Is it right...

BrunoNoMedals

LE
Kit Reviewer
#1
... that I'm the last man standing on my own stag night?

Every other cunt is in bed. We've smashed the pie out of Edinburgh and aimless about £600 in the Saphire Bar (with some lovely Jock strippers). We went for a massage next door and everyone bailed when the price list came out.

Do I need better friends, or more stamina? Given a choice I'd still have a face full of porridge-textured, sweat-smelling clunge.

Sent from my X10i, probably from the loo, using Tapatalk.
 
#2
If you can still type and spell at this time of the morning something went wrong! Either get the lightweight fuckers back up again, nip back to the knocking shop or failing that have a thrap?

Anyway good luck for the big day!
 

BrunoNoMedals

LE
Kit Reviewer
#5
Yeah but then so am I! The one squaddie who was supposed to be here bailed out.

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Sent from my X10i, probably from the loo, using Tapatalk.
 

B_AND_T

MIA
Book Reviewer
#6
It's a hint of things to come!

DVD's of Sex in the City and three rounds of Horlicks.

Kiss your life goodbye.
 
#7
You think that's bad, on my stag night, the future wifes mother turned up!

Although she did put on a great strip show, to be fair!!
 
#8
It's a hint of things to come!

DVD's of Sex in the City and three rounds of Horlicks.

Kiss your life goodbye.
Tell him about the weekend Ikea trips. And the barbecues with other "cubbles". And the tubes of moustache remover. And the matching crockery. And the fact that "sex" will soon just be a question to answer with "male". And the mother-in-l..... Actually, no, don't be that cruel.

LB
 
#9
The day you hitch up is the day blow jobs and brownie porking ceases as best practice, not to be resumed ever unless she is unconscious, or totaly blathered.
 
#10
It's a hint of things to come!

DVD's of Sex in the City and three rounds of Horlicks.

Kiss your life goodbye.
Your future Missis isn't Danish is she?, if she is even the Horlicks is out o' the window.
 
#11
Yeah but then so am I! The one squaddie who was supposed to be here bailed out.

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Sent from my X10i, probably from the loo, using Tapatalk.
Pretty switched on Squaddie, methinks, who wants to go on a piss up with a load of Civvies who are all in bed before the Shag anything that walks, crawls or slithers phase starts?
 
#12
Pretty switched on Squaddie, methinks, who wants to go on a piss up with a load of Civvies who are all in bed before the Shag anything that walks, crawls or slithers phase starts?
Maybe, but he is the best man.

Sent from my X10i, probably from the loo, using Tapatalk.
 
#13
X10i - Is that a new Jaguar?
 
#14
X10i - Is that a new Jaguar?
I'd probably get better mobile phone functionality and service from a Jag...

Sent from my X10i, probably from the loo, using Tapatalk.
 

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