Im a celebrity new rules

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by OSACIN, Nov 28, 2005.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Whilst watching breakfast tv saw that tommy cannon had been evicted - not that i have a problem with this - i just feel that the evictions should be handled better - my idea is that all the contestants are knelt in a circle - heads facing inwards - and the person to be evicted is then shot in the back of the head - the remaining contestants getting to bury himher in an unmarked grave in the woods - at the end when only two are left its a real head to head - they are knelt head to head, hands behind the back with ant stood behind one and dec behind the other - both having 9mm brownings but only one is loaded - the loser is neatly dispatched and the winner, before he gets to leave, gets to bury him in the jungle - and will im at it, on big brother - the contestant evicted is taken into the diary room, sat down, the room hermetically sealed and a lethal dose of cyanide gas wafted in.
    I appreciate that there may be one or two cries of foul - but - and here is the best bit - itll stop all these reality tv shows - with either z- celebrities or a bunch of total twattish wanabees.
    any one any ideas how to incorporate this rule change into strictly come dancing and x factor ???????
     
  2. YOu'll have to remind me ... is Cannon the unfunny one, or the one totally without humour?.
     
  3. Strictly come Dancing in a ballroom filled with anti- personnel mines.
    X Factor - just shoot the lot except for that tw@t Chico. That boy really needs to suffer pain before dying.
     
  4. Yes. :D
     
  5. I said much the same thing when the last series of 'Boring Brother' was on. For each challenge, the person who cocks-up should be stood up against the back wall and shot by a firing squad. That should perk up interest levels in the viewers and also do away with the 'half-arsed' performances by the contestants. Also how about, not giving them any scoff for a couple of days then placing a tray of bacon sarnies on the far side of the garden. Anyone who get to them can have all they want.....simple, except that the whole area had been sewn with AP mines the night before. I think it's a winner!!
     
  6. Reminds me of my 2 favourite sports; landmine golf and sniper football.

    In landmine golf a number of landmines are placed in the tees, fairways and greens. You bet on where, when and who is going to be the first to encounter one.

    For sniper football, a sniper in the stadium is instructed to take out one premiership footballer per week. Again bets are placed on who and what minute.

    William Hill and the Triads should make a tidy fortune as well as introducing the possibility of ridding us of rooney.

    I see the back pages of the tabloids have him quoted as saying he wants to be like Goeorge Best. Well he goes on the pi55 and beats up Colleen so he's halfway there!
     
  7. to add a little spice to grump_old_sods bacon sarnies - the winner gets to eat as many as he wants - but if they were infected with salmonella, botulism (or just cooked in an army cookhouse) then everybody wins - well apart from the contestants - but lets face it if they werent expendable they wouldnt be there in the first place. they obviously arent fulfilling any useful function as if they were useful they couldnt be taken out of cirulation for however long it runs for.

    we could also give the coords to george bush so that he can practice the accurate bombing of a location in a suburban area before he hits the al jaziarah studios