I've just won the euro millions!!!

#1
Dont get yer fecking hopes up.

2 numbers and a star, £6.30p

On the plus side......

Laptop..check!
Fags...check!

Alone in a pub (the gaffers have called it a night, me head chef) with full access to the bar (i'm in the bar now)....beer check..or do I go mental and pay the price working the kitchen tomorrow?........

suggestions will be greatly appreciated
 
#3
What sort of grotty dump closes by 00:30, even maccy d's stays open longer.
Country 'gastro' and the 'lympics is on...delivery guys have said that its hit everyone bar the 'chav hotspots'
 
#4
FFS man...give me a cocktail to try, and not jarrods!!
 
#5
Dont get yer fecking hopes up.

2 numbers and a star, £6.30p

On the plus side......

Laptop..check!
Fags...check!

Alone in a pub (the gaffers have called it a night, me head chef) with full access to the bar (i'm in the bar now)....beer check..or do I go mental and pay the price working the kitchen tomorrow?........

suggestions will be greatly appreciated
Fuck, I was just about to post how much I adored your every post and how much I appreciated you being my best mate.
 
#6
Fuck, I was just about to post how much I adored your every post and how much I appreciated you being my best mate.
I'm in a fucking pub mate, its still the jackpot!
 
#7
It sounds as if you've already spent your winnings on 6 double brandies and a snootful of whizz.
 
#10
Go large my friend, get the keys to the slot machine, take a ton out the back of it, play the machine and keep the winnings but remember to put a ton back in when you've finished. Nail the top shelf and wash your knob in the ice machine.

Have fun. :)
 
#12
access to a bar you say? I'm in the north/west, how far away are you?
 
#14
Awaits the unfolding of this story.....

Will it replicate that of the teenage girl who announced her 'mansion party' on Faceberk and the place was trashed to the highest order?
"Faceberk", so apt.
 
#15
It will probably end up with the OP falling asleep and being found by the cleaners facedown in a pool of vomit.
An interview without liquor and bar snacks will follow, as will future employment at a Little Chef.
 
#17
It will probably end up with the OP falling asleep and being found by the cleaners facedown in a pool of vomit.
An interview without liquor and bar snacks will follow, as will future employment at a Little Chef.
I'm actually being quite sensible. Been into the kitchen to sort the gammon out but I swear to god the pub ghosts are going to make a mess of the optics!
 
#18
Really though, there is some freaky shit going on in here tonight, and no, I have not been on the psychotropics or absinth.

500 odd year old place. the postmix (soft drink gun) has thrown a spaz and flung itself off the holder, toilet door has banged, chairs keeps creeking, footsteps, bar stool moved and I keep catching 'things' in the corner of my eye...not arrsed about them spirits though... give me a fooking mental cocktail to put on my tab!
 
#19
Really though, there is some freaky shit going on in here tonight, and no, I have not been on the psychotropics or absinth.

500 odd year old place. the postmix (soft drink gun) has thrown a spaz and flung itself off the holder, toilet door has banged, chairs keeps creeking, footsteps, bar stool moved and I keep catching 'things' in the corner of my eye...not arrsed about them spirits though... give me a fooking mental cocktail to put on my tab!
Well if you hear Derek Acorah moaning & wailing in the bogs it's time to get the fuck out of there.
 
#20
Well if you hear Derek Acorah moaning & wailing in the bogs it's time to get the fuck out of there.
If the twunt is wailing and moaning in these bogs..its because I've beaten him half to death with a bottle of vodka (full) shoved the broken shards in his thigh and left a lit zippo to keep him warm.
 

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