Ok, now when I was a youf, I had the constitution and appetite of a bull shark. Nowadays, the slightest anomaly in my diet seems to send my guts into a spin, followed by the need to vent their contents. Only this lunchtime, I met the missus for lunch at a mexican restaurant nearby work - steak fajitas for me, yum! Literally 45 minutes later I'm back in my office, put the kettle on, start to read emails...slight gurgling from abdomen indicates Mr Pooh is on his way. Still, no problem - didn't snap one off this morning, so obviously those peppers are just helping him on his way... Walking down the corridor to the bogs, pains in guts increases to epic proportions, and I seriously begin to wonder if I will make it the 50ft to safety without needing to ease springs in someone's waste paper basket. Walking like an ungainly Thunderbirds puppet chasing a bus, a finally make it to the cubicles and sit down...whereupon a veritable tsunami of shite issues forth, accompanied a a genuine sensation of recoil in the lower torso. Toilet bowl a complete state - all sorts of flotsam and jetsam, including one of two missing Japanese earthquake victims. Back in my office now, I feel fine again. Is anyone else prone to these unexpected visitations, and if so, just how quickly can your food provoke an equal and opposite reaction?