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Just cuz she dances go-go

i have frequented many a "tiddy bar" in my years but by far the best has to be "The Platinum Plus" establishment in Memphis, Tenessee, USA.

i visited said establishment as my mate was stuck out there for a new year working in a power station so i flew out to meet him. his company had bore the cost of the hotel for him already so i could crash on floor and it made it a cheap holiday.

we tipped up at the Platinum Plus and the bouncers removed us of $10 and we were ushered inside, the place was quite empty at this time however it was teeming with oiled up, bottle blonde lovelies that only wet dreams are made of. we sat down and the waitress came and took our order. by the time the Sol had come back we were approached by two beauties and my mate disappeared with one within seconds. i exchanged pleasantries with the other but i knew the type of girl i wanted, she had to be sporting the gigantic jugs of joy that i knew american strip joints were famous for.

my mate returned an hour later due to the fact he had disappeared back to th hotel with his girl for some "hows yer father" and then i saw her, her chest entered the room before her, a stars and stripes bikini barely covered her and she began dancing. i wandered up to the stage with $'s in hand and she asked me to come forward to the stairs. she leant forward and asked me to put money in my mouth and she gave me a breast suffocation lesson and took it with her cleavage. absolute heaven!! :D

later she returned and took me for a more private dance in which she demonstrated her "other" skills

fcuk me i love memphis!

no wonder elvis lived there!
 
This will give away who I am but hey...

I had been in Germany for six months. I had been heartlessly dumped by my fiancee for a SSGT who owned an MR2 and had consequently lived at the bottom of a bottle. So on posting to Germany and receiving LOA what did I do? drink obviously.

Until...

A group of us were down town and the silent nod was given to move on. Two taxi loads of guys headed of to the nearest Sparkasse and it was at this stage it was revealed to me that the group was to parade at "Pig Alley". A quaint little knocking shop within the vicinity of Herford (exactly 3 miles from the camp gates, why didn't they select that route for the morning BFT's?).

Never having been to such a place I was aghast (wimmin being the enemy you see) so myself and my mucker "R" discussed this turn of events in the back seat and agreed that as we were the elder guys we'd go along "just to keep an eye on the lads". Yep, I was a caring NCO even then.

Upon entering the place the cheesiest grin ever seen on the earth came to rest on my face. Women, undies...me lose power of thought. I sat at the bar to order and this goddess just came over to me and put her hand on my thigh with a sultry "you want sex?" After gathering beers we proceeded to grab seats at the front of the place with the best view of the dancing nekkid lass. "R" had apparently given in and was already on his way to a back room with a blonde icelandic goddess. I thought this a poor show on his part as like me he was there to just keep an eye out but what can I say? The very next lass who asked me if I wanted sex I just had to say "yes" too. So there we go I was the second of the lads to grab me a lass.

The tariff was whispered as something along the lines of 50 DM for 20 minutes, 100DM for 45mins and approximately 200DM for an hour. Excited as I was I booked a half hour session and was taken along by the fair maiden to my room for the next 30 minutes. De-bagged and straight down with here laughin gear on my todger I thought she was keen until I realised she'd applied a condom (all women should learn this skill-fact). She then pushed me on the bed and proceeded to take advantage of my innocence. Here was the first problem. I'm no iron man but a hefty session on beer had essentially deadened things a bit and despite her best efforts I was yet to shoot my bolt. Trust me when I say that you pay for thirty minutes and thats all you get. Noty really happy with this I asked if she took Visa (the last of my cashing having been used up) she replied yes so I hand her the card and she pops out of the room. She returns with the 'madame' who wanted me to authorise a further 100DM. You have never signed for something until you've signed for it stark naked, with a hard on, a smile and cowboy boots...

Yes. I wore cowboy boots and insisted on wearing them as I mounted my ride. What I didn't know is that my fair prozzie had laughingly told the guys I was with whilst she popped out with my card. So when I had 'finished' and returned to the lads they one and all fell about laughing.

I had seconds with a blonde stunner later that evening and of course, SOP required boots, cowboy.

