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Joke from my 85 y/o Mother Received Just Now Via Email

#1




[FONT=&quot]The Woman[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Marine Pilot
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:
Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories.
There were all the regular types of stuff: spilled milk and pennies saved.

But then the teacher realized, much to her dismay, that only Janie was left.
Janie, do you have a story to share?'
''Yes ma'am. My daddy told me a story about my Mommy.

She was a Marine pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit.
She had to bail out over enemy territory, and all
she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife.
She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't
break, and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.
She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets,
killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke,
and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.

''Good Heavens,' said the horrified teacher.
'What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?

"Stay away from Mommy when she's been drinking."
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

[/FONT]
 
#5
Hah-the joke is of course a matter of opinion but the picture I assure you is of a real USMC female major F/A-18 pilot. You must not be familiar with USMC grooming standards that would not allow that haircut on a male, even jaunty aviator flying an F/A-18!

Here is a webpage on her:

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.grose.us/PC2004/pics/amy%2520%2827%29.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.grose.us/iraq2/mcgrath.htm&usg=__9LCaHLkWLmoEkf44MLiCZh-0GCA=&h=378&w=504&sz=39&hl=en&start=1&um=1&itbs=1&tbnid=tRsLpgtF439XhM:&tbnh=98&tbnw=130&prev=/images%3Fq%3D%2522marine%2Bcorps%2522%2B%2522amy%2Bmcgrath%2522%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26safe%3Doff%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26sa%3DN%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:eek:fficial%26tbs%3Disch:1%26prmd%3Do

Here is a blurb about her:

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Marine Corps Combat Pilot Speaks to Midshipmen at Joy Bright Handcock Event



E-Mail This Article | Print This Story
By Ensign Melanie Parrish
Special to Trident


<script language=JavaScript src='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/vj?z=gazette&dim=160921&abr=$scriptiniframe'></script><noscript><a href='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/cc?z=gazette'><img src='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/vc?z=gazette&dim=160921&abr=$imginiframe' width='300' height='600' border='0'></a></noscript>

U.S. Marine Corps Major Amy McGrath, Class of 1997, is one of twelve women whose stories appear in the book Band of Sisters, by author Kirsten Holmstedt. McGrath and Holmstedt spoke to an audience of more than 100 Midshipmen on Jan. 24 about McGrath’s experiences and the role women play in the Global War on Terror. McGrath, who played on the women’s soccer team during her years at the Academy, was the first female Marine aviator to drop ordnance in Iraq. Sponsored by the Capt. Joy Bright Hancock Organization, the event offered an opportunity for Midshipmen to talk to a female fighter pilot with combat experience.
During the event, Homstedt read excerpts from her book, including passages of McGrath’s story. Holmstedt emphasized her mission in writing the book, highlighting the contribution women are making to the war effort. McGrath then took the floor, insisting Midshipmen ask hard questions regarding her roles as a woman, Marine, and aviator.
The Midshipmen obliged. ‘‘What personal sacrifices have you had to make to in order to pursue your career choice?” ‘‘How do you deal with the feelings that result from knowing you have killed people in combat?” ‘‘What can we do here at the Academy to prepare ourselves for the Marine Corps or to be a fighter pilot?”
The Capt. Joy Bright Hancock Organization strives to provide Midshipmen with opportunities for professional development. During McGrath’s visit, aviation and Marine Corps hopefuls were able to glean insight into their prospective fields through interaction with the decorated pilot.
After earning her degree in political science, McGrath went on to train as a Marine Corps Weapons System Officer for the F⁄A-18 Hornet. During her tenure as a back-seat aviator, she performed numerous flight missions under several military operations including Operation Bright Star and Operation Enduring Freedom. It was during this period that she became the first female Marine aviator to fly into Afghanistan. In 2004, McGrath underwent transition training from NFO to pilot. She earned her wings in March of 2006 and has since logged over 1,300 F⁄A-18 hours.
Major McGrath’s decorations include a Navy⁄Marine Corps Achievement Medal, eight total Strike Flight Air Medals (five from Afghanistan, three from Iraq), a Presidential Unit Commendation, two Meritorious Unit Commendations, two National Defense Service Awards, Afghani Campaign Medal, Iraq Service Medal, Marine Corps Expeditionary medal, two Sea Service Deployment ribbons, Airborne jump wings, as well as her Marine Corps Naval Aviator and Marine Corps Naval Flight Officer wings of gold.{/quote]
 
