Job Seekers Allowance - Retiring from UKSF

Not sure if this is the correct place to post but;

This may be of interest to anyone about to retire or terminate their Service and is considering taking time out.

I thought that having recently retired from the Army, and whilst taking a sabbatical before finding another job, I would inform the Department for Works and Pensions (DWP), to ensure that my National Insurance (NI) contributions were kept up to date. There in lay my mistake, believing that my past 23 and a bit years subscriptions to this 'fine' institution would stand me in good stead.

Anyway, following a long telephone call, (40 minutes), and completing an equally long form, (30 pages), I was given an appointment at my local Job Centre Plus in order to discuss my claim with a 'Handler'.

On the day itself, I was met at the 'front office' by 4 burley, uniformed members of Group 4 security who looked decidedly edgy, as if they were waiting for either me or someone else to 'kick off'. A conversation took place, (there were absolutely no pleasantries).

The place was full of people who were clearly pissed, (Or on something else), the majority of them also appeared to have remained unwashed for some time, whereas I on the other hand, turned up in true military fashion, on time and relatively well dressed.

I was introduced to my 'Handler', a woman, who was severely disabled. She had difficulty in speaking and only had the use of one arm, seemed disinterested, and unfortunately for both her and me, her affliction meant that the process took 1 and half hours instead of the usual 30 - 40 minutes.

I took all this in my stride, after all this was all new to me. I left with an appointment or claimant card, which indicated what date and time I was to attend every 2 weeks, in order for them to pay my stamp.

My Job Centre Plus office is very local, so I thought 20 minutes every two weeks is a small price to pay for my NI contributions.

How wrong could I be. Then followed 9 weeks of letter after letter, requesting copies of every document you could think of. Not only mine, but documents relating to my wife as well. In the meantime during this exchange of correspondence, I dutifully attended every two weeks, standing in line, (Well sort of), with the drug addicts, alcoholics and general society misfits.

After suffering this process, I decided to go and do a course, which I hasten to add I paid for myself and this course, was due to clash with my 'sign on' date.

I telephoned staff at the JCP in plenty of time and was told 'No', it's too early, ring up on the date that you are meant to sign on. So I did. During this exchange I was subjected to a series of questions the Gestapo would of been proud of; 'Where's the course', 'who is running it', 'Can you prove that you are on the course' etc.

Again following the instructions, I telephoned their office on my sign on date and was spoken to by a rather rude, unsympathetic and sarcastic 'Gentleman' who begrudgingly gave me an appointment for early o'clock the following Monday.

I turned up on Monday, with the requisite documentary proof in hand and was told that the evidence, (My Course Certificate), was not good enough and that I would have to go in front of an 'adjudication' panel (Consisting of two people), who would assess my claim to see if my 'absence' was justified, or whether to discontinue my claim.

I got rather annoyed at this point and hot under the collar. But remained calmly annoyed.

I pointed out that not only had I paid my stamp since the age of 16, that I had also complied with everything they had asked me to do and that to date (Despite their sodding review), how could they withdraw my NI contributions, when as yet, they had not been kind enough to send me a letter telling me that they were actually going to pay it. I politely told them to 'sod off' and signed off there and then.

I think the woman was delighted. Yet another triumph in their local statistics.

I got a letter two days after signing off, telling me that I was not entitled to JSA, (I already knew that before starting the process). I still to this date do not know if they agreed to pay my stamp, but if I am truthful I am past caring.

I thought at the outset that I would play the game. Having gone through the process, I wish I had never bothered.

To anybody else who was thinking of applying for your ‘stamp’? I would strongly advise you not to bother your ARRSE.

On a side issue, throughout my experience, the majority of individuals in the Job Centre were foreigners. I lost count of the amount of times I overheard a 'Handler' say, 'You will receive a payment(s) this week'.

The whole system is an absolute joke. Was I nieve, I don't think so. Just thought I would let the goberment do what it's supposed to do.

It was a degrading and worthless experience, which I hope, having read this post, no one will contemplate emulating.

Edited to correct grammar.
I hate to say it but I'm sure that your experiences at the hands/flippers of the DHS Mongs are pretty typical.
You are a statistic to them and statistics are not supposed to answer back
Just imagine if you were trying to get a roof over your head as well,my sympathies are with you.
I spazzed myself fairly extensively last year and was off work for 8 months. Some one told me I should "Sign on"

Fair enough I thought....................................tootled down the job center, was met by some sort of bull dike security fiend, she asked what I wanted,

to sign on I said,

right sir take this bit of paper feck off and ring this number....

But I'm here I said, can I not talk to some one other than the fecking security,

you're talking to me I'm qualified to give you this bit of paper, (agressively and offended)

Got herded to a desk manned by some anorexic bird with her fingers covered in plasters (I mean every singly area of each finger plastered up)

I've paid my dues what can you do for me I'm spazzed

Why aren't you working

Because I'm quite obviously spazzed

Have you talked to your employer

I'm self employed

well we can't do anything for you


next scum bag

Thats not right can I have a second opinion


Go on talk to them people over there at least

10 minutes later

Can't do anything for you............................................................


