infantry things to know--

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by spike7451, Apr 19, 2006.

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  1. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    Cant remember who I got this off,but here it is---

    1. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.
    2. Friendly fire isn't
    3. The most dangerous thing in a combat zone is a officer with a
    map.
    4. The problem with taking the easy way out is that it is already
    mined.
    5. The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the
    enemy somebody else to shoot at.
    6. The further you are in advance of your own positions, the more
    likely your artillery will fall short.
    7. Incoming fire has the right of way.
    8. If your advance is going well, you are walking into an ambush.
    9. The quartermaster only has two sizes; too large and too small.
    10. If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.
    11. The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on
    abandoned positions.
    12. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming
    friendly fire.
    13. There is nothing more satisfying than having someone take a shot
    at you, and they miss.
    14. Don't be conspicuous. In the combat zone it draws fire. Out of
    the combat zone it draws sergeants.
    15. If your sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
    16. Never worry about the bullet with your name on it. Instead, worry
    about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant'.
    17. All battles are fought at the junction of two or more map
    sheets...printed at different scales.
    18. All battles are fought uphill.
    19. All battles are fought in the rain.
    20. If orders can be misunderstood, they will be.
    21. Tracers work both ways.
    22. If the enemy is in range, so are you.
    23. Never reinforce failure, failure reinforces itself.
    24. Tactics is for amateurs; professionals study logistics.
    25. It isn't necessary to be an idiot to be an officer, but it sure
    helps.
    26. Always know when it's time to get out of Dodge.
    27. Always know how to get out of Dodge.
    28. Your equipment was made by the lowest bidder.
    29. Always honour a threat.
    30. The weight of all your equipment is proportional to the time you
    have been carrying it.
    31. There are two kinds of naval vessels: submarines and targets.
    32. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection. No inspection
    ready unit has ever passed combat.
    33. Parade ground inspections are to combat readiness as mess hall
    food is to cuisine.
    34. Five second grenade fuses burn down in three seconds.
    35. The effective radius of a hand grenade is always greater that the
    distance you can jump.
    36. Your mortar barrage will put exactly one round on the intended
    target. That round will be a dud.
    37. Odd objects attract fire. You are odd.
    38. There is no such thing as a convenient foxhole.
    39. The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.
    40. Radios work perfectly until you need fire support.
    41. Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of
    amateurs.
    42. When in doubt, empty the magazine.
    43. If they're shooting at you, it's a high intensity conflict.
    44. Never draw fire. It irritates everyone around you.
    45. A sucking chest wound is nature's way of saying you're too slow.
    46. Mine fields are not neutral.
    47. If it's stupid and works, then it's not stupid.
     
  2. A septic, perhaps?
     
  3. 40. Radios work perfectly until you need fire support.

    It ain't British..
     
  4. http://www.arrse.com/cpgn2/Forums/viewtopic/t=8434/highlight=was+made++the+lowest+bidder.html

    http://www.arrse.com/cpgn2/Forums/viewtopic/t=23428/highlight=was+made++the+lowest+bidder.html

    http://www.arrse.com/cpgn2/Forums/viewtopic/t=20123/postdays=0/postorder=asc/highlight=was+made++the+lowest+bidder/start=30.html

    You might just have seen it on here once before. It gets resurrected every now and again. You not the first and you certainly won't be the last!!!!
     
  5. Murpheys law of combat
     
  6. It always rains when you arrive at Brecon and stops when you leave!