Is this my last night on earth ??

#1
So the earth is going to be destroyed tomorrow - well guys, thanks for a great time on Arrse, it has been a pleasure.

Good things - outed James Shortt and a lot of walts
Bad things - not many really

What to do now - off for a hand shandy and a shedfull of beer now, no sense in leaving the beer for the cockroaches and insects.

If there is something after this life, I hope the new Arrse will be as good, the beer as good and the women better.

Bit late to cash my pension in now.

Have fun guys and girls, live the dream !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
#3
Don't worry too much, if the apocalypse doesn't happen, well, it's not the end of the world...
 
#4
There are going to be massive queues at the gates so feel free to get in there early by slashing your throat.
 
#7
No, it's not. But if you want to confess all your peccadillos to ensure a smooth passage to you-know-where carry on...
 
#8
There has been a collision with large asteroid NB-4562-C and it's smaller cousin ND-29719 earlier today. There is a risk of some very large fragments entering the Earth's atmosphere tonight.

List of news articles covering this below. NASA press release to follow.
http://alturl.com/2vz8c (Live Feed)
 
#9
if the end of the world happens tomorrow how the fuck will we know?

I will be getting into my time capsule soon but in the meantime, if I can help anybody out with a quick end of the world shag just pm me. (Mingers and Males and Mixtures need not apply)
 
K

Kirkz

Guest
#11
I'm a tad busy right now, will someone record the apocalypse and I'll watch it sometime in January.
 
#12
Don't be fooled by this crap, if the world was going to end the Government would have denied it by now!.
 
#13
If I am to die in an hour and a half, why the fuck am I spending my last moments of life surfing Arrse and watching Wheeler Dealers? :bom:
It'll be around lunchtime, just before the Aussies crank over into Saturday and just after the other lot crank into Friday.

My advice is to get to a decent restaurant and have a jolly good lunch knowing the bill won't arrive.
 
#14
It'll be around lunchtime, just before the Aussies crank over into Saturday and just after the other lot crank into Friday.

My advice is to get to a decent restaurant and have a jolly good lunch knowing the bill won't arrive.
Curiously, they were my plans to a tee. More along the lines of company Xmas meal though. Would be rather a pisser if I die just as I'm due to break up for Xmas.
 
#15
if the end of the world happens tomorrow how the fuck will we know?

I will be getting into my time capsule soon but in the meantime, if I can help anybody out with a quick end of the world shag just pm me. (Mingers and Males and Mixtures need not apply)
Munter I am not, but if you don't get any other offers and time is getting short, I can offer my services, in the service of mankind you understand. No queer stuff mind.........
 

mercurydancer

LE
Book Reviewer
#16
So the earth is going to be destroyed tomorrow - well guys, thanks for a great time on Arrse, it has been a pleasure.

Good things - outed James Shortt and a lot of walts
Bad things - not many really

What to do now - off for a hand shandy and a shedfull of beer now, no sense in leaving the beer for the cockroaches and insects.

If there is something after this life, I hope the new Arrse will be as good, the beer as good and the women better.

Bit late to cash my pension in now.

Have fun guys and girls, live the dream !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I could take care of your bank account details into the afterlife. Its just part of the service I offer. Please also send me any classic cars, valuable metals, nubile daughters and I can ensure you that they will all be cared for as you enter eternity.
 
#17
Well, I could take care of your bank account details into the afterlife. Its just part of the service I offer. Please also send me any classic cars, valuable metals, nubile daughters and I can ensure you that they will all be cared for as you enter eternity.
Deep down I knew that are some good caring and selfless people left in this world. You deserve to survive armageddon to bravely carry forward the flag of human kindness and fellowship into the unknown. I can help you with the nubile daughters if you like.
 

mercurydancer

LE
Book Reviewer
#18
Deep down I knew that are some good caring and selfless people left in this world. You deserve to survive armageddon to bravely carry forward the flag of human kindness and fellowship into the unknown. I can help you with the nubile daughters if you like.
You can have the ginger ones
 
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