
 

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