#11
Hah-the joke is of course a matter of opinion but the picture I assure you is of a real USMC female major F/A-18 pilot. You must not be familiar with USMC grooming standards that would not allow that haircut on a male, even jaunty aviator flying an F/A-18!

Here is a webpage on her:

Google Image Result for http://www.grose.us/PC2004/pics/amy%20(27).jpg

Here is a blurb about her:

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Marine Corps Combat Pilot Speaks to Midshipmen at Joy Bright Handcock Event



E-Mail This Article | Print This Story
By Ensign Melanie Parrish
Special to Trident


<script language=JavaScript src='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/vj?z=gazette&dim=160921&abr=$scriptiniframe'></script><noscript><a href='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/cc?z=gazette'><img src='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/vc?z=gazette&dim=160921&abr=$imginiframe' width='300' height='600' border='0'></a></noscript>

U.S. Marine Corps Major Amy McGrath, Class of 1997, is one of twelve women whose stories appear in the book Band of Sisters, by author Kirsten Holmstedt. McGrath and Holmstedt spoke to an audience of more than 100 Midshipmen on Jan. 24 about McGrath’s experiences and the role women play in the Global War on Terror. McGrath, who played on the women’s soccer team during her years at the Academy, was the first female Marine aviator to drop ordnance in Iraq. Sponsored by the Capt. Joy Bright Hancock Organization, the event offered an opportunity for Midshipmen to talk to a female fighter pilot with combat experience.
During the event, Homstedt read excerpts from her book, including passages of McGrath’s story. Holmstedt emphasized her mission in writing the book, highlighting the contribution women are making to the war effort. McGrath then took the floor, insisting Midshipmen ask hard questions regarding her roles as a woman, Marine, and aviator.
The Midshipmen obliged. ‘‘What personal sacrifices have you had to make to in order to pursue your career choice?” ‘‘How do you deal with the feelings that result from knowing you have killed people in combat?” ‘‘What can we do here at the Academy to prepare ourselves for the Marine Corps or to be a fighter pilot?”
The Capt. Joy Bright Hancock Organization strives to provide Midshipmen with opportunities for professional development. During McGrath’s visit, aviation and Marine Corps hopefuls were able to glean insight into their prospective fields through interaction with the decorated pilot.
After earning her degree in political science, McGrath went on to train as a Marine Corps Weapons System Officer for the F⁄A-18 Hornet. During her tenure as a back-seat aviator, she performed numerous flight missions under several military operations including Operation Bright Star and Operation Enduring Freedom. It was during this period that she became the first female Marine aviator to fly into Afghanistan. In 2004, McGrath underwent transition training from NFO to pilot. She earned her wings in March of 2006 and has since logged over 1,300 F⁄A-18 hours.
Major McGrath’s decorations include a Navy⁄Marine Corps Achievement Medal, eight total Strike Flight Air Medals (five from Afghanistan, three from Iraq), a Presidential Unit Commendation, two Meritorious Unit Commendations, two National Defense Service Awards, Afghani Campaign Medal, Iraq Service Medal, Marine Corps Expeditionary medal, two Sea Service Deployment ribbons, Airborne jump wings, as well as her Marine Corps Naval Aviator and Marine Corps Naval Flight Officer wings of gold.{/quote]
So what she's still a fucking swamp donkey still couldyou pump up the G-suit to make her labia swell up?
 

TheIronDuke

ADC
Book Reviewer
#12
Hah-the joke is of course a matter of opinion but the picture I assure you is of a real USMC female major F/A-18 pilot. You must not be familiar with USMC grooming standards that would not allow that haircut on a male, even jaunty aviator flying an F/A-18!

