Im not terribly impressed with Staff Officers, me...

Have just been on an exercise where I was working at Bge Hq. Had not had anything to day with staff officers up until this point. Typical staff officer to signaller. Go get my food, go get a bowl of water to wash in, go get me a brew, go wash my cutlery. You lot want to have a word with yourseves. You're only captains. Would you do that in an ordinary unit. NO. Your tp senior would grip you. Get a sense of reality, you've only been in the army a couple of years. You should be getting the siggy a brew because he's been in longer than you! :x
plant_life said:
You're only captains. ... Get a sense of reality, you've only been in the army a couple of years.
Bite begins

I think you will find that most Capts in a Bde HQ will have been in the Army 7-8 years and are knocking on the door of Major. Behaviour like that is not acceptable but these are people doing important jobs and sometimes don't have time in a busy HQ to fully administrate themselves.

Bite ends

Perhaps you should have the reality check....

Edited for inability to type properly.
Not :?: 7 or 8 years. Wow. I bow down in respect!! Seriously, not having time to administer themselves. My Squadron OC manages to find time as do all the other officers. Same with all the troop seniors and the blokes on the ground. As have all the other officers in the other squadrons I have served with. No wonder the R Sigs have such a problem with retention if the blokes are constantly being some staff officers bitch. I though we had done away with the system of having a batman.
Sorry to say it, mate, but the job of a Signal Squadron in Bde HQ is to provide Command Support, ie the soldiers support the staff. While it would be nice, manners tend to go out of the window when a Brigadier is giving you a hard time, especially when the General is giving him a hard time. It is vitally important that the Staff Officer gets to know his signallers away from the pressure of an exercise/operation so the boys know that he is not a real cnut, just a cnut when under pressure. Unless is he really is cnut, in which case drop a large spanner on his head when he isn't looking.
Years ago when I used to work on set in a Bde HQ I sorted out my particular staff officers. After the first excersise I had them trained to do everthing themselves.

What I did is a) disapear form view when not on set getting your own admin done, and b) whenever a junior staff officer told me to do something and I had to leave my set, I used to 'accidently' knock a switch to 'rebro', 'zero tune' or off frequency as I got out of my seat. The war would go on while I was away, they'd miss some important bit and they would get a bo11ocking. They would try and bo11ock me in turn as sh1t rolls downhill, but my "You told me to leave my set sir, if something went wrong it was because you ordered me to leave my post" uttered really loud in the middle of Bde HQ would get them cringing and usually get me back up from some of the SO1s who liked to prey on SO2/3s as they used to be in 'their'day.

They soon learned and I'm quite sure they had a really warm glowing feeling when they could look down their noses at other staff officers and proclaim "I look after my crew, I leave them to get on with their job and I make my own brews/meals/dohbi water".

But now we all know the truth. :wink:
Some great stuff here - I can see why I (for one) work every hour God sends keeping my blokes (even the really fcuking useless ones - and we all know at least one of these) squared away and feeling valued, respected and wanted.

'But that's your job, Clips, you're a rupert/rodney - get on with it and stop whinging'.

I hear you.

It's your job to man a fcuking radio and make brews. If you don't like it, fcuk off back to the dole queue.

Out. :D

Edited to add: If I caught anyone handing over their diggers to be washed by a tom, there'd be blood on the bird table. For real.
Calypso said:
If I caught anyone handing over their diggers to be washed by a tom, there'd be blood on the bird table. For real.
Bird Table? You not gone 'vertical'? Get with the times!
Big_Al said:
Behaviour like that is not acceptable
Read my post. I couldn't agree with you more, manners maketh man but I was mearly pointing out that:

a. These guys are not complete rouge derrieres.

b. They are busy

c. The odd brew goes down a treat!
I agree with Plantlife.

If staff officers need a brew, they can make their own.

