Im Rich!!!

Welshexpat

Old-Salt
Well good feckin luck to the feckers is all I can feckin' well feckin say.

Any fecker fecking dumb efeckin'nough to feckin fall for this feckin carp deserves to have his feckin bank account feckin wiped.

It's just one feckin up from Tom feckin Chamfeckinpagne from the feckin readers fecking digest, where I get to the final feckin draw every feckin time but never win feck all.

Feckin cash in an unfeckinmarked enverfeckinlope is when I start feckin listening!

I am not Irish.
 

exarmybrat

Clanker
I get about 3 a day from Nigeria, if you help me your share will be........ millions! I wish! what a load of POO for want if a better word! how can I stop getting them?
 
exarmybrat said:
I get about 3 a day from Nigeria, if you help me your share will be........ millions! I wish! what a load of POO for want if a better word! how can I stop getting them?
Time for a spam filter, it seems.

AVG Free works well for me, and has only let Mrs Arafat (see above) slip through in the past year or so.
 
Guess it must be my lucky day also!

Dear Friend,

I am Mr.Benson Kamara the director in charge of Auditing and Accounting Department of Union Trust Bank Plc, Cotonou, Benin Republic in West Africa, and also the account officer of Mr.Rober Bouabjian,(the MD Menemenlioglu construction sarl) of Lebanese Origin.

Unfortunately he died in the plane crash of Union Transport Africaines Flight Boeing 727 in Cotonou
Benin Republic on the December 25,2003. You may read more stories about the crash on visiting these websites: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/3348109.stm. Before his death on the 25th December 2003, Mr.Rober Bouabjian had a fixed deposit account with the bank and no other person outside the bank knows about this account or any thing concerning it, the account has no
other beneficiary and my investigation proved that his supposed next of kin died along with him in the crash.Since then I have made several enquiries to locate any of my clients extended relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful.

After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to contact you.I contacted you to assist in
transffering the money left behind by my client to your nominated account before the bank confiscates the fund.Consequently, since l have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over 5 weeks now. I seek your consent, to present you as the next of kin of the deceased so that the proceeds of this account valued at US$22.3 million can be paid into your account and thereafter you and l can share the money.70% to me and my colleagues 30% to you.We shall procure all necessary legal document that can be used to back up any claim we may make. All I require is your honest
co-operation to enable us see this deal through.

I guarantee that this deal will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.All document of transaction shall be destroyed immediately we receive this money leaving no trace behind.If this proposal is acceptable to you,kindly email the following information to me:

a. Your full names and address
b. Private e-mail and phone number
please if you are intrested get back to me immediately for more details.Have a nice day and be bless

Sincerely,
Mr.Benson Kamara
They must have crap planes in Africa, that about the third person i have had a letter about who died in a plane crash!
 
Last week, I received a story from an Army Major who claimed to have hit the big time with all the dollars swilling around Iraq and Saddam.

It all sounded very good but my Mum taught me never to trust Army Majors....

Litotes
 
One that I received was for a supposed long lost relative in Canada who died leaving it all to me.

I do vaguely remember as a child sitting on somebody's knee and he was poor then as he couldn't even afford Werther's Originals. I had to be content with another plug of 'baccy' to chew. Why, it was he who taught me how to spit. I wonder what ever became of him?

No time to ponder though, I've apparently just won the Spanish lottery.

Again.
 

The_Phantom

Old-Salt
I have been scammed. My girlfiend made me sign something in a church once when i was dressed up in my blues after I met some of my muckers in a pub across the road from aforementioned church.

Anyway, money keeps on pouring out of my account. I don't think she is from Nigeria, I think she's from Hampshire. So now there is a new threat to watch out from.
 

19hole

Swinger
It's a con you will be asked for some cash sent some strange country to a bloke you've never heard of
 
19hole said:
It's a con you will be asked for some cash sent some strange country to a bloke you've never heard of
Really????

Thanks for letting us know, that is going to save a lot of heartache.

I was just getting out my credit card as well, tell you what, since you saved me looking like a fool, send me your bank details, and I'll send you the money instead, OK???

My Thanks, Nkapoo Shagoogop (Vice President of the Royal Bank of Nigerialand).
 

DPMGuy

Clanker
Litotes said:
Last week, I received a story from an Army Major who claimed to have hit the big time with all the dollars swilling around Iraq and Saddam.

It all sounded very good but my Mum taught me never to trust Army Majors....

Litotes
Did he have a nasty cough?
 
I'm rich as well now. All I have to do is reply and win US$1000,000,000. Anyone wanna come to the Bahamas with me..all expences paid.

