joining - wives and employers reaction

Discussion in 'Army Reserve' started by trg78, Feb 1, 2007.

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  1. Hi All i.m thinking of joining, but after mentioning it to my fiance she's gone ballistic, did any of you guys have problems when you were in the same position?

    also, how did you go about approaching your employers?

  2. I didn't tell my employer, and my girlfriend thinks I go fishing with my uncle every other weekend.

    When I was mobilised I told my employer that I had broken my leg, and told my girlfriend I was on a 8 month trek in south america.

    In work I now have to walk with a limp everywhere, and when my TA mates call round the house I call them 'amigo'.

    I think its spiraling out of control. One lie to cover up the next one. After a weekend 'fishing' she caught me with cam cream on my face. I had to tell her that I had a fetish for wearing makeup. In fairness, she took it well and has promised to lend me any of her lispsticks. Anthough I think if she found the respirator under my bed she wouldnt be quite as understanding.
  3. My employer took it really really well and agreed to give me all the time I need off with pay and said tey would support me if mobilised

    Then again I am self employed

    Wife on the other hand :pissed: :frustrated: :pissedoff:
  4. Sounds like your girlfriend is a bit of a control freak. Ask yourself this, do you really want to spend the rest of your life with her. If you do then she has to be supportive of you not in control of you. If not, mag to grid and crack on, some other bird will turn up along the way.

    Yes I am bitter and twisted, I have been in for a long time. Why, because my wife lets me.

    Good Luck!
  5. Like welly, I'am self employed too.
  6. You are a Walt Civvie!! :wink: ( not derogatory!!)
  7. Personally I think most civies are walts judging by some of the CVs I have to read
  8. Reactions of employers and "other halves" vary from encouragement to ballistic. When I was mobilised I lost my job and my ex stated the time I spent away at weekends with the TA as one of the grounds for divorce (didn't mind dragging my TA pay into the settlement though the parasite).

    Now self-employed, shagging (almost) everything female with a pulse and generally enjoying life. Set your priorities and stick with them it's your life. :thumright:
  9. When I left the regular Army my wife (then still girlfriend) was all too happy.

    However a year later or so I became a reservist and she was all too happy to have out of the house every other weekend! It is all a matter of how you bring the message!

    I didn't tell my civilian boss untill after I got in. He liked having an ex NCO as an employee so I figured he shouldn't b!tch when I spent some time being a reservist! He doesn't seem to mind much.

    It all got a bit out of hand though and I am now thinking about changing civvie jobs so I can spend more time on the Army... As Fuchs said: It's your life and they are your priorities.
  10. My partner doesn't like me going away at weekends, and for the sake of our relationship I try and compromise by not attending absolutely everything. It's possible to achieve a good balance, again if you know what your priorities are.

    As for my boss, by TA experience was one of the reasons they hired me, so they can't really complain, although I've yet to take any real time off outside my own leave, which is thankfully generous. (30 days PLUS national holidays!!!)
  11. Also, you might want to mention to your bird that in 10 years time when you're bogged down with kids working 9-5, and you regret not joining and all the possibilities that it might bring, you'll end up resenting her for it. You might not regret not joining, but you might always wonder what if. Try it for a while, and if she can't cope alone at weekends get her to join too, or tell her to join a knitting circle.
  12. i am already working 9-5 and bogged down with kids!
  13. ok, I didn't quite mean it that way - I apparently have my insensitive head on today! What I meant was at some point in your life it might be too late. If you're keen, I highly recommend having a go. The TA can be very flexible, besides it will be a good few months before you're trained or qualfied and you can use that time to get a feel for the way it might impact your personal life. You'll never know unless you have a go!
  14. thanks for your advice, just have to do a little work on my fiance now!

    and no(before anyone suggests it) i'm not about to say f**k you i'll do what i like!
  15. Definitely do it Mate,

    I left because my wife didn't like the time it took up.

    Then she divorced me, b*tch!

    Now I'd love to be back in, but I'm too old!