They are supposed to be training for war :roll:

The very first rule of war is to make your signaller a brew :D

Not that I'm biased in any way of course :roll:
I think Plant Pilot sums it up nicely. Back in the 80’s (old fcuker I know) we did the very same thing. I even remember a siggy telling the Brigadier to make his own brew and for the benefit of the Capt about to be a Major – a Brigadier IS a General.

If someone in a brigade HQ is too busy to do his own admin he’s not capable of doing the job and should rethink his career choice. Of course it wouldn’t be because he’s a lazy tw@t would it Big Al?
It's your job to man a fcuking radio and make brews. If you don't like it, fcuk off back to the dole queue.

What era are you from? The Victorian?
"I'll get my man to clean your kit, no bother old boy, not like I'm doing it myself."
Fair enough a sigs job is to man a radio but not run around after jumped up tossers. Do you believe in the divine right of kings as well? :!:
"Manners maketh the man!" and they should be applied down the line, as well as up it. When the day comes that I cant spare a couple of seconds to smile and utter an encouraging inanity such as "cheers Jenkins, you're a lifesaver!" or "good man Davis, you'll make someone a lovely wife!" will be the day I hang up my spurs(fins :oops: ).
Oh yes, turning up with a tin of biscuits (for the posh and the proles alike) will minimise the risk of anything other than milk and two being added to your wet. :wink:
Wish there were a few more officers like you in ** mech brigade HQ. I am glad I only did the one exercise stuck with those bunch of fecking idiots. Glad I am posted and won't be deploying anywhere with them again. :lol:


Last time anyone brought me food when I was busy at a Bde HQ birdtable, it was a rather foxy female SO3 :D

Seriously, any staff officer shouting for brews in an HQ is likely to wind up drinking lots of 'Mr Winner's Special Sauce' which is likely to make them taste rather odd. But having said that, there are going to be times when staff officers can't get away from what they're doing in the complex and their first priority is not personal admin. It's hard to believe that some contributors to this thread haven't learned the principle of co-operation. I'm happy to get brews for people if they're busy and I'm not, and I would expect them to do the same for me.
The occasional brew I don't mind but getting somebody water to wash with is starting to take the probervial a little. The blokes do enough work as it it setting up HQs let alone running around after Rupert.
Having said that, thats what we ORs are here to do. Sort out officers fcuks up. We (my troop) were building an ITC in Kosovo a few years ago. We had to build brick plinths for the shower units to go on. The tolerance for the positioning of the plinths was about 20 mm. The troopy (who had been in a while) used a demolition ladder to position them. The brickies had to strip their work out 3 or 4 times because of this guys incompetence. He hadn't even brought any survey kit up with him and was the only one qualified to use it anyway. Sadly this balls up is one of many I've seen officers do.
My long term aim is never to work in an HQ again so long as I breathe. The fact that when I get my WO2 I won't be a watch keeper because of my trade doesn't really disapoint me that much. :p

With an attitude like that you expect to get to WO2? Surprised you can move with the chips you appear to be carrying. If your junior officers are struggling then help them out, that's what responsible NCOs are supposed to do, how do you think they will learn. Far better that than trying to clever, which you don't appear to be from your crass comments, and getting a shiite CR.

Grow up for fcuks sake.
Seems like Plant Life is one of those cnuts that make the rest of us look bad. Perhaps someone failed RCB a few years ago and has a chip on his shoulder since huh? HUH?

If your greatest anti officer anecdote id about showers I suggest you spend more time on tour and less time on this site
I don't have a chip on my shoulder. I've never been on RCB nor have very really wanted to. My trade gives plenty enough authority as it is. Am about to start a 23 month course that will leave me with some pretty good qualifications and I will be a design expert. As for my warrant I will get it in June 2013. If I choose to stay in because my future trade is very sort after in civvy street. My officers have made bigger **** ups than miss placing blocks. I was using that as am example of how officers mistakes can lead to a lot of work for the blokes. As for trying to help junior officers some just won't listen. They think that because they are an officer they know better and refuse to listen to the advice of people who have a must greater level of expertise than them. There is only so much you can do as NCO. :?

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