Talk to your accountant

I've paid my wack since leaving schoo, I've also pumped sh+t loads into the system in tax and some disfunctional c+nt behind a desk seems happier to spunk my cash dollars into third generation fecking scumbags pockets so the can get pished on aldi lager and push out more fecking wasting c=nts who further spunk my tax

The painful thing is the double wammy, sponging fecking leeches on society get cash to survive and pish up and use up a disproportional % of the services tax provide (Police run round after them, they soak up health care, prisons are filled with them, they fail to tax and insure their motors, social services wait hand an foot on them and sort out their sh+t

Etc etc :x

Rant over (bad day)
notty/gimp...same detail here, not me, but father-in-law had illness 2 yrs ago which prevented him working for 5 months....

he & spouse had both worked from age of 16, so had paid best part of 80 yrs tax / NI between them. When he was discharged from hospital they went to the stadtbureau to see if they could claim anything and were fecked off in no uncertain terms.

Reason, because they had small amount of personal savings and were home owners they were told to ram it and live off their savings...

however, i've said before, we're also to blaim for this for putting up with it....
Had the same run around with Child benefits. they stopped paying me for my daughter last May , I complained officially (and pointed out that 27 years of paying my stamp duty must count for something) reply , sorry but you don't live in the UK.

True I only pay tax on my pension and savings AND was told by HM Customs and Ex that I could not pay my class 2 NI for the first year working in the EU.

Still great to get the final warning in Dec that I OWED THEM for their overpayment in Feb 2006 and would I pay or ELSE the Customs would be forced to take the matter to a higher authority.

Still glad to see that Mr. Pavel Wijowski after getting to the UK and getting his NI card after 1 day , slogging his guts out for 2 weeks as a Turkey castrator for Bernard Matthews is getting his child allowance for his 7 kids paid directly into his Polish account in Krakow.

All those who have done 22 plus, put in for a Pensions forecast. It will tell you how much you owe for a full state pension; the full payment time is now 30 years. Due to my 27 years in I only owe 3, pay it in a one and screw UK PLC.
Similar situation.
In my time I have paid enough tax an NI to warrant my own gold plated dole office so I thought things wouldn’t be too hard.
Signed on (jumped through all the hoops and filled in the forests worth of paperwork) and started receiving the princely sum of £50pw.
I am not sure what happened to all those stories you hear about people getting so much from the state that they can afford not to work!

After a while and with no luck in finding a job my savings were gone and my credit cards were taking a hammering. I had to sell my car.
When I did I paid off my credit cards and various bills I had run up. I was left with a few hundred quid. Nothing wrong there I thought.
The next thing I know is that I am under investigation from the DSS Fraud squad! They want to know why for five days I had over £4k in my bank account! It seems that they monitor everyone’s bank accounts for unexpected deposits.
I think they thought I was some sort of drug dealer. Not just the bank account you give them when you sing on but they know about all accounts that you hold.
I explained what had happened and that it was only in my account for 5 day’s whilst clearing and was then used to pay bills that I had run up because I £50pw would not pay the mortgage, gas, electricity etc.etc. Bugger me they said I was guilty of fraud (as I had over a certain amount in my account, even though it was only for five days) and cut my weekly dole to £45pw so that I could pay back what they had calculated I owed them!
All this happened when I routinely saw all manner of scum with dirty offspring milking the system for thousands of pounds a year.
I once overheard a conversation between a dss bod (the majority of whom are mongs, limping and dribbling all over the place), and an extremely fit looking Polish girl who was trying to claim disability benefit by saying she could only lift three bags of sugar at a time! When she left she jumped into her boyfriends car grinning.
A truly degrading experience I would wish on no one.
There does seem to be a whole underclass that are perfectly adapted to this way of life and who know how to play the system. They should be taken to one side and turned into glue.

Avoid at all costs.
Looking at the OP I would think you would need SF training in interrogation to survive the stress of a first encounter with the SS. Some of you may not believe this but in the eighties it was even worse.:)

Top Tip:
Avoid large city centres for these purposes if possible.
I signed up for civ div last Friday. I have no delusions about any kind of state help, as I have been a law abiding, tax & NI contributor for over 30 years. Besides that I am in a ethnic minority (white anglo saxon). Must admit I have not gave any thought to state pension. OLD BLOKE am I in the clear? (have worked for 35 years) all told.