Here is a webpage on her:
Google Image Result for http://www.grose.us/PC2004/pics/amy%20(27).jpg

Here is a blurb about her:

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Marine Corps Combat Pilot Speaks to Midshipmen at Joy Bright Handcock Event



E-Mail This Article | Print This Story
By Ensign Melanie Parrish
Special to Trident


<script language=JavaScript src='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/vj?z=gazette&dim=160921&abr=$scriptiniframe'></script><noscript><a href='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/cc?z=gazette'><img src='http://rotator.adjuggler.com/servlet/ajrotator/163107/0/vc?z=gazette&dim=160921&abr=$imginiframe' width='300' height='600' border='0'></a></noscript>

U.S. Marine Corps Major Amy McGrath, Class of 1997, is one of twelve women whose stories appear in the book Band of Sisters, by author Kirsten Holmstedt. McGrath and Holmstedt spoke to an audience of more than 100 Midshipmen on Jan. 24 about McGrath’s experiences and the role women play in the Global War on Terror. McGrath, who played on the women’s soccer team during her years at the Academy, was the first female Marine aviator to drop ordnance in Iraq. Sponsored by the Capt. Joy Bright Hancock Organization, the event offered an opportunity for Midshipmen to talk to a female fighter pilot with combat experience.
During the event, Homstedt read excerpts from her book, including passages of McGrath’s story. Holmstedt emphasized her mission in writing the book, highlighting the contribution women are making to the war effort. McGrath then took the floor, insisting Midshipmen ask hard questions regarding her roles as a woman, Marine, and aviator.
The Midshipmen obliged. ‘‘What personal sacrifices have you had to make to in order to pursue your career choice?” ‘‘How do you deal with the feelings that result from knowing you have killed people in combat?” ‘‘What can we do here at the Academy to prepare ourselves for the Marine Corps or to be a fighter pilot?”
The Capt. Joy Bright Hancock Organization strives to provide Midshipmen with opportunities for professional development. During McGrath’s visit, aviation and Marine Corps hopefuls were able to glean insight into their prospective fields through interaction with the decorated pilot.
After earning her degree in political science, McGrath went on to train as a Marine Corps Weapons System Officer for the F⁄A-18 Hornet. During her tenure as a back-seat aviator, she performed numerous flight missions under several military operations including Operation Bright Star and Operation Enduring Freedom. It was during this period that she became the first female Marine aviator to fly into Afghanistan. In 2004, McGrath underwent transition training from NFO to pilot. She earned her wings in March of 2006 and has since logged over 1,300 F⁄A-18 hours.
Major McGrath’s decorations include a Navy⁄Marine Corps Achievement Medal, eight total Strike Flight Air Medals (five from Afghanistan, three from Iraq), a Presidential Unit Commendation, two Meritorious Unit Commendations, two National Defense Service Awards, Afghani Campaign Medal, Iraq Service Medal, Marine Corps Expeditionary medal, two Sea Service Deployment ribbons, Airborne jump wings, as well as her Marine Corps Naval Aviator and Marine Corps Naval Flight Officer wings of gold.{/quote]
Try to get out of the house now and then.

Why is the dyke in the top pic wearing weird bondage gear?
 
#15
First JJH, congratulations to your mom for tolerating all those Marines around the house!

Second, not to be pedantic but the lady for whom the sponsoring group was named was Captain Joy Bright Hancock, not Handcock.

Captain Hancock was an interesting lady. She was the only woman to serve in the USN in WWI and WWII, WWI as an enlisted Yeoman-F and WWII as an officer. She was widowed twice by the time she 27 due to her habit of marrying naval aviators. She rose to the rank of Captain, which at the time was the highest rank a woman could achieve. She later married a surface warfare VADM who died of natural causes, unlike her airship pilots.
 
#17
Why is she wearing chaps, like some kind of transgender cowboy? Why is she out of the kitchen? Why is she smiling - has she not seen what she looks like?

Mingin'
 

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