Ben owned a small company, employing 2 people - Jack and Susan. He came across hard times and had to make one of them redundant, but was unable to decide who. Susan had a headache that day and was at the water fountain, taking some tablets. Ben approached her and said "I have to lay you or Jack off". To which she replied; "Can you jack off, cos I have a headache". Ok, OK .... best I can for a Monday morning.