Its Not Just Crab Air...

BBC News

Apparently it is not just the pride of Britain's Armed Forces that get fcuked around at airports!

Matt Frei said:
...a plane full of holidaymakers bound for the Caribbean island of Aruba was left festering on the tarmac for more than 10 hours.

At least we put you in the tent of death at Al Udeid with a frozen baguette (pepperoni and processed cheese? My favourite...) and a roll mat for company.

Matt Frei said:
The engines roared into life, the wheels moved and we rolled disconcertingly past the burnt-out wreckage of a previous flight, beached on the runway like a decomposing whale. I looked out of the window to see [our] suitcases still firmly rooted to the ground.

You wouldn't get that with Crab Air, we'd have sent them to the Falklands.

Matt Frei said:
At Jayapura airport we weighed our television equipment on the kind of vegetable scales usually used at the market. I asked the man at the check-in desk about my seat.

"You get your seat round the corner!" he replied matter-of-factly.

I did as I was told and got exactly what the man had promised. There, sitting expectantly on the dirt floor, was a dislodged airline seat. It was mine. It weighed a ton and I was expected to carry it to the plane so it could be screwed into its rightful place.

I wouldn't mention that to DTMA, they may get ideas.

Matt Frei said:
I'm happy to say that I survived to see the ground staff at Wamena direct our plane to its mooring, wearing penis gourds and little else.

The very thought of a mover wearing only a penis gourd fills me with horror!

And finally:

Matt Frei said:
still have nightmares about the short flight from Albany, New York to Washington two summers ago. The official flying time is 55 minutes. We were delayed by eight hours. To make matters worse we were herded on and off the plane three times.

They still haven't got sh1t on Brize Norton though...
This is M&S Crabair?...

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