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'i'm ex-mil' senior copper caught shoplifting

The store is on the same development which is home to well-off middle class
people including Strictly Come Dancing stars Ola and James Jordan.
WTF? I mean WTF? I can only assume that Roger Irrelevant is now working on the news desk at the DT.
Butt end of a prank. She was asked to quietly get hold of some Fullers Earth Cream to help cover up the Red Self Storage (dartford) blemishes on the careers of the former Chief constable, Medway magistrate Anne Barnes (Chair of Police Authority) and former Kent Police Chief legal advisor Bev Newman.
She was looking for a Phillips vibrator after hearing it did a good job of shafting a troublesome Stalker.

(Another prank. reference to the role of former Kent Chief constable Phillips when he was with Greater Manchester ... before or after his FBI training ? ... allegedly helping shaft John Stalker and his shoot to kill inquiries in Ulster. Yes a Phillips vibro with a drawback they can quit without notice when the going gets tough)

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