AWARD SWEEPSTAKE NOTICE!!!
Attn; REF NO; ILPB642857301
PRIZE CLAIM NO, AKL58976

In view of the yearly sweepstake of the above named organization held on the
16th
March, 2007.It is my pleasure to inform you that your e-mail address attached to
the above
ref ticket no number (45407), serial number 51622, lucky numbers 3-18-40-40-76,
batch number
EULO/2907/444/908/06 came up in our winning board. This invariably means that
you have emerged as the
Prize recipient of (US$ 1000, 000.00).

This email sweepstake is sponsored by a group of corporate organizations and
governmental parastatals
Drawn from major cities in Europe, to file for your claim and other enquiries,
contact our fiducial agent

Mr. Patrick Janssens of EUROMILLIONS LOTTERY AGENCY.
TEL: +32-485-715-589.or 011-32-485-715-589.

Email: euromillionagen1@aim.com

Please note, all winning must be claimed not later than 24th April, 2007.

Congratulations once more

Dr Debock Berghmans
TEL: +32-485-715-589.

Email:euromillionagen1@aim.com
 
Not again!

UNITED KINGDOM LOTTERY
The Lottery Company
P.O Box 789
Harrogate HG1 2YR
********************
Ref: UK/9420X2/68
Batch: 074/05/ZY369
********************



Our Dear Winner,

You have won the sum of £850,000.00 (EIGHT HUNDRED AND FIFTY
THOUSAND,POUNDS STERLING ) from the UNITED KINGDOM LOTTERY on our Year
2007 Charity Bonanza.


The winning ticket was selected from a Data Base of Internet Email
Users,from which your Address came out as the winning coupon.


We hereby urge you to claim the winning amount quickly as this is a monthly
lottery. Failure to claim your win will result into the reversion of the fund
to our following month.


You are therefore requested to contact immediately our Foreign Service Manager
quoting REF NO and BATCH NO
**********************************************************
Foreign Services Manager
Dr.Robert Allen
Email:claims_agent_allen6@yahoo.co.uk
**********************************************************
Provide the following information needed to process your winning claim to
Dr.Robert Allen.

Name:
Address:
Tel/Mobile Number:
Country:

Congratulations once again.

Regards,
Litza Martinez (Mrs)
I'd better stop winning and let somebody else have a chance.
 
One day they will launch a scam where the message has been produced by someone who can:

Spell.
Punctuate.
Use correct English.

Could try use ARRSE for ref doc, innit. ?
 
It is sad to see the obviously low standard of education in Nigeria.

They really should go to school rather than capturing workers from the oil industry.
 
suits_U said:
Seems like a lucrative business deal to me B_S, If we work together we could make millions :D
That sounds like an interesting offer. I am sure we could cooperate in this matter.

If you would be good enough to forward your bank details [by PM, obviously, in the interests of security] I will then contact my Advocate and instruct him to draw up the necessary papers.

Yours most sincerely,

B_S
 

Lumpy

Old-Salt
I'm rich too, so it appears, must be something to do with being registered on ARRSE..... :


UK NATIONAL LOTTERY HEADQUARTERS
Chequers Square, Uxbridge,
Middlesex UB8 1LN
United Kingdom.
Ref: UK/9420X2/68
Batch: 074/05/ZY369

Dear Winner,
We happily announce to you the results of draw of the UK NATIONAL LOTTERY,Sweepstakes International program held on 31st MARCH 2007.It is yet to be claimed and you are getting the FINAL NOTIFICATION as regards this.You have therefore been approved to claim a total sum of £753,437.00 in cash credited to file KTU/9023118308/03.This is from a total cash prize of £7,534,370.00 shared amongst the first Ten (10) lucky winners in this category B.

CONTACT FIDUCIARY AGENT:Mr.WILLIAMS STEVENSON
EMAIL: williamstevenson_02@msn.com

VERIFICATION FORM
TO AUTHENTICATE YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS FROM YOUR WEBMAIL
PROVIDER AND RECORD PURPOSES,WE DO REQUIRE YOU TO SEND
THESE INFORMATION TO US ASAP

FULL NAME...............................................
WINNING E-MAIL ADDRESS..................................
FULL ADDRESS:...........................................
SEX:................................
AGE...................................
OCCUPATION.............................
TEL.......................MOBILE................
COUNTRY................................

Congratulations once more from all members and staffs of this program.
Thank you for being part of our online promotional lottery program.

Yours Truly,
Sir.Steven Smith.
Co-Coordinator (Online Promo Programme).
 
mistersoft said:
It is sad to see the obviously low standard of education in Nigeria.

They really should go to school rather than capturing workers from the oil industry.
They do show a disconcerting level of [misplaced] initiative, though.

How did the Nigerians come to evolve such distinctive cultural tendencies?
 

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