Intel make computers

Discussion in 'Int Corps' started by SuperSLime, Mar 5, 2002.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. I've noticed a disturbing trend when it comes to naming what we do. Just as a note to new boys and senior officers: The British abbreviation for Intelligence is INT! INTEL means either:

    a. A big company which makes Pentiums


    b. What colonials call Intelligence, because they never use one syllable when two is enough.

    Please STOP this Americanisation! They aren't any good; why do we want to be like them?

    And while I'm at it, "IPB" means "Map Recce."
  2. ... and if we did leave everything in American what would be left for the Corps. Everything could pass from the provider to the user without the middleman.
  3. Cruel, Jimmy, cruel. They're bloody good at collection, but utterly toss at analysis and reporting. The synergy is obvious and attractive!
  4. I wouldn't know who is good at what I am not cleared to know. It is just whenever I have my arse shot at some bloody Int guy pops up and tells me he could have told me that it was going to happen but couldn't to protect their sources. :mad:
  5. Um. Truth in that and not one of the nicer things about being in the Int business.
  6. I have to admit to trying to bend the "need to know" rule as much as poss.  Sometimes though, even that is not enough - and i agree, it is probably the worst thing about the Int world
  7. :eek:

    Even when we do tell people they never listen-Op Market Garden-photo recce suggested lots of nasty Jerrie and no one believed us-how many times has that happened-any wonder when our attitude becomes "oh well, I told you so and if you need me I'll be in the Greenfly"
  8. Dell makes computers too
  9. So do IBM...

    Do you think the I in IBM stands for INT?


  10. OK, lets' all do Int(el) the American way.

    1. Let's get some bigger tents. The bigger the better.
    2. Make interior of said tent resemble Mission Control at Johnson Space Centre. Lots of desks and shytloads of IT.
    3. Plasma screens because they are important to display situational awareness. Even though you are merely projecting at the limits of your Graphics Adapter.
    4. Increase the size of the Bde Int Sections to 40 (+10). Establish clear Job Descriptions and bugger flexibility. One man one job. If he goes sick, then its tough.
    5. Push all our products out on 50 CD-ROMs - unanalysed and un collated.
    6. Assessments will be renamed "Making it up as I go along"
    7. All Source Fusion will be limited to which peice of kit gives the Gucci pictures.

    In summary:

    A. They are shyte.
    B. They always will be shyte.
    C. We are better at this shyte than them.


    Attached Files:

  11. DG

    You have discovered the plan.................... but shhhhhhhh dont tell anyone
  12. Apple make computers too
  13. How do you make a computer out of Apples? Now a pie yes, but a computer?
  14. Dubya's been using a computer for a while.