I returned many times over the following years and always the boots went with. When I left that posting the consensus was I should pass on the boots to the next intake of fresh meat but I could not. They held sentimental value. I have the boots still and must admit they have yet to be worn whilst bringing joy to the wife. But that's only because she knows the story I have just told.
 
In Amsterdam for a long weekend when I was but a sprightly 18 year old and went to see one of those 'Live sex shows', where you have booths circling a small revolving stage...all the lads grabbed a booth and we popped in a few Gilders and waited for the show. It was pi$$ poor really...some bloke trying to shoe horn his floppy member into this girl, who made all the right sounds, but they didn't look or seem to be enjoying it (Suppose you wouldn't for the umpteenth time that day)...maybe it was the sea of teenage faces gawking at them or the fact most of us were pointing and laughing at each other.
As the money ran out the shutter slid down, I laugh as we all followed it down, straining to get a last glimpse, then it rose again as we all fed in more coins - desperate to see if this was going to get better. Well, this went on until everybodys shutters had fallen, leaving me the only one left watching (I had been a bit keen with the Gilder feeding action). Both the couples eyes were on me and then they struck up a conversation with me!!

Her :(on all fours) "Hey, how are you"
Me: (waiting until she's slowly revolved around, as I didn't want to talk to her arrse) "Ummm...yeah, good"
Him: (just winks as he goes about his business)
Her: (noticing my complexion) "It is a little hot here, no"
Me: (Can she see I'm sweating?!) "Isn't it" (makes upward blow onto forehead)

There was a long pause as they changed position, I wanted the shutter to come down, why I just didn't turn and leave I'll never no...then as the stage turned them to face me, he started to give his best performance of the day, really going for it, she was looking at me and shouted

"Are you playing with your dick?!"

8O Woah there love...keep it down! (I wasn't by the way!)
I'm now willing the shutter to fall, wanting to turn and leave but kind of not wanting to insult the couple and hoping my mates hadn't heard that...luckily the money had ran out and slowly the shutter came down... I bowed my head with it, gave them a final wave and turned on my heels.

My mate were too busy with heads in jazz mags or next door sword fighting with 'Long Dong Silver dildos' to notice anything!
 
In best Shultzie voice from Hogan's Heroes

" I know nussing..Ist not me in ze picture mit Annie Ample, mit ze grossen titties, on my lap.in a dark and now disused ' speakeasy '.Ist not me mit big stoopid grinning face...
nein, nein.. is not me in photo..some other person mit same name. Annie vas mistookin vhen she wrote autograph. ' To .....You Were Best Ever..' "

ahem....a slightly fallacious testimonial endearingly rendered to placate my concerns over the extravagant expenditure, but tender of her nevertheless...

the Good Padre believes that the ' evidence' was long ago destroyed in a ' home renovation' project, but I felt I needed to keep something as a memory aide for my declining years...

[ I still believe, though she denies it, that she was responsible for the ' loss' of a small but artistic collection of personal photographs of a bevy of young females, I had done ' studies of' during a photography course - yet somehow both the matte finish selectively mounted prints and the original negatives have been ' missing' for some years ]...

Ahh.. Annie... the wonders and miracle of science.. I never realized silicone could move like that..what great gripping capability...why I can recall , as if it were yesterday, the.....[ drifts off into a reverie and wakes up moments later drooling into his keyboard.. ]
 
The Griffin in Theobalds Road, WC1 just around the corner from the Old Bailey. The birds are class and charge a £1 per dance to everyone in there. Take lots of coins. They like to stoke their saddlebags in yer mush too. How much more class do you need.

:D
 
House of Dolls in Fayetteville near Fort Bragg - some US porn star, cant remember her name, as guest dancer for the night giving out free private shows in a paddling pool - the best night of my life so far - very accomodating.
 
cheetas in Med Hat, I managed to spend several weeks living in the Motel above there (Park Lane motel?) with several nice young local ladies, however that is a story for another time, and not for when Mrs Phantom is looking over my shoulder

The young ladies I happened to be sharing acommodation with kept banging on and on about going into Cheetas, so eventually I gave in, went in with them. I gallantly ordered drinks for us all and settled down, ready for the next semi clad nymphette. I had just started on the first jug (of beer) when out comes that lass with the python (some touring stripper with half a zoo, she also had a siberian tiger if memory serves)
All of a sudden, and with no warning at all (other than the dancer getting her jublies out after writhing about a bit), the 3 girls start giving me grief for taking them into 'a disgusting place like this' and 'how could i do this to them' blah blah blah. I feel that i had been set up.

The worst part was yet to come, they only dragged me out, leaving my beer behind. And i had to wait till another time to see what happened to they Python.
 
Another innocent "18 year old story", if there is such a thing...

There is a certain night club in Milton Keynes, which is very smiley indeed. Now, I had a long standing agreement with my dad that after my A levels he would pay for a night out...little did I know he'd come along, and bring a friend! So, after a pub meal and a fair few bottles of wine we head of to said establishment like a chav for his gyro. A few notes later and were in....to find the grand total of

5 other people, 1 fat bastard being asleep... no stripper

granted this was early in the night, but didnt fill me full of expectations as there were many empty poles. But, after a round of drinks (3 of us, 18 quid!) a bevy of lovelys came out to sit with us and amuse us with their amazing ability to put their legs behind their heads without noticing. Wahey though a young, naive I who thought would be getting some... Anyways, so a few rounds later "G" (the friend) says "follow these ladies B, they want to show you something". Yes, they did, their intestines. Now, lets say that as I'd had a fair bit to drink I was having difficulty "concentrating" with these two ladies doing all sorts of nasty, downgrading and downright righteous acts on each other; so when i came back i was fairly nonplussed, a tad shaken, but none the less of decent operational capability (could still talk without going "ti....tit....titties!!!"). A few more drinks and roberts your dads sisters husband, we were all ready to rock again. My dad, and his friend disappear, leaving me (with my questionable woman skills) to entertain the said girls gathered around our, now 1 of 2, table.

I felt i was doing a quite good job, spewing tales of derringdo in my adventures around the globe, until this one, amazingly lovely bird comes across and says "I owe you a dance", presuming someone else had paid I took the offer and went off to the special room ( :D ) and had the greatest lap dance I have ever experienced, or compaired (telly or not!). I had no problems "concentrating" that time i can tell ye! Anyways, i got a little carried away with the touching,,,which she said was ok! My time ran out and i returned, a slightly stickier fingered, lad to the table...just in time to hear G say

"Now, Ladies, Listen closely. I may only have a small penis, but i have 18 stone to push it in with!"










We soon left, but on the way out the lovely stripper comes over and says

"Awww are you leaving now?" (peck on the cheek)
"Afraid so (hiccup)"
"Where are you off to then?"
"Nightclub"
"Ah me too, maybe see you later then!"
"Ok, see ya"

I thought no more of it, until, **** me she's there!!! On the dance floor, with common urchin in the way!!!

Sadly, did I go over and dance with her...

Did I fcuk. The worst display of me losing my bottle I've ever had. I hang my head in shame...but whatta night :D Ended up waking up in stowe, but thats a different matter!
 
Griffin in WC1, top place. Well worth a £1 of anyones cash. Nemo's in Prague - I remember seeing a delightful young lady pleasuring herself with what appeared to be a large, stainless steel thermos flask.

Venus in Farringdon, get in early and spend wisely. In the UK, the best was Liquorice in Edinburgh, awesome. I vaguely remember the charms of 'Kat' gyrating across my lap before losing the power of speech and movement. That was just before the stag was caught by the father in law in his undercrakers, being ridden around the club by a naked stripper.
 
Oh my Buddha, I've just nearly topped myself reading the adventures, I wuz thinking Sh1t what has becum of Tonys New Model Army bunch of wimps not like my day.
But then I thinks after my first trip to Bangkok in 79 several other lads went on long weekend trips from Brunei. At least two never found a bar with Go Go dancers, mind you in thoes days there where only perhaps 50 Go Go bars in town big town.
Not like today when you can find 50 in a couple of streets and er yes they are proper bars where if the young lady fancies ya looks/cash (Onesty is mi middle name) ya up and running.
john
 
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