"Impaled on Table Leg in Loft - Delicate Incident"

#1
BBC News - St Albans man impaled on table leg in loft

A man has been rescued in a "delicate incident" after he became impaled on a table leg in his loft in Hertfordshire.

Fire crews had to remove part of the roof to help free the man at a house in Westfields, in St Albans on Saturday evening.
They then brought the man, with the metal table leg still attached, through the roof on a stretcher placed on an aerial ladder.
He was taken to St Mary's Paddington Hospital in London.
East of England Ambulance Service spokesman Gary Sanderson said: "This was a very delicate incident to deal with and our crews worked extremely hard alongside the fire service in a very difficult environment to treat, stabilise and immobilise him before he was removed out of the roof to an awaiting ambulance."
The injury is not considered life-threatening, Mr Sanderson added.
Sounds like some botty-based bumfoolery to me.
 
#3
Expert opinion, no doubt.
Saw a medical documentary about a bloke coming into A&E with the handle of a bog brush lodged firmly up his arrse. Why, in the name of god, he allowed himself to be filmed in this condition is beyond me.

Junior doc tells her boss "He slipped and fell onto it".

"Indeed," says the boss "We get a lot of that in A&E."

The joke was on the patient. The handle had a hook on the end. During the surgery to remove it, the surgeons pulled out half his guts.

Best thing to get stuck up your arrse is an old bottle of Old Spice. The paint used to be lead based and when the radiographer sees "Old Spice - The Mark of a Man" showing up clearly on the x-ray, he knows what he's dealing with.
 
#5
#7
Saw a medical documentary about a bloke coming into A&E with the handle of a bog brush lodged firmly up his arrse. Why, in the name of god, he allowed himself to be filmed in this condition is beyond me.

Junior doc tells her boss "He slipped and fell onto it".

"Indeed," says the boss "We get a lot of that in A&E."

The joke was on the patient. The handle had a hook on the end. During the surgery to remove it, the surgeons pulled out half his guts.

Best thing to get stuck up your arrse is an old bottle of Old Spice. The paint used to be lead based and when the radiographer sees "Old Spice - The Mark of a Man" showing up clearly on the x-ray, he knows what he's dealing with.
The comedian Johnny Vegas is a ceramicist and was once commissioned to design an Old Spice bottle.
 
#8
A table leg by Christ! Words fail. No pic need be posted.
 
#10
#12
I hear the faint swish of a silken cape again.
 
#14
At least he had something to sit on when he was waiting in emergency.
 

seaweed

LE
Book Reviewer
#16
One of my neighbours who is a physician keeps an X-Ray of a 4 inch nail, as found within one of his patients, to entertain visitors to his house.
 
#17
At the back of my old school playing fields was a 5ft high metal fence with a wooded area behind,the fence had those old ornate railings about 6inch apart,I remember one lad decided to skive off & his foot slipped off the metal cross bar while he was climbing over & he inpaled himself in the ball bag,severing one of his bollocks iirc.
The school then was forced to cut off the railing spikes level with the top cross bar,and as I was studying metalwork,gues what my class ended up doing..
 

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