I retired early after Services and and Home Office. Consolidated pension meant I was not eligible for any payments ( I get enough to survive).
Went to sign on to ensure sufficient NI "stamps". I got a pension forecast that said I had enough stamps so I stopped signing on.
Incidentally, I don't know about other areas, but here those on JSA are entitled to a number of fee paid further education courses. Quite handy for work related training so it might be worth the effort(?)
Well, i suppose the people who work there dont have the best job around, having to deal with wasters every day. I didnt really have too many problems when i left the Army, i claimed jobseekers for 2 months until the start date of my new job, and i didnt even have to go in to 'sign on' for half of that because they didnt have enough people to see me. Having been in there now more than a few times with my gf, trying to get her into a job i do have some sypathy with those who work there, they cannot win whatever they do.
mandown said:
Well, i suppose the people who work there dont have the best job around, having to deal with wasters every day. I didnt really have too many problems when i left the Army, i claimed jobseekers for 2 months until the start date of my new job, and i didnt even have to go in to 'sign on' for half of that because they didnt have enough people to see me. Having been in there now more than a few times with my gf, trying to get her into a job i do have some sypathy with those who work there, they cannot win whatever they do.
Sorry fella, 'sympathy' my arrse.

If they can't tell the difference between someone who has served his country for almost a quarter of a century and has paid his due's and a 20 year old beer swilling, pipe smoking 'Stig in the Dump', then they too deserve to join the ranks of the unemployed.

Maybe then and only then, when they have 'experienced' the service, or more accurately, the lack of service that they themselves offer, would they become more sympathetic.

If they don't like the job, dealing with people who are not the brightest, politest or sharpest tools in the job, fcuk off and get another one.

I would of complained, but I took the view that if you can't even pay my stamp, why on earth are you going to deal with a complaint.
They have reduced the qualifying period to 30 years because by the time you lot get it at 65....67 or whenever, it will be worth the sum of the square root of Föck All.

I worked 40 years and paid NI contributions for 39 years. At 60 the government used to make up the years to qualify for the full pension [42 + 5 years] so thought I would in my case get 44 yers worth. Not a chance because if you lived abroad for those 5 years, even in the EU] They did not include the 5 years even though I was and still am paying tax on my pensions to the Chancellor.
I can see a gap in the market here!

Does anyone know of a resettlement course entitled "How to successfully sponge from the state and claim back all your hard earned cash with minimum effort" got to be worth £534 of anyone's money and there are thousands of well qualified tutors out there. :wink:
Go easy on the Aldi lager the gimp gets me pissed ....but your right about all the other Job centres its a waste of time ,i'm off to sign on tomorrow I know I wont get fcuk all but thats the system, got a friend who has a senior job in the DHSS and she reckons 95% of all claimants are ripping them off, but they cant catcht hem because they havent got the money or resources to investigate them .This so called goverment is a fcuking joke
chieftiff said:
I can see a gap in the market here!

Does anyone know of a resettlement course entitled "How to successfully sponge from the state and claim back all your hard earned cash with minimum effort" got to be worth £534 of anyone's money and there are thousands of well qualified tutors out there. :wink:
What and give the Chav's even more money as consultants. Not on your nelly.

Anyway I would not wear a shell suit for anyone. (Not again anyway).
I left the firm in 1995. I decided to go and sign for about 4 weeks until I started my next job. I thought that I may as well as I had paid tax & NI contributions since I had joined at 18. It was the most painful & degrading experience I have ever done. The thick as pigshit civil servant did not really seem to understand the paperwork and was a scruffy mork. 12yrs later I am now quite senior in Civ Div and I overhear civil servants talking on the train about their right to sick leave.

Absenteeism in the civil service is an average of 15.1 days (3 weeks) per employee compared to 6.1 days in the private sector.

It says it all. To me low grade civil servants who are customer facing in DHSS are folk who are low achievers. If they were good then they would be in the private sector. Their pay is not affected if they are on the sick, they have a job for life and all know their rights in life but not their responsibilites.

True unemployment in this country is at least double the Govt stats as they don't include Disability Living Allowance & other medical conditions. In no way do I insult folk with arthritis, cancer and proper pukka gen medical conditions but I have severe distate for people who get biff chits for a GP for panic attacks, stress, not coping etc.

I know in my village of one family whose kids get a Taxi to school paid for by the local education authority. They have a free Motability wee Fiesta for Dads bad back. Mom is on every benefit and DLA & gets a carers allowance for hubby & vice versa. Yet they both smoke and are in the pub a couple of lunchtimes a week.

The system is strongly geared towards spongers and not to help a genuine WW2 veteran who has failing health and has worked all of his life and paid.


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I used to work for the DWP on JSA. The original poster would not have qualified for JSA because he was not 'seeking' a job. From memory I don't think he would have been entitled to NI contributions either for the same reason.

Courses are problematic as again if you are in education you are not seeking a job.

All the bullsh@t about non-whites going to the front of the queue is just that bullsh@t. The vast majority of 'customers' are honest people making honest claims because circumstances beyond their control have left them unemployed. A significant hardcore minority are playing the system and see scrounging off the tax payer as a life style choice - and they are almost all white Anglo-Saxon chavscum.

One of the few Poles I dealt with did not get any money because he was not entitled to it under the terms of Poland's entry into the EU. As far as I could tell he was a hard working man who had been screwed by an employer who did a midnight flit qwing him a months pay. The guy had a pregnant wife and no dosh. He got sfa from the UK tax payer. I would rather have paid him than some of the local chavscum we had to deal with.

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