Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by TheIronDuke, Aug 27, 2008.

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  1. TheIronDuke

    TheIronDuke LE Book Reviewer

    Its insects time.

    Pissed up wasps what have been eating fruit.

    Fruitflies. What the frock are they all about?

    Big dying bumble bees chucked out of the hive to die.

    The start of those huge brown spiders who come to live in the house for winter.

    Ticks in the heather. Horrible little twunts.

    and my personal favourite, wolf spiders. Small, fast and perfectly formed. They dont make webs and are no hassle.
  2. Bumble bees don't live in hives.
  3. Fuck me it's Gil Grissom
  4. They have been unable to find pollen to fuel their return to the hive. If you place some heavily sugared water next to them they can refuel and will then recover and fly off.
  5. Or stamp on them.
  6. Well, the spiders anyway.
  7. cough, splutter, spray, cnut!
  8. Time flies like an arrow - fruit flies like bananas.

    Spiders are arachnids not insects.

    They are varieties of Tegenaria - House Spiders. They don't come indoors in late summer/autumn - they're indoors all the time. What you're seeing are randy male spiders going out on the pull. The biggest - Tegeneria parietina - can be up to 4 inches across - the prospect of something that size scuttling across the floor puts the shits up me anyway :lol:
  9. Right as the pedants and the entomologists have come out to play i will clarify the following. The Spiders are as has already been said Arachnids. However the ones we see running about are 'not coming in for the winter'. They are male Tegenaria and are looking for a shag. Their breeding season is typically during September which is when you will see the vast majority of them. Even though they freak me out spare a thought for them. They have to search out cubby holes and such places to find a receptive female. If the female is not 'up for it' or just suffering from the spidey equivalent of PMT she will kill the male.

    Bumble Bees, wasps etc are screwed once the cold weather comes. Only the recently mated queens can hibernate and survive the winter. Only honey bees can survive the winter as they have a manufactured food source, honey.

    However what would really screw our amorous eight legged friend’s chances is what is happening in Colchester or wherever it was where that guy brought home a Camel Spider in his kitbag! Serious competition, which would simply devour anything up to a house mouse.

    I know this whole post is sad.
  10. All of that applies equally to squaddies on the pish in Chatham.
  11. My bold. Its on MoodyBitch's estate apparently. NOT a happy teddy bear!
  12. Let's hope he didn't bring a breeding pair home - with global warming and all that...
  13. Just for all the Spider fans,my lodger.I was gonking out on the floor when this chap scurried across the room.I swear you could hear the patter of tiny feet. :omfg: The other lives in a Rosemary shrub in the back yard.He's devouring a wasp he just slotted.

    Attached Files:

  14. Is she ever happy?
  15. Spiders are fcukin ace, anything that prey's on flies is good in my book. However, wasps!, fcukin'ell, ive just had to smash fcuk out of a big bastard in my bathroom so my 10 yr old can brush her teeth in peace.
    All wasps get the good news from me, ever since one stung me in the back couple of years ago. PAINFULL :x

    Incidentally, do wasps have any purpose, as in- Bee's=honey, Spiders=....erm...films? or summat. :oops: