Important terminology and abbreviations for the savvy investors

Discussion in 'Finance, Property, Law' started by viceroy, Oct 18, 2012.

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  1. CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

    BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake

    himself for a financial genius.

    BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance,

    the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

    VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

    P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the

    market keeps crashing.

    BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

    STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

    STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

    STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets

    equally between themselves.

    FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

    MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

    CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the


    YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240

    per share.

    WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought

    Yahoo @ $240 per share.

    INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a


    PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.
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