It's getting dusty in here!

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by B_AND_T, Nov 28, 2012.

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  1. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY ALL IS SECURE

    TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
    HE LIVED ALL ALONE
    IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF PLASTER AND STONE
    I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE
    AND TO SEE JUST WHO IN THIS HOME DID LIVE

    I LOOKED ALL ABOUT A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE
    NO TINSEL NO PRESENTS NOT EVEN A TREE
    NO STOCKING BY THE MANTLE JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND
    ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES OF FAR DISTANT LANDS
    WITH MEDALS AND BADGES AWARDS OF ALL KINDS
    A SOBER THOUGHT CAME THROUGH MY MIND

    FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT IT WAS DARK AND DREARY
    I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY
    THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING SILENT ALONE
    CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME

    THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER
    NOT HOW I PICTURED A LONE BRITISH SOLDIER
    WAS THIS THE HERO OF WHOM I'D JUST READ
    CURLED UP ON A PONCHO THE FLOOR FOR A BED

    I REALISED THE FAMILIES THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT
    OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS

    WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT
    SOON ROUND THE WORLD THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY
    AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY

    THEY ALL ENJOY FREEDOM EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR
    BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE
    I COULDN'T HELP WONDER HOW MANY ALONE
    ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME

    THE VERY THOUGHT BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE
    I DROPPED TO MY KNEES AND STARTED TO CRY
    THE SOLDIER AWAKENED AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE
    'SANTA DON'T CRY THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE
    I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM I DON'T ASK FOR MORE
    MY LIFE IS MY GOD, MY COUNTRY. MY CORPS'

    THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP
    I COULDN'T CONTROL IT I CONTINUED TO WEEP

    I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS SO SILENT AND STILL
    AND WE BOTH SAT AND SHIVERED FROM THE COLD NIGHTS CHILL
    I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE ON THAT COLD DARK NIGHT
    THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOUR SO WILLING TO FIGHT

    THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE
    WHISPERED 'CARRY ON SANTA ITS CHRISTMAS DAY ALL IS SECURE'
    ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT
    'MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT'


    HeHeHeHeheHe

    Titter Titter Titter

    I'm a cunt!
     
    • Like Like x 2
  2. Cunt isn't adequate for that. We need to invent a more cuntish word.
     
    • Like Like x 4
  3. Cock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcockCock,cock,cockcock and breathe.
     
  4. Bouillabaisse

    Bouillabaisse LE Book Reviewer

    Bastard. You're 3 days early. You owe me a tenner
     
  5. Now this is being a cunt.

     
  6. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    Feck off the lot of yer.
     
  7. And you started so well.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. CanteenCowboy

    CanteenCowboy LE Book Reviewer

    Arrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, fucking sentimental dreary shit.........................................

    We all know any real British soldier would be sleeping in a puddle of his own pish on Christmas Eve, and if woken by Santa would immediately go into schimf mode how Santa never brought him tha bike when he was ten years old..............................

    Fucking hate this American shit every fucking year...............................................................
     
    • Like Like x 6
  9. I am the Christmas fairy
    my tights are turn and tattered
    I spent the night in the mortar bock
    now I'm fucking knackered
     
    • Like Like x 2
  10. What a great poem. This should be posted everywhere, every year. Hang on....
     
    • Like Like x 1
  11. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    • Like Like x 3
  12. cunt.jpg
     
    • Like Like x 2
  13. B_AND_T

    B_AND_T LE Book Reviewer

    • Like Like x 3