Inappropiate Hospital Gifts

Discussion in 'Sappers' started by Priam, Jan 1, 2007.

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  1. I was chatting to a Civvie over a few beers about Squaddie humour, when we ended up on the subject of Hospital visits and gifts.

    The first one that sprung to mind was someone having foot surgery and being given a football as a gift!

    Swiftly followed by one I heard about, a bloke who lost some toes on Medman 7 to frostbite, he was given flip flops and asked to sell his Ammo Boots.

    Lastly there was the guitar player who had his fingers crushed by a LWT, he got half a dozen KitKats, fingerless gloves and several offers to buy his guitar!

    Any more out there? Don't be shy its been a bit quiet in here recently!
  2. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    I got the wife to take a huge bunch of purple grapes in for her mate who had her farmers cut out!
  3. ugly

    ugly LE Moderator

    Oh I forgot, the wife got me "Which Bike" as I lay in the coronary care unit with a stoved in chest from an RTA!
  4. Ex wife brought me a beginners guide to yoga. I was an inpatient at CMH with fractures to spine and pelvis at the time :?

    Oh how I laughed :x :x

  5. Has Prince Charles retained some Squaddie Humour?

    I was reading the thread on Sgt "Paddy" Caldwell, 32, who was diagnosed with MRSA on a ward at Selly Oak Hospital. (I read that the prognosis is good and wish you a Speedy recovery).

    Well, while Paddy is in hospital having been shot in the neck/throat, HRH Prince Charles sends him a note and a bottle of whisky!
  6. got a mate with some penis related injury a porno
  7. After an accident in Germany that left me in hospital for a week, my so called friends went into my room and down the NAAFI to bring me some essential items that I would need for my stay because all I had was blood stained C95 kit with me.

    I was brought:

    1x Set of old style PT shorts
    1X Green sock
    1X Womans thong
    1X Can of rice pudding with no label on.
    2X Peppers One red One green
    1X green issue vest

    The two most sensible things they brought was a pair of flip flops and a mini disc player.

    Yeah cheers lads of 2 HQ!!
  8. i think you'd be hard pushed to beat mrsa as an inappropriate hospital gift...from a grateful nation?
  9. Lordy the mind boggles!! :)

    We in the troop clubbed together and got a mate a bag of bombay spice mix and red and green peppers when he had a throat op
  10. Sympathetic_Reaction

    Sympathetic_Reaction LE Book Reviewer

    My mate got his Dad a 'Make your own will' pack when he went in after a heart attack. Luckily his dad saw the funny side as he had given my mate a life insurance policy application form when he was in hospital from a climbing accident.

  11. I took in a romper suit and knitted boots to a bird who'd just had a miscarriage, along with a buttered baguette and a request for the carcass as i was hank marvin.

    I made that up.
  12. The OC was off to visit a guy in Nottingham hospital after the M1 Aircrash and we gave him a box of gifts which he though was so kind - until our mate Ba**y opened it.

    The contents were a book called Airplane by Arthur Hailey and an airfix model of a plane which had been taken out stamped on and replaced in the box.

    Apparantly OC and the civvies on the ward who were also on the plane nearly had hysterics whilst Ba**y pis5ed himself laughing.
  13. napier

    napier LE Moderator Reviewer

    One of my Lance jacks who fell off a 2-story window ledge just prior to going on SCBC, breaking both legs - got spiderman comics.

    A subaltern who stuffed his car through a hedge and banged himself about a bit - got Fast Car magazine.
  14. when my friend got kidney stones i brought him some grapes, found out he couldn't eat them so i sat there talking to him while eating them...
  15. Not quite a hospital gift, but a lad who fell off a cliff and had part of his spine removed, I knocked up a bolt man on a hospital bed, cut in half with a VOR sign on the end, as a leaving pressy at 45.