Insane dreams

#1
I just found this in a Word document on my pc.

I do not know when I wrote this or if I had been drinking at the time, but from the content, I would say most likely.

what the hell is this? said:
went to big house to get appt to see this man

bump into him in the house, chat with him and his daughter

go outside and climb into a four-tonner, pushed in whilst wearing a radio by his daughter,

go upstairs to see the library

suddenly on a train in which i drank the last of a chocolate mcdonalds milkshake, put seatbelt on because we were going down a dip

arrived, saw some men firing guns on a field near the station/complex
one has an uzi, the man is there

i generally piss off the staff by refusing to give my home postcode

I have a fight with the chief enforcer when he knocks me down and goes for my phone, eventually chopping him in the neck and then I carry him into the house and up to the library

I go inside and accidentally discover, with two others, a drugs operation inside this insane steampunk house. they actually see the drugs, i guess what's in the room. we almost get caught and i run down to the public area of the complex.

i try to buy a phone but all the phone shops are shut. i evade the staff. one of the sales girls asks me if my clothes are in a blue holdall and are mostly Next t-shirts

i say yes, she tells me the staff have destroyed them in an attempt to break me

one of the male salesmen walks past wearing my polo shirt

I scream 'cunts' and run off to find the head man so I can expose/confront/kill him and get out of this place
I can't be the only person who's had a mental dream; what are your best/worst?
 
#2
Is it signed 'Dale aged 6'?
 
#5
Don't you know about the evil little gremlins that live in your computer and randomly type stuff for you when you're pissed? Much like the Invisible Beer Gorilla, from whom I get occasional visits on a Friday night. He used to come round all the time when I was in Krautland.
 
#7
I had a dream that i was caught by my misses wanking in her knicker drawer.

I woke up with my misses screaming at me for wanking in her knicker drawer.
 
#8
I dreamt the other night that I'd hit my missus whilst we were having a row.
Not on purpose but by accident.

Not sure if it wasn't just wishful thinking.
 
#9
I dreamt the other night that I'd hit my missus whilst we were having a row.
Not on purpose but by accident.

Not sure if it wasn't just wishful thinking.
If she's half the man her mother was you'd be fucked ;-)
 
#10

sirbhp

LE
Book Reviewer
#11
I dreamt the other night that I was struggling to eat this giant marshmallow .


half me pillow had gorn in the morning .!
 
#12
I'm going to punch you in the throat until it swells like a watermelon.

Slug Hugs xxx
You've less muscle control than Stephen Hawking being chucked off a roof. It'd be like being wafted by a pipecleaner.
 
#15
Having a Law degree, I beg to differ..............................or am I likely to experience same at some point ?
I think it gets us all. For me it was tort that set it off. I remember reading about duties of care and then suddenly I was in a police car, naked save for orange body paint, clutching a muffin.
 
#16
This is what a law degree does to you.
You should forward the OP to the concerned father from the 'parents worst nightmare' thread. He might see what a law degree can do and not be so worried about his girl chinning off uni to gargle industrial amounts of bollock batter.
 
#17
I dreamt the other night that I'd hit my missus whilst we were having a row.
Not on purpose but by accident.

Not sure if it wasn't just wishful thinking.
Sounds like a 911 call in once took. Man used to sleep with a handgun beneath his pillow. Screaming in my ear by phone he'd just shot his wife in the head . . . in his sleep.

She later died.
 
#18
Dreamt I was climbing a great big fucking mountain when I needed a piss. Relieving myself off the edge of a cliff when my buckfast and Tennents addled brain kicks in and tells me to wake the fuck up. There I am, slumped near the top of the stairs with a piss stain the size of China on my jeans and more coming. I decided that it couldn't get worse so slept there for another couple of hours before moving to the bathroom floor for the rest of the morning.

My old man still has the photos.
 
#19
Lay off the cheese before bed if you want to avoid the 2am screaming yips.

Crackheads don't hallucinate as much as I do after a ripe Camembert on a small water biscuit.
 
#20
I'm not sure the dreams aren't real, and that it is daily life that is the nightmare...

Rodney2q
 

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