Well I've got a bottle of whiskey to watch the game with. Sadly it was sent out in a Morrisons Mouthwash bottle and has a slight aftertaste of the previous contents
But I'm not a tom any longer, so drinking whilst frowned upon, is not illegal for me
Support for our national teams is not conditional on them soothing our petty vanity. We know well in advance that they're shite, but they're ours. We don't tell each other they're all-conquering and then turn on them when they turn out to be the workmanlike middle-rankers we always secretly knew they were.
One of the great missed opportunities of history is that if a certain referee had gone to Specsavers in 1965, we'd have been saved a deal of boredom in the years since.
Nowhere near as bitter as the feeling of dashed expectation as you realise yet another arena in which your national ability fails to cash the cheque your national ego wrote with such gay abandon.
Being football, I use the word 'gay' deliberately.